About sixteen years ago, I met him for the first time. My trainwreck sibling brought home this adorable puppy he had no business adopting because he had not one thing in his life that wasn’t a mess. I was furious at my sibling – he didn’t even take care of himself, how could he drag
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October 29, 2007
that I owe FB is here!
Names will be obscured for the sake of preserving my anonymity š
I’ve been friends with BoyDucky’s sister, let’s call her One, since 7th grade. She was quite a few years younger than her brothers, so we knew them by name, reputation, and portraits hanging on the family staircase. Those of us girls who were closer to One in our younger years knew the brothers personally, but I only knew them from the hilarious/sweet stories she’d tell about her ridiculously cool brothers. And in passing, when I had dinner with her family and he was in town, he’d invariably help remind her parents that I didn’t speak Chinese when they’d start talking to me in Chinese. But other than that, BoyDucky was just One’s brother, or another Boy.
Three years ago, I started a new job at a university, the sun was setting on my relationship at the time, and I was rather wishing that I’d landed this job when I still had friends at the Uni. I had no idea that One’s brother was completing a Master’s degree on campus at the time, nor that she’d passed the word to him that I was now working there. Nice guy that he was, he offered to take me to lunch to introduce me to the campus, and we started lunching every once in a while. Lunches became longer and more frequent as we talked about everything under the sun. My proof that he had no ulterior motives in taking me to lunch was that he’d do the same for any friend of his sister’s, and he can’t remember what I was wearing the day of our first lunch. He remembers what I wore to just about everything else after he started to like-like me. š
Eventually I developed a well-hidden crush on Boy even as I realized that my 4 year relationship was truly lifeless and that I was guaranteed a good day NOT seeing the Ex. I’d given the Ex so many second chances over the years that it led to a Christmas ultimatum in which I laid out my major concerns (not the first time) and asked if he saw any resolutions forthcoming, if he wanted things to change, and if he thought the relationship was worth the effort. He said no, no and no, and we ended our relationship.
Lo and behold, Boy guiltily confessed to having feelings for me some weeks later and, though shocked, I had to similarly confess. We agreed to a trial date on which he wooed me with proper flowers and a lovely dinner, and we’ve been lucky enough to have a relatively drama-free, loving relationship ever since. He’s wonderfully supportive and understanding, even to the point of accepting my boy hair š and appreciates all the efforts I make to take care of him. I, in turn, adore him. I also loved, but stopped, the monthly flowers that he’d bring me for our monthiversaries, and the gestures of homebaked goodies and lunches he’d bring to my office. I like to think my contributions of staying with him but entertaining myself while he studied was an equally valuable gesture. Neither of us are perfect, but we compliment each other’s strengths and weaknesses pretty well. He’s learned to sense my guilt complex a mile away and soothe it from 500 hundred miles away, while I have the right to smother his temper boiling over as I see fit, or bring sanity back to his schedule and life organization. Of course, he’s never experienced the vaunted MiniDucky temper so, until then, the pot shall continue to call the kettle black.
Happily, One got over her weirdness about the relationship several months later, and even let me know that she’s glad we’re together because I make him happy and keep him even-keeled. Now, why can’t other people see it that way? š
And that’s the story of how one Boy became BoyDucky.
What a weekend! I’m working from home today because I had a doctor’s appointment, and I’m sure my desk will be a delight to return to.
Saturday should have been much more productive than it really was: I just picked up BoyDucky from the airport, had breakfast, ran a couple errands and got my hair cut. Speaking of, I should have known I was in trouble when the student and stylist instructor both asked “You mean, like Victoria Beckham?” Uhrm, no. So my hair’s pretty well lopped off, and I feel like I look like a boy. It’s ok, (insert *gag* here) BoyDucky says he still loves me. š
Total Spend: $14
My run to Michael’s for a package of blank card stock/envelopes for bridal shower invitations was postponed until Sunday because I needed a coupon, yay for 40% off coupons, and then we spent the day at the hospital with BoyDucky’s dad. Lunch (Chipotle burrito) and dinner (Thai food) were his treat.
Total Spend: Original, $15. After coupon, $10.
