About sixteen years ago, I met him for the first time. My trainwreck sibling brought home this adorable puppy he had no business adopting because he had not one thing in his life that wasn’t a mess. I was furious at my sibling – he didn’t even take care of himself, how could he drag
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July 26, 2017
My brokerage was TradeKing which was acquired by Ally this year. I’ve been very happy with TradeKing’s low fees and service so I’m hoping that Ally does that and better. There’s one thing I already like the look of. For investors with at least a $100,000 daily balance or execute at least 30 trades per quarter, you can be part of Ally Invest SELECT.
The one tiny perk that I care about is lower fees: $3.95 per equity trade and $0.50 per options contract.
Other perks that I don’t personally care about right now:
Priority routing to our Ally Invest reps. No additional cost when you place a phone trade. We’ll waive the first six months’ advisory fees for any new Ally Invest Advisors account you open, including custodial and joint accounts or IRAs. No fees on requests for 1099s, paper statements, or trade confirmations. We’ll refund transfer fees on deposits of $5,000 or more to your Ally Invest Securities account.
I’d trade a few of those benefits for free trades, really.
Observations this quarter
- Dividends income this past quarter (April through June): $941.20. If nothing changes, we’ll see about $2600 in dividend income this year.
- I love COST and Costco loves me! For a second year in a row, they’ve paid out a special dividend at $7 per share. Delicious dividends, that can go on to buy more dividend bearing stocks.
- For two days, I had a triple dividend from KO but it turns out that was just a dirty trick.
- I was surprised to realize that I’ve been buying more stocks in the “Cyclical Consumer Goods & Services” sector than anything else. Probably not a good idea to be concentrated in retail if I’m worried about a recession.
Year to Date Dividends: $1,365.20, Fees: $9.90, Net: $1,355.30
Income Replacement
For perspective, I like to think of the dividends investing project in terms of how much of our income it can replace, or how much of our fixed expenses it can cover.
At a whopping $1355.30, this year’s dividends can pay 39% of one new mortgage payment. Our old mortgage payment would have been paid in full!
Since I started 6 years ago, I’ve made a grand total of $2,810.00.
:: How did your portfolio do this quarter? Would you try to replace income this way, or do you have another preference?
July 24, 2017
Maybe this would be more seasonally appropriate for Thanksgiving but it’s true now, and it’s never a bad time to remember the good things.
Driving home from another four hour trip to the home supplies store, that teleprompter style list of all the work still ahead of me started scrolling.
1:56 pm.
Seamus needed dinner, a walk, his medications.
My work was piled up, the work that I had done little more about than shake a cranky stick at it in stolen minutes between bathroom vanity specs and researching and investigating flooring samples.
My stomach rumbles. Oh yeah. Also that.
Today’s purchases need to be recorded in the now 236 row spreadsheet where every single expenditure, delivery, pick-up, and delay was logged.
Drawing a deep breath to dispel the almost inevitable surge of rage-impatience, I let it out, surprised.
Nothing. I felt nothing.
Not an empty nothing but the nothing of calm and peace.
That was as weird as a new sore tooth – or the absence of pain. That’s when it dawned on me. I wasn’t irritated or grumpy or angry at the loss of half a day and interruption to my beloved routine. I was grateful.
I am grateful that all my hard choices and sacrifices to prove myself in a traditional work place up to now meant that I could have my days interrupted like this, that my career wouldn’t suffer from a temporary dislocation in my work routine. That my reputation was solid enough and my work relationships were strong enough up and down the hierarchy that if an email wasn’t answered in four minutes, no one was going to micromanage me over it.
That freedom was paid for in hard coin. Years of almost thankless toil in various corporate and non corporate jobs. Years of taking risks, pressing for well deserved promotions, negotiating for raises, knowing that women are punished for asking, then pushing forward to new ventures without being quite sure of the future.
Now? The payoff. I don’t have to apologize or atone for taking the time to make my life work because I’ll still make sure the work gets done. The striving, even when it wasn’t crystal clear what the striving would be in aid of, was worth it.
It’s imperfect – of course. This isn’t easy, or fun, by any means working on the timeline we have ahead. But it’s considerably easier than if I were still doing shift work, or working for the unreasonable manager who played favorites like Russian roulette, or that manager who thought it was my professional duty to read his mind and be his best friend, confidante, and free babysitter. Until I’ve got Jean Grey’s powers and not Dark Phoenix, that will never be my job! Actually, even with Jean Grey’s powers, I decline that job.
