By: Revanche

My kid and notes from Year 2.8

November 22, 2017

My kid in Year 2.8 JuggerBaby legitimately and of zir own volition apologized this month for the first time. It might have been for elbowing me in the throat.

We learned from daycare that at age 2, it’s not good to pressure kids to apologize because that mainly teaches them to say the words but not necessarily mean it when the more important lesson is for them to use their empathy and care if they hurt someone. It was a little bit of a struggle but we banished “say sorry!” from our stock phrases and just demonstrated the appropriate use of apologies in our everyday interactions.

JB has offered a couple of offhand apologies, since. Big steps!

Speaking of daycare

We’re really struggling here.

Ze has at least one of our tempers, or both, and most definitely my lack of tolerance for kids encroaching on my territory, or getting in my face. A kid taking things away from zir, or yelling NO in zir face usually gets a physical reaction. That’s one big problem. The other big problem is that zir speech production is awful. That’s not the clinical diagnosis. The professional opinion is that ze has about a dozen speech production problems, or more, and will require long term speech therapy to help zir fix those problems. The earlier we start, the better the learning curve, but it’s also more challenging because at almost 3, the attention span for targeted speech lessons is pretty short. Shorter lessons means more lessons per week and all that adds up a LOT. Sigh.

Speaking of budgets…

I talked to JB about how we shop with a budget and it went over remarkably well.

We’d ventured into Michael’s, an unholy circle of temptation anytime after September 15 which is seemingly when all restraints are lost and holiday madness descends. Every possible holiday tchotchke from October through December is featured in an alarming mess of arts and crafts.

I love it.

So does JB.

Especially when there are mountains and mountains of stickers down at toddler height. Let’s be honest, I went a little sticker mad, too. 50% off? I’ll take 5!

But for the sake of pretending I was a rational adult, we had to show some judgment. JB was allowed to pick some stickers but, as one might expect, also wanted everything else ze saw. Halloween buckets! Superhero stickers! Periodic table of elements badges! That weird skull on a stick that lights up in different colors! Not the witch hat – get away!

As I gently said no to a fifteenth item, and ze plaintively asked: why, mama? I knelt down.

“Because we don’t want to have too many stickers at home- ok that’s a flat lie, and I’ve never said that sentence before in my life. I take that back.”

(A nearby stranger burst into laughter at me.)

“You have a $2 budget. That means you may buy up to $2 worth of things. Your googly eye stickers are $3, but at 50% off, they’re only $1.50. Your Spider-man stickers are $1, but at 50% off, they’re only $0.50. Together, they add up to $2, so you’ve used up all your money in your budget. Do you want to put one of these back to choose something else? No? Ok then these are the two things you can get, you can’t get anything else.”

I’m a little surprised that ze nodded and continued looking at sparkly and exciting things but stopped asking for anything else. Usually ze asks someone else to verify the undesirable answer.

We’ll continue to do this – talk about how we make choices to use our money and how not to use our money.

Play dates and parent friends

We did a Home Depot workshop with zir best friend Dee and let the kids run around the Garden Center a lot because they are adorable and giggly sillybutts. I’m so glad that we’ve met at least one kid and parents set that we can all get along with – Dee’s mom told me that at a daycare picnic, one of the other moms was really strange about “recruiting the right people” to join their friends circle. We both theorize that was a non-subtle rejection because it wasn’t followed up by an invitation. People are weird.

Herd immunity FTW!

We got our flu shots together this month. I went first, despite my hatred of needles, to encourage zir to feel less iffy about the whole thing but it didn’t really work. First, ze kept egging on the dude to “do it! Do it!” even after he’d already jabbed me. When told I’d already been gotten, the skepticism was palpable. But when it was zir turn, ze wasn’t nearly so brash! There were real tears on needle exit. Luckily this child is so easily bribed that at the mere word “stickers,” zir head popped up like a periscope and the tears were forgotten.

Doing our part in this cold and flu season to protect the herd!

Learning & responsibilities

New skills

  • Selecting the correct tubes of ointment for Seamus’s allergy treatment and putting away the medical kit when I’m done
  • Putting away groceries after shopping
  • Picking out apples and peaches
  • Hanging up zir own jacket in the closet
  • That the Abomination is a bully for punching the Hulk for no good reason
  • Kraven the Hunter is a punk bully for coming after Spidey just for sport
  • Setting the table without licking all the utensils. Ze still gives ME the small fork and takes my big fork though.