Monday: I’m going to try to go through Physical Therapy to get a chiropractic referral. This neck problem has been around far too long, so I hope that a chiro will do the trick. Other than that, I just had to pick up a refill on medications, get stuck with needles for more labwork, and stop at Victoria’s Secret to combine a merch credit with my gift card.
Total Spend: $25
+ $10.76 credit.
Also, had it out with my brother about how he needs to get his act together, and not return cars running on empty. He swears that he’s through making empty promises, so he’s going to try to make it back to me with funds in two and four weeks. We’ll see. Things aren’t as dire as I make them out to be, but they will be, and I shouldn’t have to make more sacrifices of my own to fix his shortcomings.
My puppydog is being dramatic, stretched out by my foot in hopes that I’ll pet her, panting and verrrry quietly whining. She’s desperate for my attention so I’ll let her stay here while I try to work. It’d be easier without a dog’s snout under my foot, nudging every few seconds that I forgot to “pet” her, though!
October 26, 2007
the more circumstances force me to wish I COULD.
We were already sharing two cars between three of us: Pa&Ma, me, while my brother was gallivanting off in his own car that he hasn’t paid for in the last 4 months. Then, my idiotic brother comes home with totally thrashed brakes and finds out that it’ll cost $600 to fix them. Never mind the fact that, according to our agreement, he no longer has the right to be making any auto-related demands, he wants Pa to call up our mechanic family friend on a Tuesday to make him fix the car.
Right. Because we are all here to serve his needs when and if he decides to exercise his privileges. As if our friend doesn’t have a job and a family and other responsibilities. Idiot. So now, we’ve got one car between the three of us because the sedan can’t be driven until the brakes are fixed, and my idiot brother is taking the truck for unknown periods of time, without considering the needs of the THREE people at home who only have one car between them.
This normally wouldn’t annoy me so very much. Weekends I just try to stay home and not need a car, or I take the train during the week, but this weekend, I need a car to go pick up BoyDucky, finally spend a little time together over breakfast and get a haircut. And Monday I need a car to go to my doctor’s appointment. But I can’t assume my own car will be available all because of one enormously entitled, poorly trained, selfish family member. Just one. That’s all it takes.
I know we’ll make do. We always find a way. It’s just aggravating that we always have to.
For those of you who don’t already know this, I hate speaking in front of crowds. (And three is definitely a crowd.) I avoid it even more assiduously than I would the plague or getting my sandal caught in the back wheel of a racing motorcycle. In fact, if you gave me the choice between speaking in front of a lot of people, or hanging out in an enclosed area with a possibly rabid critter, the odds are great that I’d choose the rabid critter. Unless it was a snake. But they can’t have rabies, so that’s beside the point. I’m rambling because even the thought of public speaking makes me nervous.
The point is, I hate hate hate public speaking. And that brings me to what I’ve agreed to do two Saturdays hence. CoworkerFriend called to tell me that he was offered a position as a proctor for the SATs and knew of another slot open, if I were interested. Ever since I lost the overtime privilege at work, paychecks have been about a quarter of their usual value. An extra hundred bucks, give or take, didn’t sound so bad, until I realized that it entails speaking. Speaking in front of adolescents. A lot of them.
Yes, I’m just to read instructions, check a timer and write on the board, but it still requires being at the front of a classroom and “orating” to a bunch of kids. Like back in high school. You know, where I really LOVED that kind of attention being paid me.
Argh! There so many other things, anonymous computery things, that I’d much rather do using much more effort and much less talking out loud to people I don’t know.
Why am I so nervous? Heckling? Kids not listening? Tripping over my own words? I do that sometimes, on the phone. I’ll get some mangled version of my name out and hope the other person doesn’t notice. It’s still pretty embarrassing, though. I suppose I wouldn’t care about any heckling, I could theoretically just kick the kid out. Honestly, with some of my friends, heckling should be par for the course. I just get the shivers thinking about all those eyes, staring at me. Yuck yuck yuck! And no, I can’t just imagine they’re all in their underwear, they’re underage so that’s even more wrong than usual. *igh*
Well, I’ve been all wrought up about how I’m still awful at toasts, and that’s just in front of a small group of people I see everyday. I obviously need to break this phobia somehow, what better way than to do it in front of a group of kids I’ll never see again? And it’s not like I’ve got to do anything original, I just have to read off a booklet. *breathe* I can do this. Really. I can. Maybe this will be the beginning of the end of my phobia? Wish me luck!