I am grateful.
I’m grateful that I can take care of my family, that I have a family to love and care for. That I can take care of our needs under stressful circumstances. That I can do what I need to do, when I need to do it. That PiC and I are in this together and haven’t killed each other over the neverending details and decisions. That we can and have found ways to afford doing all this work without having to move in and expose our toddler to an unsafe living environment.
That our checks written in the first 3 weeks after closing have all been safely cashed without even a little bouncing: $45,000.
!!!
Labor and materials are $$$$$.
Our contractor wisely reassured me that my spending projections were correct – it will look something like an inverted pyramid. The worst of the scope creep and the labor costs are going to be in the early phases of the work. That’s when you discover terrible things lurking in your walls and foundation and roof. Once you pass the midway point, the weekly costs become less and less, until you’re just paying minimal costs at the very end to finish up.
He was also wise enough to tell me not to expect the site to look anything like a house until after the fifth or sixth week of work. At week 2.5 I felt some flutterings of we paid that much for this shell of a house?!
This too, shall pass.
:: How do you keep yourself grounded during times of stress? Does it help to remind yourself of the long term things you can be grateful for?
July 18, 2017
I had the pleasure of reading Selina Siak Chin Yoke’s first book in this series several months ago: The Women Who Breathed Two Worlds.
She invited me to read her second book in anticipation of the book’s release today. It was wonderful to be able to squeeze that in some of my rare good moments, and arrange a review and giveaway.
She was gracious enough to give us a bit of an interview, and a giveaway. We’re all winners, here!
Her first novel, The Woman Who Breathed Two Worlds, followed the the life of Chye Hoon, an incredible woman who built a business to support her family, embracing her heritage, and trying to pass that on to her own children.
This second novel picks up after Chye Hoon passes, and evoked an entirely different set of feelings as we followed a woman from the next generation, Mei Foong, through the political and cultural changes wrought by the Japanese occupation.
Selina grew up listening to family stories and ancient legends, like I did, speaking four languages, double my childhood repertoire. She always knew that some day she would write but it wasn’t until after she’d spent time as a physicist, banker and trader in London that Selina received the message loud and clear to get on with it. She was diagnosed with cancer in 2009. As she beat the cancer, she realized it was time to start writing.
I’m so glad she didn’t wait. Her first novel was nothing but an inspiration. Well, an inspiration and a touch intimidating – I’m not sure if I can do my family’s legends justice as she did hers.
Raised in Ipoh, Petaling Jaya (near Kuala Lumpur), Malaysia, Selina later went to school in Kent, England. I had some personal questions to ask her:
Q: Who was your childhood family storyteller?
A: My maternal grandmother, to whom I dedicated When the Future Comes Too Soon. She lived in another town; each time she visited I would pester her for stories. She told me a huge amount and I forgot most of the details – I have an awful memory. Fortunately, I wrote some of it down. On my last visit to my parents’ house, my mother found sheets of handwritten notes that I had made while talking to my grandmother. She told me an astonishing amount! I really wish she were alive – I think she would enjoy my books.
Q: Which stories stuck the most with you, and why, did any of them resonate enough to guide your life choices?
A: My great grandmother’s life story – that of an uneducated woman who started a business and raised children with her earnings – was fascinating because it was so unusual. She was also such a larger-than-life character: people remember being terrified of her even after seventy years! Her story did not guide my life choices, but the protagonist in my first novel is drawn from what I heard about her.
Q: What was your and your family’s relationship with money as you were growing up, a young adult, a fully fledged adult?
A: My attitudes to money and business were, in many ways, formed when I was a child. The Chinese diaspora in South-East Asia is known for its entrepreneurialism. I grew up hearing business being discussed, and I was taught the importance of both earning money and saving it. I was given a piggy bank at the age of three! But I also understood that risks presented opportunities. Many people start business in Malaysia and also invest in stocks. Because our immigrant ancestors began afresh with very little, we celebrate those who have made successes of their lives through hard work and risk-taking.
