By: Revanche

Living in the time of pandemic: COVID-19 (56)

June 28, 2021

Year 2 of COVID in the Bay Area.

Year 2, Day 99: Smol slept through the night! But chose to end the night at 5 am. Win some, lose some. I didn’t get to sleep until midnight because of my leg pain, PiC didn’t get to sleep until 2 am because of work, so we were both in rough shape. But they had a good first nap, which freed us to get work done and feed everyone breakfast and settle into a bit of a rhythm for the rest of the morning.

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Sera’s got a dry hacking cough that started last week. It was only once a day before and sounded like she was just trying to clear her throat but today it’s acting up more frequently so we’ll need to get to the vet. I wasn’t ready to go back yet. The last time we were there tore my heart to pieces. I’m not ready.

The vet’s booking routine appointments well into July, their first available is in ten days. That’s not great but I’ll take it.

This keeps turning my mind to my second dog. He developed a heart murmur which turned into congestive heart failure and it was awful. I’m hoping so much that this won’t be anything close to that.

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JB woke up very late and was a rumpled mess in mind and body. They brushed their hair and their teeth but boy was their mood terrible. We clashed a few times. We managed to pull it out of the dumpster once in the morning, and then by mid afternoon, they were wound up again over losing one of their little art kit doodads. There’s only so many crises I can manage and work on a Monday.

Year 2, Day 100: Is today Tuesday? Friday? Wednesday? Monday? I don’t know. This is how most days start: What day is it? Weekday or weekend?

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Mini milestone: I looked up from my work and saw that Smol had woken from their nap, sat up, and was just looking around quietly. That was really nice, though startling.

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Smol was crying after their bath today. I assume it was fussiness over being tired and getting wrassled into a diaper and onesie. But like night and day, they went from crying at me to smiles at JB the moment JB swung by for a hug and a kiss. Clearly, they have a favorite. It’s pretty cute.

Year 2, Day 101: We started this day before dawn. Of course. We somehow slothed our way through Smol’s first wake up, trading off in small painful increments, and collapsed back in bed when they went down for their first nap at 7:15 am. 7:15 am. SEVEN. FIFTEEN. That extra hour was so so much needed.

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My focus is all over the place. I tried to send another set of sympathy flowers, and it’s taken for-freakin-ever to decide on what kind of flowers to send, what to say in the message, then I ordered and then I canceled because I second guessed the decision. I finally forced myself to commit to a bouquet and a message. It took me over an hour to produce one short email. I’m struggling through the Pit of Despair trying to get a lick of work done.

I don’t know what’s going on, I’ve been scattered since yesterday. Also, my sunburnt arms still feel crispy. But that’s the least of my worries.

Oh. Wait. Maybe this is sleep deprivation? Even though Smol’s sleep was much better this week, I was up late last night on the phone with our friend whose spouse passed away. And the night before my pain was so high, I couldn’t sleep until past midnight. That’s not helpful!

It’s always feast or famine with my holds at the library. After struggling to find a book that’s available and putting six on hold, two came up today.

Year 2, Day 102: The babbling started before first light. We ignored it and Smol passed out again, lightly, for about 20 more minutes. It still feels inhumanely early and we’re feeling our age. On the other hand, if we manage our time well enough and go to sleep at a decent hour, getting up early isn’t the worst thing ever. I think I had to come to this conclusion back in 2005 when I started having to commute more than an hour to work one way. Getting up early and getting most of the work day done before noon was pretty good. I’m not nearly so productive now with so many things to do but the principle holds.

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JB has the best aunties and uncles. One auntie has a regular weekly call with them now where they play music and video games and draw and play with stickers and it goes on for hours. It’s the highlight of their week.

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Best nap timings today! It’s safe to say this now that the naps are in our rearview for the day. Smol slept from 730-9 am, 11-1:30, then 315-530! They got a good amount of sleep AND they were perfectly primed for a good third nap and for their bedtime. The third nap had been my third rail all week. I felt like I kept getting it wrong and they fought every single one with the most heartrending sobs. That did produce the best footage ever though. They fought that nap so long that they fell asleep sitting up. They slumped over, sinking lower and lower and lower until finally going prone. Twenty minutes later, they pushed back up into a sitting positions to do it all over again, only still fast asleep. That round ended with them toppling backwards and scaring themselves for a moment and then truly giving up for the next hour.

No such hilarity today, just the sweet satisfaction of their immediate gator roll upon being set into the crib which means they’re going right to sleep.

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I love having two bathrooms so much. It’s a luxury I continue to really really really appreciate.

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I pulled out some of JB’s old baby board books, phew they’re dusty! And I read some oldie but goodies to Smol today. I also did a plank while reading Go Dogs Go! That was both challenging and not a super enjoyable read for them.

Year 2, Day 103: It’s hard not to feel like I’ve done this to myself when I can’t fall asleep the night before (some sort of painsomnia was going on), and then the morning starts around 530. PAINFUL.

I find myself struggling with an uncertain temper today. Hangry, possibly? Or tired. Or both. Probably both. JB wanted to make lunch and needed some direction right when I was feeding Smol and trying to get them ready for a nap. It was a mental juggle that my brain just was not up for! I asked them to pause lunch prep so I could give them my full (not snappish) attention. Of course they took it the wrong way and went stomping off to their room. We had to have two talks to clear the air.

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I was also struggling to get through work so badly that, at the last minute, I poked my head into the garage to see if PiC had already taken the kids to the library and pled for release from my self imposed prison. He laughed but waited so I could throw on some real clothes and come along. It was just a 20 minute errand but I really needed to get away.

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JB suffered a terrible disappointment. PiC had intended to try a backyard camp-out. JB has been jonesing for this FOREVER. BUT our dang weather turned quickly and badly, and ruined the plans. Drat! We shifted to movie night to make up for the disappointment.

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I’m on the last set of aligners in my first box (10 of 10 sets!) and I’m seeing my teeth shift measurably. They’re also hitting that point that the ortho warned me about: chewing is now rather awkward as the alignment is changing with the top and bottom teeth. It’s pretty cool to see observable progress on this.

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