By: Revanche

My kids and notes: Year 10.4

August 13, 2025

Life with JB

It’s really a shame that the kiddo JB spends the most time with comes from a family where the parents are clearly in a shitty relationship. The mom is very sweet and kind but the dad is pure crap. She’s always trying to be complimentary about him but the amount of effort, all her softening language, and what she ends up sharing all tell me is that she’s been making excuses for him to herself and others for a very long time. She clearly doesn’t hear herself. “He loves the kids but he doesn’t want to spend time with them” can’t possibly add up to “he’s a good dad.” I don’t see how he can be if he only likes to spend time with their pictures, won’t parent, actively undermines the person who IS parenting them right in front of the kids, and also voted for Trump. That last one consigns him to the asshole bin completely, in my book. Though he was already there with all the other things.

All that to say I don’t ever want JB at their house because I don’t trust that guy one micrometer. PiC is in full agreement. I don’t know how long we can hold that off though. Kiddo is very welcome at ours and always has been perfectly well behaved, and I know they want JB to come to theirs too. But. No.

Were you ever banned from going to anyone’s house growing up (was the reason ever clear to you)? Or been the banning parent/guardian/responsible party?

Life with Smol Acrobat

Smol Acrobat has been so difficult and moody whenever they don’t get their way. It’s especially rough in the mornings when they really don’t want to have to get up, get dressed, go pee, brush their teeth, eat breakfast, or leave.

I know we went through this with JB sometime during Years 2-4. I remember specifically grumbling about how impossible mornings were with them and I know we got through it – mostly because time passed and they changed. But wow is it hard to figure out how to motivate this kid to get going some days. One morning telling them that they were showing me sloth mode, “show me hummingbird mode!” worked. But most tricks really only work once.

****

After an offhanded mention from an autistic friend, which I thought was brilliant, I’ve been loading the utensils by group for two months. Maybe three. SmolAc’s job is to unload the utensils, they do this 2-3 times a week. They’ve JUST noticed: Hey! Forks wif forks on one side, spoons on de other side!
YUP.

****

The trouble with anthropomorphizing the kid’s giraffe flosser is that SOMETIMES you grip the thing wrong and right in the middle of the giraffe grappling with the germs and the gingivitis prevention, you snap the giraffe’s neck. O_O

Precious Moments

SmolAc to their cake: Dis wooks dewishious. I’m going to eat you. Ok? Ok!
SmolAc to me: It said “ok!”

****

SmolAc: I wish I could take a shower first and den play.
Me: Well, if you ate your dinner quickly and showered quickly, you would still have time to.
SmolAc: Well! I have a lot of questions.
Me: About what?
SmolAc: About work and school.
Me: And that’s why you eat slowly?
SmolAc: yes.
Me: ….. Welp. Ok.

****

SmolAc, curiously: Maybe when I’m very very old, wike you, den can I do dat too?

****

SmolAc: Da water is hot but dat is ok, I like hot showers. I want it very warm. When I was three, I didn’t. Or two. Or one. One, I was a baby.

****

SmolAcrobat is angling for a sleepover: I want to sleep wif someone who is ten. LIKE JB!
PiC: I’m 10!
SmolAc: No you’re not! You’re 209!
SmolAc to me: how old are you?
Me: I don’t know, how old am I?
SmolAc: Fifteen hundred!

No wonder they keep saying I’m “really really old”.