My kids and notes: 9.3
May 21, 2024
Life with JB
Taking a moment to be grateful that JB genuinely enjoys working at the two activities we signed them up for years ago. I don’t have the (strong) urge to yell “do your best!” after them when they leave the house. I already know they will (for varying levels of “best” day to day). I do have to occasionally point out ways they’re needing to improve or commit a bit more, like, taking opportunities to face a challenging exercise even if you’re not going to be good at it at first.
We picked them for safety (swim and self defense) and for health (cardio!), and hoped for the best on the interest front. They would likely have enjoyed anything we picked because they’ve always had a wide array of interests, but it’s still something I am grateful for because we don’t have to fight with them to do the thing.
It offsets my awareness that wants to be guilt that we didn’t actually let them pick their activities. But it occurs to me that we probably will in the future when they’re old enough to make decisions like whether they want to continue with these and on a recreational or competitive level. I hadn’t thought of that before because they don’t have that autonomy yet, but it is striking how many parents here expect their kids, and then push their kids, to be specialists starting from a very young age. I didn’t even start having activities until junior high. But they were the activities that I wanted to do and so I tried my hardest at them.
Talking through the possibility of future sports for Smol Acrobat with a friend, I did feel a twinge of almost guilt? that we will attempt to take one path of least resistance and offer them the same activities as JB in an attempt to streamline life a bit. It’s the same proto-guilt that I feel about not letting them add more than two activities to their schedule: I want to give them more choices BUT my anti-desire to be stuck in the all-consuming trap of life revolving around the kids’ activities is much stronger.
Life with Smol Acrobat
When they’re in a good mood, they’re cute as a bug. They like to flip back and forth between play-emotions: I’m so SAD. *frowns, furrows brow* (I’m sorry you’re sad!) Oh! I’m happpyyyy!!! *big smile* (Yay I’m glad you’re happy!).
I picked up Duolingo again for the first time in several years and Smol Acrobat is surprisingly interested in it so I let them do lessons with me on the condition that they try to learn, too. They are practicing to speak bits and pieces as we work through lessons, and loves pushing the buttons for me (with help since obviously they can’t read). They CAN hear the differences in the spoken words, though, and they’re highly entertained by the whole thing. Both kids are, actually, but Smol Acrobat is the one who has begun to make ME repeat after them purely for their own entertainment: Mom, say: con. duc. tor! Conductor! Is a big word! Mom, say ex. ting. ish! Exting-ish! is a big word!
Pupdate
What a terrible month, in a terrible year. Early in the month, Sera suffered an infection that was really hard on her body, as was fighting it off. We made it through that only for her to relapse, badly. The hospital stay helped get her back on her feet, just enough to establish that the disorder had become so severe, there was nothing else that we could do for her. Nothing humane, anyway. We could take extreme measures and we could whip up a new cocktail of medications but none of them had a high likelihood of disease mitigation and they all had a high likelihood of introducing new complications so in the end, it was a simple (but not easy) decision. We brought her home for whatever time we could share before saying a proper goodbye when her symptoms returned. It was an awful week but I’m grateful we knew that it was our last, unbelievably unbearably hard, days together.
Her balance this year: $11,700.
Precious Moments
Smol Acrobat accidentally headbutted me really hard in the face and exclaimed: sawwy! Sawwy!
Still wincing, I hadn’t responded yet, so they anxiously prodded: I said sawwy! Say “it’s ok little cat”??
*****
JB recounting their impromptu game with their younger friend: I electric shocked him three times, he should be dead!
But, he’s Bowser today, isn’t he? I didn’t think Bowser could be electroshocked?
Yeah he can, I shocked his belly! It’s soft! Zzziiippp! Then I made him barf and then I sliced him up into tiny turtle parts!
*blink* ….. That’s …. that’s a strategy.
*****
Mommy, I want to play jump rope with you.
Ok, how do you want to play with two people?
You hold dis and you do DIS. You’re not enough bigger so I do dis. *flails wildly*
Yes… I see….
*****
We’ve (mostly me) been trying to suss out Smol Acrobat’s understanding of Sera’s passing. At first, they just said “Sewa is at de doctuh’s” thinking that she was hospitalized again. A few days later, they told me “Sewa … went to another pwace …. to stay….” I don’t really expect them to comprehend it yet but I want to keep checking in and keeping her memory alive.
I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer on number of activities. We only have so many hours in a day. (That said, I do think learning how to swim enough to not die if they fall in the water is important.)
nicoleandmaggie recently posted…RBOC
Yeah I have a personal wrong number, I know it’s going to vary from family to family and time of life and all that. I just hate my personal limitations. Someday I will make my peace with that!