October 25, 2007
SavingDiva reminded me that I’ve been hoarding points, and so I thought I’d check on a few of my points pots like the 5100 AMEX Membership Rewards points, and the Hilton HHonors points.
My Hilton HHonors card has been giving me 5 points per dollar spent on cell phone bills and restaurants for about 3 or 4 years now, and I’ve accumulated nearly 50,000 points. Hilton phased out their airline ticket redemption and points-to-miles transfer programs sometime last year, so the only options that I’d consider are hotel stays, and possibly gift cards.
With Christmas coming up and a history of never actually staying at a Hilton Hotel for leisure, it seemed like a good idea to check out the gift card options.
Would you believe that they offer $100 gift cards for 50,000 points?? That’s ridiculous! If I just save those points up for a couple-few days’ hotel stays, I’m pretty sure it’ll be worth more than a single $100 gift card. So much for that.
As for the AMEX points, I don’t plan to use the AMEX card much … or at all, really, so I’m going to cash out those points. I was on the fence about what to get, but the conversation over at Gilded Butterfly’s motivated me to think of a gift card that would do double duty as funding for stuff I need and as funding for Christmas gifts. Too bad I can’t redeem it for Amazon.com or Target!
I can do Linens ‘n’ Things, Barnes & Noble (completely not a necessity), or Banana Republic. Everything else is too frivolously high-end, like Bloomingdale’s, Talbots, L’Occitane, and Brooks Brothers.
October 24, 2007
I’m not feeling so hot tonight, which might be due to the terrible air quality, so I’m going to:
1. Not think about BroDucky. Fussing about him last night gave me nightmares, literally, about fighting with him. Nope. Not gonna think about it.
2. Not worry about scheduling doctor’s appointments.
3. Or dentist appointments.
4. Not think about the wedding.
5. Not worry about BoyDucky’s dad, and how MaDucky seriously needs better health insurance.
6. Not worry about how I’m going to come up with 40K for my half of the house investing venture in the next 8 months. I can crunch numbers on the train tomorrow.
7. Take a shower, get into bed by 8 pm. Read a book, if I feel like it, or just go to sleep if my head still hurts.
That’s it.
1. Living la college lifestyle: I spent from 8am Friday until 4 pm Monday en route or in lovely New York. I came in UNDER budget!!
2. We stayed at a friend’s apartment. He has a little tiny loft which never sees the light of day furnished with a lamp, a fan, a little nightstand looking thing, and a full size mattress. Lodgings: free. Exercise up and down 4 flights of stairs to the apt: free. Exercise up and down the loft’s ladder-stairs: free. Finding out that my big manly friend is scared of mice, seeing him run around in high-tops to avoid stepping on an inch-long mouse: absolutely priceless. You just can’t get that entertainment in any high-class hotel.
3. Dogs. There were dogs everywhere. I have a particular fondness for this fella ….
4. Moma. Target sponsors free admission from 4pm-8pm on Friday nights. Definitely a plus.
5. Central Park. Outdoor ice skating rink, piles of boulders to climb, long meandering paths bordered by green lawns and trees; I just can’t get over the feeling of actually being in nature right in the middle of the city.
6. Food. Lunch at Moonstruck Cafe…..
7. Food. New York Pizza ….
8. Food. Cheese balls and arepas ….
9. Food. Rice to Riches rice pudding ….
10. Food. Grilled corn from Cafe Habana ….
11. Food. Green Bo Restaurant in Chinatown ….
Yep. ALL about the food. Oh, of course, there’s a dessert shop within five minutes’ walking distance, open until midnight and a comic shop open until 1 am every night five minutes in the other direction. Bonus!
The trip was FANtastic. We ate, walked, ate, walked, and ate. Rinse and repeat. We discovered the 3:40 am last call, and the fun of walking past a gazillion bars until we found one our motley crew was happy with.
Sunday was a dedicated (Eating and) Shopping Day. Best friend shopped out of Friend E’s closet and netted about 20 items including a pair of shoes and a really cute bag for FREE. It didn’t make a visible dent in E’s closet, either. And then they took me shopping which was much less fun, but ultimately successful. I’ll save that for tomorrow’s post, though.
*sigh* I love New York.
