This. Week. This edition wasn’t supposed to be so morose but …
To quote the Onion: “Maybe next time we have a week, they can try not to pack it completely to the fucking brim with explosions, mutilations, death, manhunts, lies, weeping, and the utter uselessness of our political system,” said basically every person in America who isn’t comatose or a complete sociopath.
And on top of the Marathon news, the earthquakes, the shootings, and being disgusted with the news outlets’ shenanigans, my mundane life was quietly unraveling.
I spent an inordinate amount of time fixing my computer, am worrying about work sustainability and have to start thinking ahead to what’s next, and really screwed up my physically feeling pretty good (for me) on Monday. It’s always a bit of a cycle, really, pain starts, which means fatigue starts, so I prescribe extra sleep and hydration, but the pain keeps me awake. Which is, y’know, wonderful. But slowly and surely, we creep toward feeling better …
Until I got a pair of parking tickets issued by the home-local school. Which meant that my dad had let my brother drive my car again. Without my permission. In fact, against my explicit instructions that he and only he is allowed to drive my car because Sibling can’t be trusted. The excuse is always: well I got busy and he needed to X so I had to let him borrow it. No. You didn’t. His desires are not your priorities. Respecting the fact that I’ve been providing for all of you for ten years and respecting that I have set boundaries for good reasons ARE your priorities.
Dad’s logic is absolutely beyond me. When he can’t cater to my brother himself, which is often enough considering he’s killing himself working now, he decides that the next best thing is to give him the keys to my car. Instead of saying: you’re an adult, this is YOUR issue, not mine, you figure it out. There are, in fact, buses and trains in our area. Not plentiful but they exist. So Sibling could very well figure out how to get someplace with public transit. Instead he relies on making something a “crisis” and either he gets my dad to take him or manipulates him into giving up the car.
I can’t and won’t buy Sibling auto insurance because he’s not allowed to drive my cars, and my dad knows that, so if he got into an accident, I’d have a world of problems there. Even if I wasn’t held responsible, I’d still have to deal with the aftermath.
I don’t even know who this person I call “Dad” is anymore. Instead of standing up to your son you’d rather put me at fiduciary and other risk for anything he did. Because I haven’t sacrificed enough. And he wonders why telling Sibling that “by doing that, you will screw your sister over” doesn’t register. If he can’t even be bothered to look out for me, why on earth with the perpetually selfish sibling care when there are no consequences?
Dad says that he’s sure my brother has legitimate mental issues (which I still have trouble believing because my brother is historically that selfish and manipulative that it’s incredibly hard not to believe this is another one of his ruses) so he has to “take care” of him which is, apparently, letting him have what he wants when he wants it. I mean, I knew my dad had issues with being tough with his kids but this version of him is appalling and it’s incredibly hard to swallow.
We had a thoroughly unpleasant conversation hashing it out. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what his reasons are, Sibling has the freedom to make his choices, good or bad, to improve his life or not, but I refuse to be, even at a distance or even by proxy, his pawn. But it seems my dad will keep dancing to his tune by choice and I can’t abide with that.
I started feeling a lot like this ….
Ah well. The week is over and with it, I hope, all the horrible.
More cheerful links!
Linda’s inspiring me with her mortgage refi. Get butts in gear!
via @centsinthecity: Actual “kitty” pumps. These are hilarious and yet, just subtle enough I would totally wear them. Just not at that price.
Characters in your bra drawer. I nearly died laughing.
via a friend, the wonders of Google Play. He recommended some apps: Adobe Reader, Voxxer. My Nexus 4 is linked to my gmail account so when I opened those pages up, it scanned my devices, said yep! You’re compatible and sent the downloads to my phone when I clicked Install. I am living in the future.
Donna and this weather in Alaska leads to some breaking up related hilarity.