Q: I said in my first review of The Woman Who Breathed Two Worlds that this was the story I have always wanted to write but wasn’t sure how. I’ve saved several unfinished drafts. My grandmother was the woman who raised ten children, supported her village through the war, and met her grandchildren from America only a few times late in life. But her life story that I grew up hearing is part of my soul and the undisputed source of my grit. She and I lived thousands of miles apart but we had similar tempers, similar determination, and similar love of useful containers.
Was there any person in particular that, in writing the Malayan series, you felt that kind of connection to?
A: I have felt a connection to all the strong women in my family. Fortunately, there have been many and they’ve provided me with role models on which I’ve been able to base wonderful stories!
Q: In this second book, you move the lens from one strong woman boldly facing the changes in the world over to a woman of the next generation, learning her strength as she faces a changing world but, it seems she doesn’t quite grasp it until perhaps the very end. I felt so much sadness at the close of When The Future Comes Too Soon. Perhaps I would have felt them even before having children of my own, because I’d come to understand the love my mother bore for her children and how she suffered with that love. Truth be told, that sadness was the biggest reason I needed more time to write this review – I had to sit with it for some time!
Often, authors say that may have intended to take their characters one direction and find them headed in another. Did you have that sense with Mei Foong at all, or was her character consistent in your mind and the story?
A: I’m always touched when I hear how much readers are moved by the stories I’ve written. It’s absolutely true that sometimes, my characters have insisted on doing things I’d never envisaged for them! I anchor my stories on milestone events, and then I write outlines for every chapter. When a character just goes against the grain of my outline no matter what I do, I have no choice but change it. With Mei Foong, this did not happen; she stayed more or less consistent.
While you can read Book 2 without having read Book 1, I do highly recommend you try both.
Now for a chance to read it yourself – please enter to win a copy of Selina’s latest book!
WAYS TO ENTER – Please leave a comment for each item.
1. Add the book to your Want to Read shelf on GoodReads.
2. Please leave a comment sharing who your childhood storyteller was, or who you most admired in your family when growing up. Make sure that you include your name and email address with your comment so we can reach the winner.
3. Bonus! Please share this with your friends who are interested in awesome books and have them include your name with their comment as an extra entry.
Who knows, if we have enough entrants, we’ll see if we can’t negotiate a second winner. 😉
The Fine Print: The winner will be picked by a random number generator on Thursday July 27th. Entries are accepted until Wednesday July 26th, 11:59 pm PST. Open to US readers only this time, sorry international friends!
July 17, 2017
[Part 6] We’re officially the mostly apprehensive owners of a new-to-us home.
Without even taking a breath to let that sink in, we don’t have time!, we’re nose-deep in demolition and renovation work. Our final walkthrough revealed even more work that needs doing, if you can even believe that there’s yet more to do, and it’s been nothing but stress.
My credit card is melting from all the swiping, American Express’s emails about Large Purchases are tinged with a sense of alarm, and let me tell you, Mint.com is JUDGY. Yes, I know our household spending is above average!
The contractors are hard at work tearing out walls, digging out dry rot and black mold, and filtering the air with air scrubbers until it’s habitable.
Our job is collecting all the materials that we need ready for installation once the demolition dust settles. We’ve bought: kitchen appliances, kitchen cabinetry, bath tubs, plumbing fixtures, lighting – soooo much lighting, doors throughout the house, and vinyl windows. We still have to buy kitchen countertops, bath cabinetry, flooring, paints, more lighting there is no end to the lighting purchasing this will be the most well lit home in the universe, tiling, closet doors, and about 23 million other bits and bobs and joes and marks and michaels.
Everyone who isn’t paying the bills says “oh it’s great, you can get the home you wanted, just the way you wanted it!”
I think “When will this horror show be over???”
The money is flowing out so fast, even though I have the ready cash to pay the credit card bill, it’s like watching a tornado slowly rip apart my home. It’s fascinating, and terrifying, and impossible to look away. We came within $900 of my generous credit limit which has never happened before.
Our styles are clashing
For me, and partly for PiC, the worst part of the process (even worse than the spending so you know it’s bad): having to research every single thing we’re going to buy – did you know that there were so many toilets you can buy? Did you know that toilets have lids that opened automatically? Did you know how creepy it was to walk down an aisle of toilets and have them all open their lidded maws as you pass through?
And LIGHTING. Holy mackeral, lighting. PiC spent one Sunday looking at 1000 chandeliers and lamps. That’s not hyperbole. Literally, 1000 lighting options. And that’s only one of 17 research sessions.
