Living in the time of pandemic: COVID-19 (169)
August 28, 2023
Year 4 of COVID in the Bay Area.
Year 4, Day 150: I was in a funk waking up this morning in so much pain. Nightmares all night meant my jaws ached from clenching. A new viral thing got hold of me this weekend and started up fresh mouth sores instead of throat sores, so that’s worse. My joints are extra cranky, probably from the remnants of Hurricane Hilary passing over. Tendons and ligaments were down for the count as well.
Sigh. I’d already emailed my ENT and set up a follow up with my primary so I just needed to try and get through it.
Our nice elderly neighbor (of gift card confusion) was badly injured in a fall a week ago and her husband gave me her phone number and address where she’s being treated so I could check on her. We ordered her some treats as well. She’s keeping a positive striving spirit about it but I know she’s in a lot of pain.
Year 4, Day 151: The orthodontist office manager really ticked me off. By email, they agreed to honor the old quote from last year, but not the discount that was included. Of course, they didn’t say the latter part until we had been in the office for almost two hours getting ready to pay for the treatment plan. I politely but irkedly pointed out that our delay to the treatment start was only because their prior office manager who was promoted had ghosted me for several months. A brief but pointed silence after she apologized for that followed, and then I nodded that she could proceed with charging my card while wearing my “I’m definitely not happy with this” face which doesn’t translate VERY well under a flo-mask but translated well enough that she interrupted herself to offer me a halfway decent compensatory $75 gift card from a promotion they were running for new patients. I was perfectly aware that they had a $200 gift card promotion but the $75 made up the difference, so I didn’t bother to push harder.
I am second guessing my decision not to wait another year to start this treatment for JB. We would have needed to choose the better dental plan at the 2022 open enrollment, but we didn’t know we needed ortho coverage until after open enrollment. We’d have to choose the higher priced plan this fall, and then we’d be able to use it January 2024.
– JB may well need to have another round of treatment when all their teeth are in. This treatment is only intended to help their jaw grow in a way that corrects an overbite and makes space for the incoming teeth which are already too crowded. We can only try to set them up for success and give their incoming teeth a chance to come in straight.
– Insurance will only pay $2000 one time for any orthodontic treatment.
– This is the biggest thing, though. There’s also a very limited window of time when the soft palate is just cartilage and this can be done. About 2 years? Roughly? Their dentist said last fall that she’d recommend getting this done ASAP though we had a couple years to do it.
If we wait until Jan 2024, will that window be closed? We don’t know but I don’t really want to risk making the treatment harder on them than it has to be or even missing the boat entirely. Remember, the recommendation was made in November 2022.
I’d mentally classified this as saving that coverage for later but that felt like lying to myself. It’s better to save the money earlier than later. I think I’m more at peace with acknowledging that we are choosing to spend the money outright now because it’s the better medical choice, and that it’s ok if we don’t use the ortho coverage later.
Year 4, Day 152: Having dodged the bullet with JB’s microaggression bully from last year, we were surprised that the kid who was hitting and kicking them last year came back for a third round of attack.
I don’t know why I was surprised, I guess I had the wild notion he’d learned his lesson. But since he hadn’t, we initiated another conversation with the principal and teacher to ask for next steps. The daycare would not have tolerated a third incident but I’m getting the sense that public schools do the absolute least possible when it comes to bullying.
Canvassing my friends across the nation confirmed this sense. It seems that schools won’t do anything to intervene unless they’re absolutely forced to.
The principal’s meeting with the kids and email back to us was so woefully inadequate I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I ran it past two public school teachers to confirm that I wasn’t overreacting, and they confirmed it was boilerplate cover your ass text and that I should push back. It took me a day and a half to compose myself enough to start formulating the reply.
I’m still not done editing.
In summary, this week feels like garbage, let’s compost it for something better.
I have the sneaking suspicion that I feel this way specifically because I loathe dealing with interpersonal issues. And also someone keeps being aggressive at my kid and won’t stop and the adults won’t do anything to stop it either.
Year 4, Day 153: Right when I least needed it, because I need to get that letter to the school done today, the brain fog moved in. If I really needed an answer to the debate of physical pain vs mental impairment, who loses? It’s definitely me but also mental impairment. I hate being in pain from top to toe but at least I can mostly think even when everything hurts.
I consoled myself with the thought that their barely sufficient action has ruined my week. 27 drafts in, because this other student is the offspring of a teacher at this school and I have to worry about reprisals against my kids from teachers for holding the administration accountable for protecting my kid against a bully (who fully admits to the bullying, by the way! Clearly he feels he has nothing to fear at this school!) I have such a headache.
My brain hurts. My face hurts. My rage continues to steam out my ears.
A polite but pointed “we’re not done, actually, until you take more than the bare minimum slap on the wrist action” email should land in their inbox on Friday morning so as to ruin her Friday. I’m feeling petty and I’m not ashamed of it given how little consideration she’s paid to my kid being hurt at school.
Year 4, Day 154: Friday food review! Actually. Nothing particularly exciting this week. I pulled out frozen chili for dinner one night and whipped up an experimental GF cornbread because we had no flour on hand. Now we have no cornmeal either. (Add to grocery list, note to self). The texture was wonderful but the butter didn’t come through well and the kids didn’t like it much. I’m guessing it’s because it didn’t have a lick of sweetness. Maybe I’ll try making it again and add honey next time. We had leftover takeout from a local Chinese place one night and … Huh. I can’t remember any other dinners. Oh, right, a frozen Costco lasagna one night and then rice, salmon, and broccoli one night. Very basic stuff!
I was just telling DH that we needed to move back to more basic meals with me back at work full-time (and DC1 off to college soon).
I hope the school does something about the bullying. That is unacceptable.
Simple meals and takeout are likely how we get through for a while.
The school hasn’t said a peep, unsurprisingly.
Bullying isn’t something any schools that I know of deal well with – including the otherwise wonderful small private that my daughter attends now (she went to public elementary too). Keep at it with your emails and followup. Ask for a meeting with the principal. I know, it is more time on your part, but we’ve learned, that if you don’t push them to understand what is going on, sometimes your own child also gets identified as a problem. If nothing else, it lets your child know that you’re on their side.
Thanks. I’m planning to take it up the chain next since they haven’t bothered to reply.