By: Revanche

My kid and notes from Year 5.5

September 21, 2020

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1,797.23; Rural libraries, $321.62.

Responsibilities

JB has daily chores to do now. The process of getting a habit formed has been painful. The whining, the complaining, the moaning and flopping about! They were easier to train as a 3 year old! But they are perfectly capable of performing the tasks assigned and so we stick to it.

One chore is setting the table. On a day I wasn’t feeling well, they took the initiative. Without any reminders, they set the table with all the usual, then filled a water bottle and brought it to the table to serve as a refill pitcher. I’m not sure where their idea came from but it made me laugh. A water pitcher for the dinner table has been on my wish list for a while but I had never mentioned it!

They were originally motivated by filling out a weekly chore chart for earning a prize but with my fatigue and the fires and smoke, and Seamus’s condition, we’ve had to skip a couple weeks. However the baseline of their having daily chores to do, on a rotating basis depending on the things needing to be done, has finally stuck.

They do want their chore chart back though, and I’ve promised to get that up again.

JB’s reads

They are absolutely loving the Catstronauts (Amazon, Indiebound), Baltazar’s Itty Bitty Hellboy (Amazon, Indiebound) and Superman Family Adventures (Amazon, Indiebound) comics. They’re also starting to get into the Judy Moody series. I saw Judy Moody at Comic Con last year but didn’t realize it was age appropriate already.

More parenting!

Some quick math: Seamus + JB who is definitely not a baby any longer + Sera + one baking baby makes four.

Just in case we had failed to add properly, JB likes to tell us we will have FOUR kids to take care of.

Yes. Yes we know.

They’re pretty excited about the new sibling. Seamus may care when the new arrival actually arrives but he’s too old to worry about helping me like he used to. I’m trying to train Sera to come help me when I get beached but she’s still too twitchy. She gets scared when I try to lean on her a bit to get up. She’s into babies, though, and is going to have trouble resisting bestowing dog kisses. We know where that mouth has been, no dog kisses thank you.

Pupdate

It’s been a while since I did a separate pupdate and I have decided *grand gesture* that we’ll combine them with kid updates. Why not. They’re all my dependents.

Seamus is aging more rapidly than we can bear. We adore him and it’s hard to see this. He’s got moderate to severe arthritis which we’re treating with All the Things to help keep him comfortable. He’s been developing neurological issues, like knuckling when he stands and walks, or misjudging distances and overcompensating or falling. He always gets back up but I dread the progression of this aging. We baby him as much as we can, he’s earned every bit of it and more, and I have pangs of regret wondering if there’s anything else I should and could have done for him. I know I’ve been doing everything that I actually can but it’s hard. He’s been prone to UTIs this year and he had a rough several months with them. We thought it was in our rear view but yet another nasty infection cropped up this month.

The funny thing about his getting older though, he’s finally less saintly with his patience. Where he once regularly let Sera share his water bowl, they would drink at the exact same time which is a hilarious sight, or even taken a step back and let her have the bowl first, he now just takes first turn at the bowl as his due. He always should have, he’s twice her age! But even as recently as last year he’d defer to her politely.

While she doesn’t understand most dogs, any kind of signal from him is respected. He only had to knock her head out of the water bowl once when she started to crowd him. She’s never again tried to shove her way in to share like she has done for the past two years. Since then, she just behind him to wait her turn. Some days, she won’t even drink if he’s outside until he’s back in and has had his drink first! She gets very little direction from him but whatever she gets, she takes very seriously.

We were working with a dog walker before COVID to give her some extra exercise once a week but that wasn’t very long before we all had to shelter in place. Since then we have had a lovely friend share some reactive dog training tips and information which has helped us recalibrate our expectations and our approach to her training. We’d hit a plateau in April and I was despairing. But we came to understand her fear a little better thanks to the dog training advice of @themariadawn and we’ve been seeing small but real improvements. I’ve noticed her looking at other dogs that would normally put her on high alert but then look up at us for a treat instead of lunging for the other dog. Previously, even dogs a block away would set her on alert. She’d stay alerted and tense until they were long out of sight. Now she might bounce with a bit of anxiety but she’ll stare at dogs across the street intensely, and then allow herself to be redirected. Lots of treats, lots of positive tones, and lots of forward motion all help us stay safely on our side of the walk. I hope she’s not reactive forever but it certainly felt that way for a while. We’re making some progress.

Precious Moments

Mindreading
JB: Mom, what’s that thing we eat?
Me: The what?
JB: That thing!
Me: … what color is it?
JB: Pink.
Me: What shape is it?
JB: Round.
Me: When did we eat it?
JB: That time with T!
Me: ….. cotton candy?
JB: YES!

When Avatar: The Last Airbender and reality collide
JB: Why are there SO MANY FIRES.
Me: Well for some of them, people are making bad choices and making sparks in dry areas where they can catch fire. That’s not all of them but the ones we know about are because people are being careless.
JB: What if it’s actually the FIRE NATION?
Me: Well, the Fire Nation isn’t real, that’s from a story.
JB: BUT WHAT IF.

:: Do you remember having wild flights of fancy as a kid? (Or do you now?) Also it occurs to me that the titles of these monthly updates should change to plural now.

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