The sheer volume is one problem. Our approaches are another.
I research a thing, find out the quality parameters, and armed with a fair amount of information, choose the three I like best and ask PiC to pick his favorite.
PiC researches a thing, researches its history, the history of its history, the entire range of possibilities that exist, he researches down to a molecular level and then presents me with a dozen choices. His way drives me crazy. My way drives him crazy.
Shockingly, we have managed to negotiate our differences with only one tiff so far.
I don’t want him to feel rushed and like he’s compromising on pieces that we both have to live with – I would hear the grumbling for the rest of our natural lives. I also don’t want to feel inundated with information, bombarded in fact, and short circuit every time someone asks me a question because it’s one question too many – some unlucky soul would eventually lose a limb, or a face to my severely compromised temper.
Solution! He is now the man in charge of all the initial research, I only have to give occasional input to steer his selections and then we finalize our choices together. I am the woman in charge of all the money: paying the bills, approving budget for each item, finding discounts and promo codes, tracking all receipts, returns, exchanges, deliveries, and arm-twisting when something goes awry.
On that note… savings!
Or at least savings on spending we had to do – not to be confused with money that we keep safe in the savings account, there to stay, grow, and flourish.
We have ordered a handful of our materials from Build.com and Houzz.com. I was skeptical at first but a friend confirmed that he’d ordered furnishings from Houzz and while it was imperfect, their customer service was good, so I was willing to give them a shot.
How I saved at Build.com: At the time of this writing, you can get 2% off at ebates or 3% cashback at MrRebates. Check both to choose the higher rebate, of course. That was stacked with a summer sale coupon code, and I asked their chat associate to give me the 5% discount from signing up for the email list which never arrived. They did me one better, assigning a discount that was equivalent to another 7% off the total.
The key here is to create your account and fill up your cart first, stay signed into your account, then hit up the sales associate. If they dig up a good discount for you, ask them to send you the link to the saved cart with the discount instead of letting them complete the order. Close the tab with your own cart, load the link and make sure it’s showing the right items and discount. Close that link, and then go to ebates/MrRebates to reopen Build.com. You should then be able to load the cart from the newly reopened Build.com to show both the discount and proceed with your purchase.
Reminder: Gratitude
Even while the money flows out like heart’s blood, here’s perspective for you: We could be in Make Smarter Decision’s boat – budgeted but without anyone to hire! We have acquaintances who have been paying double mortgages for months and still don’t have a good contractor on board. We know people who chose to manage the whole project themselves and hire the subcontractors themselves, they’re all in a world of hurt. Demand is so high that it’s not uncommon for subcontractors to walk off a job for a better paying one without a word, and they just don’t care!
Yes, we are paying big bucks for this work to be done, but at least it’s getting done. Those folks carrying double expenses have spent nearly half our budget on just owning two properties and that’s before a lick of work has been done.
:: Have you had good or bad experiences with contractors? Are you into Do-It-Yourself for home repairs and renovations? Would you splurge on the best fixtures and appliances and doo-dads if you were outfitting your forever home?
July 14, 2017
Homestyle! My insistence on making the first part of this in the tiny Le Crueset meant that I have to add a box of chicken broth which totally changed the taste.
I didn’t make that mistake with the second and third soups. Note, I’ve started making the soups smaller and simpler because my soups always turned into thick stews. Play with these proportions to get the right level of soupiness or stewiness for your taste.
Ingredients
8-10 cups of water
1 finely diced onion
2 lbs of chicken or 6 thighs/legs
1/2 cup barley
1 finely cubed carrot
1 finely cubed zucchini
Salt and pepper, to taste
Minced cilantro for garnish if that’s your thing
Directions
Remove skin and fat from bone-in chicken thighs and drumsticks. Poach the chicken for 20-25 minutes or until cooked through, then remove it to cool in a serving bowl. Strain the water into a bowl, and put it back in the pot. Set the broth to boil on low, with a dash of salt, plus diced onions and barley for another 20 minutes.
Add carrots and zucchini to the pot, cook for another 6-8 minutes on a low boil. Taste the broth and add salt and pepper if it’s needed.
In a separate pot, cook your pasta shape of choice. Our current favorite is ditalini – tiny tubes! Drain this pasta and toss with some olive oil so it doesn’t stick, set aside in a serving bowl.
