October 9, 2008
It’s kind of a grown up sort of clutch, that is. It’s the softest leather I have ever felt! Standing tall at 5 inches high, 12 inches long and 2 inches wide, I feel like I can go to night functions like an adult with a real purse now.
September 12, 2008
This isn’t about my complete lack of cooking ability, not this time. It’s about what to do for a good friend who has been extraordinarily good to me and BF’s family. She’s been above and beyond for them so long that I don’t think that they even realize that what she does IS extraordinary anymore.
I do, though.
Recently, she’s been coaching, encouraging, and uplifting me in every way during some very tough times. She calls to check on my progress, devoted an entire day to helping me do research, given me career advice, listened to my stories and offered great analysis and suggestions. She’s also done the best thing I could ever have asked for: she’s tough on me. She doesn’t let me make rookie mistakes when I’m upset to avoid hurting my feelings, she gives me a firm shake whenever she thinks it’s necessary. And I’m so grateful to her for it all.
So, really, a dinner just isn’t good enough. Taking her out to a fancy schmancy dinner would be nice, but it’s not good enough. I ought to mention that she was a highly successful businesswoman for many years and can afford to spend in a year more than I earn, saved and am worth! ;P I admire her financial savvy so very much, but it does sort of make it a little more difficult to figure out what to do for her or get for her.
My gift giving instinct tells me that I need to dig deeper to figure out what would make her life easier, something that’s a gift of time and love, not money. I’m not concerned with spending “enough,” just that it conveys how very much I love and appreciate her.
Any suggestions would be appreciated, meanwhile I’m going to meditate on it.
January 22, 2008
It’s a good thing I was so well prepared for R’s wedding gifts.
I paid for her bridal shower gifts using my hoarded Victoria’s Secret gift cards. No coupons to use there, but I did find everything on sale.
For the actual wedding gifts, I redeemed a $100 Macy’s gift card from my Thank You points last month, used a great all-purpose “11% off anything in the store” Macy’s coupon from my business trip in September, and bought three gifts from her registry for a total of $60 after coupon.
And the lady handed me back the coupon, which doesn’t expire until March 31st, back. š I have an extra one, so if anyone wants it, shoot me an email!
A few weeks ago, I read up on wedding gift etiquette, it’s a pretty hot topic on some wedding forums, and learned a few things that seemed contradictory:
1. Guests usually send upon receipt of their invitation, and have up to 1 year after the wedding to send a gift.
2. The bride and groom, however, are not supposed to talk about their registries in the invitation.
So … how do the guests who may not be very close to the bride and groom find out about the registries? I understand that it’s bad form to actively solicit gifts, but is it really preferable to send your guests on a scavenger hunt to find someone who’s in the know? And is it fair to the organizing person who is inevitably fielding a dozen wedding-related calls a day to have to return another dozen calls with a recitation of the registry stores? I can tell you I got pretty tired of getting the calls and texts asking, hey, where are they registered (again!)? There’s got to be a compromise somewhere in there.
3. The guests are not obligated to give gifts that are equal to the value of their plates.
Culturally this is a little funny for me, because that’s exactly the rule of thumb of gift giving in our community. You give at least what your plate probably cost, based on $50 increments, and much more if you’re family or close friends. And even more if you’re immediate family to either bride or groom. My parents, back in the day, gave my mom’s siblings from seven hundred dollars to a thousand dollars as their gift alone, and that doesn’t include paying for part of the wedding. Ma’s the oldest, so it was expected.
In R’s case, though, I didn’t feel obligated to calculate proper return on the cost of our plates because I’d done so much work, and spent so much on all the pre-wedding stuff, that the gift itself pales in comparison. Not to toot my own horn, but I was at that girl’s beck and call, and was darn good emotional support through some pretty tough nights! I was there for her, dangit! š
I also didn’t feel awkward about being creative in financing her gifts. After all, she still got things she liked from her registry, and it doesn’t hurt her at all that I didn’t go into debt for it.
December 21, 2007
Hooboy, I knew that office would be the death of my budget.
We were given Apple iPhones for Christmas. *sigh* It looks ridiculously awesome. It’s shiny, and lovely, and the thought was so very generous. Breathtaking, really. I mean, an iPhone! Not one of us in there could ever have afforded one on our own. But …. there’s a good reason for that.
Upkeep and Maintenance is Unaffordable
I have T-Mobile. My current plan ROCKS. 1000 minutes, and 400 text/picture messages costs $45 a month, and the text messaging is my little splurge. I normally use it to the fullest.
The closest equivalent for just the basic phone and text messenging is 900 minutes and 200 text messages for a total of $60+$10 = $70 pre-tax. That’s half the messages for twice the price, by the way. This doesn’t include any data plans, either. And of course, what’s the point of having an iPhone and no data plan? Well, I’ve lived without it this long, so I don’t consider it essential. I’m just calculating all potential costs.
First Generation Technology is Usually Terrible
I’ve never wanted any first line products because it’s usually got all sorts of bugs and is upgraded within about twelve months, anyway. I don’t like being a technology guinea pig; I lack the necessary tech-geek genes that make me all starry-eyed over brand-spankin’-new to the public gadgets.
Having done my research …
I’m fighting hard to be a gracious gift recipient while resisting the pull of glamorous lifestyle inflation. After all, how gracious will I be when I’m broke after paying bills every month?
1. I can get a 14% discount through my university for AT&T phone plans. I hope it applies to iPhone plans .. they seem to have a lockdown on all kinds of iPhone related discounts. (Meaning, there aren’t any!)
2. I could possibly get the plan through one of those Asian stores that give you a bonus on just activating a plan without taking a phone. I’ve never used them before, but a friend of a friend might be able to help me out.
3. The office has offered to pay my early termination fee, and for any skin or case or holster that I want. Also, they’ll pay for an extra travel charger since I’m neurotic about leaving my one and only charger at home on business trips.
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