Current responsibilities

  • Cleaning up all toys and books after playing,
  • Loading laundry in the washer and dryer,
  • Picking up clothes for the hamper,
  • Clearing the table after dinner,
  • Cracking and scrambling eggs,
  • Pouring in the right amount of water and stirring pancake mix.

Precious moments

JB: I’m hot. Momma, you hot, too?
Me: No, I’m ok.
JB: Ok. You jus’ tell me when you hot too, ok? Ok!
Me: …. ok?

JB: May I have this?
Me: Do you have money?
JB: Yes! I have blue money, and le-llo money and red money.

Me: would you like to go to the Galapagos?
JB: mmm yah! Daddy you wanna go gapatacos too?

JB: I yuv you Mommy and Daddy!
Me: we love you too, JB!
JB: yes. You yuv me very mush.

JB putting on shoes: Mista Wogers nay-ba-ood would you be mine, tud you be mine …
Me: What are you singing, honey?
JB: Me? I not singing.
Ze was absolutely singing. Ze has been programmed to sing the Mister Rogers song every time ze puts on or takes off shoes without even knowing it.

:: What childhood songs do you get earwormed by?

17 Responses to “My kid and notes from Year 2.8”

  1. I want to go to gapatacos. Sounds tasty.

    I love your JB round-ups!

  2. Thank you for my monthly chuckle. The fact that JB sings “It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood” while putting on shoes is adorable. And Little Bit did the same things with the forks (and knives)…she got a knife and a grown-up fork, I got a little fork and no knife.

    (I still know the theme song from Zoom, which includes the address. “Box 350, Boston MASS 02134, send it to ZOOM!”This is so old, Massachusetts was still MASS instead of MA.)

    Craft stores are dangerous! We went into a Joanne store last weekend and I got 10 minutes nonstop “I want.” I explained that to Little Bit that a) her savings still haven’t recovered from the laptop purchase, so her options are limited and b) I’m not buying her anything, that’s what her allowance is for. That said, I now have a few ideas of what to say when her grandparents ask for affordable present ideas.

    • Revanche says:

      HAH, I’ve never seen a kid do the fork thing before, I’m bemused by it every time.

      Craft stores ARE dangerous and I know we’ll be battling the I wants for years to come because even I am sorely tempted by so many things there. But it’s good practice for the future.

  3. Joe says:

    Good luck with speech therapy. I hope it works out. Seems young to do that kind of thing, but you’re right. Gotta get on it.
    JB is doing very well with chores. We need to push our kid more on that front. 🙂
    Have a terrific Thanksgiving!

    • Revanche says:

      It does seem early but they say that the earlier we catch it, the easier it is on the kid to mend their habits. Here’s hoping they’re right! Hope you’re having a good long weekend!

  4. Sally says:

    My little one has been in speech therapy for the last 6 months– since she was about 1.25. I’m not sure if she has speech issues, but she definitely had (and still does) have speech delay.

    In our state, a speech therapist comes to our house for one hour weekly for free. We had to take her for a formal assessment, but since she was >25% delayed, she qualified. I’m guessing that California doesn’t have a similar thing? Our pediatrician told us about the program and advised us to get it rolling. It took a few months to get through the assessments and into the system, but it’s been a good thing for her and for us.

    • Revanche says:

      California has some kinds of programs I’m still figuring out, especially the qualifications part. I’m not sure how they judge it so we’ll just have to go through the process and find out.

  5. SP says:

    <3 I so love these updates. LB is so fun 🙂

  6. I love reading these updates. I think they are helpful for my future.
    I hope the speech therapy goes well for JB.

    • Revanche says:

      Thanks for reading, I hope it is helpful! And thanks for the support. I’m sure we’ll have plenty to share about the therapy once we’re further into it.

  7. For the first time ever, Baguette got her flu shot without screaming. This is unprecedented, and I am so proud of her–she’s really developed a lot of emotional resilience in the past year, and I’m so happy that she can draw on more skills.

  8. Linda says:

    It’s great that you’re teaching JB about budgeting and responsible use of money so early. (Of course, how could you not?! It’s so much a part of you and your personality.)

    I’ve been trying to figure out when I can get a flu shot, but I don’t want to overstress my body during all this eye stuff. Since I’ve had to do something every other month since July, there just hasn’t been a good time.

    • Revanche says:

      I’m hoping that we’re going to teach good judgment early enough to balance zir impulses 🙂

      Definitely don’t stress your system with the shot until you’re feeling a little better, the vision is much more critical than the flu shot if you can avoid contagious people for a while.

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