Shred the cooled chicken.
Voila! Ready to serve!
Put some chicken and noodles in the bowl first, then pour the veggie soup over the top. Garnish with cilantro if you like it.
July 12, 2017
Books, books, everywhere
Did you know that some daycares let kids take books with them to their napping cots? Ours does and now JuggerBaby has to take a book, or five, to bed with zir every night.
We’ve had to set a hard limit of 2 small books for the bed lest ze fall asleep perched atop a mountain of all the books ze can carry.
Helper monkey
Amidst a really hard weekend of meltdowns, JuggerBaby turned into a most helpful creature. Once summer rolls in, Seamus’s allergies flare up, every single year and he requires twice daily feet wraps to ward off infection, calm his hot spots, and relieve his itching. It’s pathetic. This summer, though, his human sibling didn’t just try to horn in on the foot wrapping “fun” like last year when ze demanded I “yap feet!” for zir to look just like Brother. This year, ze is more advanced and less self centered. When ze spotted me closely examining his feet, ze loudly announced that Brother had “ows!” and ran to bring me the first aid kit, his treats, and generally made zirself useful by hovering closely and giving him treats as I worked.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say he appreciated it but he didn’t hate the treats.
Just one bite
JuggerBaby still has terrible table manners – frequently trying to steal off PiC’s plate; depositing rinds, peels and cobs on my plate like it’s zir mobile compost bin; randomly overstuffing zir mouth with one food only to chew it and spit it out because you stupidly offered zir something else to eat next. Next can’t come too soon for this toddler. We’ve learned our lesson – never ever offer zir anything new when that mouth is full.
The one thing that’s gone well is ze is still open to new foods and tastes. Even if ze doesn’t think ze will like it at first, occasionally refusing foods on the basis of I don’t wanna, ze is still willing to give anything a single bite trial. We tell zir often: just try one bite. If you don’t like it, then swallow that bite but you don’t have to eat any more.
I’m positive that wouldn’t have worked on me, but it’s perfect for zir. Ze has often rejected food out of hand, mostly out of pique. The dawning realization that this pancake/salmon/pickle is awesome is followed by a delighted “I LIKE it!!!”
Success.
Perhaps my proudest moment was serving a totally new dinner of grilled salmon, rice with mixed veggies, and broccolini the other night. Ze has eaten all these food types before but I’ve never served this meal. With zero fuss over the food, ze cleaned zir plate and asked to try the arugula quinoa salad too. Though ze returned a half chewed arugula leaf to me, “I don’t like it”, I can’t blame zir. Peppery leaves? Why??
Ze has come around on the notion of cake, too. Last year, cake was strange and distasteful. This year, we can’t get enough of it!
I wonder if this will be consistent into zir older years. I recall being very adventurous when I didn’t know better, eating fertilized eggs and jellyfish and other interesting native culture foods. Never durian, though, that stuff is a taunt from hell. As an adult, though, I’ve had to actively push myself to try new things like beets and kale and parsnips, or give previously despised foods a chance like yogurt and tomatoes.
Precious #parenting moments
- JB: I want yoom.
Me: Broom?
JB: Ya. Yooom.
- Me: Did you just suck the butter off the green bean, then give it back???
JB: Yes!
Me: …… just … go.
JB: JUST GOOOOO!!!
- From across the room: *thunk* Ow. *thunk* Ow. *thunk* Ow. *thunk* Ow. *thunk* Ow. *thunk* Ow.
Me: JB?
JB: Mama?
Me: Stop hitting yourself?
JB: *thunk*
- PiC: Want to share a banana?
JB: Yes!
PiC: Here. Have a bite.
JB: My ‘nana. Dadda get own ‘nana.
- Me: Go wash your hands.
JB: I wait my toon.
Me: ? It is your turn.
JB: MAMA WASH, I WAIT TURN!
:: How was your palate as a kid? Is it better or worse in adulthood?
July 10, 2017
On Money
Income
Our normal income comes from two full time day jobs.
We experiment with earning money on the side, including minimal cash flow that we don’t touch from an investment property and investing in dividend stocks.
Some side income comes from Swagbucks, selling clothes on Poshmark which is hit or miss, and tracking activity through Achievement (my introduction to it).
The long term goal is to replace our day job income before my health declines and prevents me from working.
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