July 17, 2020

Good Thing Friday (74)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1589.82; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. PiC had the opportunity to do a fun social active thing both days this weekend with friends. Since it’s the safest thing he can do by nature of the activity that forces them to be something like ten feet or more apart, it seemed like a great idea for him to do both days instead of just picking one as he normally would have. He had fun!

2. JB and I had a little less fun but I very deliberately set my expectations incredibly low. Gauging how I felt Saturday when I woke up, I proactively decided we’d do chores half the morning and watch TV for half the morning. Normally that’s not on the menu at all, it’s just a treat. But it was good. JB got their chores done in record time without whining. I got a bunch of administrative crap out of the way and that felt good. PiC got much wanted social time.

Lest that seem unfair, there’s really no one super local I can safely and easily hang out with so I keep in touch with my people via text, tweet, or email. I’m pretty set on the socializing front.

Sunday was similar, I destressed the day from the get go by planning for it to be a “lazy” day. I ended up knocking off a whole list of things I had to do because I was too achy to be up and about doing chores, JB was instructed to do some quiet activities and they did so, and mostly things went well.

3. Spendy but good. Our toaster oven called it quits on us this week and we use that thing 3 or 4 times every day, so we had to replace it. I picked a digital combo air fryer and toaster oven because I’ve been yearning to do air frying but adamantly against adding yet another appliance to our countertops. A combo situation was the only way I’d be willing to get myself a fryer. We’re giving it a test run, I hope this is the one!

4. Little treats: I adored these Fairydrop mushroom cards from Redbubble. The quality was great and I am really feeling like that angry mushroom these days.  As I’m not black I can’t use them myself, but I could (and did) gift them to a friend who can. I’m swooning from the cuteness of Pikaole’s Redbubble shop but given Seamus’s emergency and our other purchases this month, I will have to wait a bit before I shop again.

Challenges this week: The school district’s reopening plan was a steaming pile of terrible. And then we were told to decide what we’re going to do in a week with very little information. We have the WORST President and Education Secretary, Betsy DeVos. We spent a whole day this week tending to Seamus’s almost-emergency situation that was, thankfully, not quite at the emergency level we thought it could have reached. I’m glad we spent the day working on that because it can very easily tip over to the Actual Emergency and Serious Consequences zone, still can if he doesn’t respond to this treatment plan, but at least we have a chance.

5. I feel bad that I couldn’t make the time to spread the net wider but a group of us pitched in to support the vaunted Sandy (of Yes, I am Cheap fame) as she moves the Elevate Conference online and I’m really happy that we were able to come together this way for her and members of our PF community. The conference looks like it’s going to be fantastic and I’m so excited to sit in on some of the sessions.

6. Sera finally stopped vomiting after 3 days, thankfully. It was just a run of the mill bug because absolutely everything else was fine and she most definitely had an appetite the entire time. I was grateful that if she had to be nauseated and vomiting a few times a day, she usually came to tell us when it was time to go out. That’s an improvement over horking on the thick pile rug.

:: How was your week? What would make next week better?

July 10, 2020

Good Thing Friday (73)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1589.82; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. Taking a real three day weekend with only the bare minimum of work rarely happens at the best of times but I did it this holiday weekend and it was positively restorative to have three whole days of not frantically juggling work, parenting, dog-momming, cleaning, and household management and and and and … but there was still some stress over the not working part because I knew I’d be hit hard on Monday.

2. We carefully explored a nearby trail, JB hit the road on their bike with great enthusiasm, and I was foolish enough to push myself to a greater distance than my body was ready for. Fresh air yay, feeling decrepit afterwards boo. JB wore themselves out so thoroughly they even took an afternoon nap which hasn’t happened in months.

3. We had take out this weekend just because I wanted it. That’s unusual. I rarely (never?) let myself have a treat like that solely because I wanted it and without a whole lot of justification. It was delicious! We enjoyed it with the first act of Hamilton. JB watching it at age 5 is very different from JB rocking out to the tunes at age 2. There were so many questions.

4. A friend’s child is turning two this month and I already had some clothes set aside so, though we really don’t typically do birthday gifts, I had something on hand to surprise them with a little mail… at some point. I have to make a decision

Challenges this week: Seamus is going through yet another health crisis and it requires my attention four times a day. We received notice that our tenants may have to relocate for their jobs soon which would be a bit of a blow right now. We only just got them in and started filling in the massive financial hole created by the last tenants. Fingers crossed they aren’t going to leave soon.

I’ve been hanging on by the skin of my teeth at work for a few weeks now and that feeling has bled into my personal life. I haven’t been present mentally for an important milestone for a dear friend and I feel like an absolute heel about it. I don’t have the energy to check in and talk at length with our loved one going through health challenges, I feel like a heel about that. I can just about keep up with the goings on with the loved one struggling to escape abuse and I feel like a heel about THAT. Intellectually I know it’s not reasonable to expect to be able to give fully of myself to everyone at all times but I still feel like a terrible friend right now.

5. JB wrote out a wedding card message all on their own for a friend who is going to tie the knot in less than ideal circumstances. I liked that initiative.

:: How was your week? What would make next week better?

July 3, 2020

Good Thing Friday (72)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1589.82; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. While I was grumpy that I’d miscalculated the sizes of the storage bins I should use for my office, I’m taking it as a win that I actually finally started up my organization project in a real way.

The wrong size bins were repurposed as underbed storage for JB now, which has been solely needed as their games and puzzles have undergone a population boom, and that was a really nice secondary effect.

2. I took a first stab at making my own gluten free fish sticks. They were just average, but they weren’t terrible either.

3. My massive cleaning effort unearthed my ancient Nintendo DS and eventually the charging cord too. SCORE.

Challenges this week: My pain decided to flare up big time again after going quiescent for about a minute.

4. The four perpetual box-occupants of my office have been an embarrassment for the past two years. I finally emptied one out!

5. Our local donations charity has begun pick-ups again so I’m going to start pulling together a big box for them. I have this feeling I should have already had this ready, considering all the time we’ve had since they last did pickups, but that’s ignoring, ohhh everything ELSE about life during this period. Getting a pick up together for next week would be plenty.

:: How was your week? What would make next week better?

June 26, 2020

Good Thing Friday (71)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1589.82; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. I muttered a bit about JB stealing my intended napping nest on the sofa. They came to apologize and offered me a consolation pig stuffy to cuddle instead. I notice they didn’t offer to trade back but this was good too.

2. I think JB’s most motivated to do chores when I’m down and out. I was hurting pretty bad and needed to lay down, and I heard them clinking around in the kitchen. They were setting the table for dinner without being asked.

The best hilarious part was that we had run out of clean plates so they carefully selected the cleanest of the dirty plates in matching sizes from the dishwasher to reuse. They do know how to wash dishes but I normally don’t let them wash the bigger plates since they get so slippery so this was the best compromise they could come up with.

3. I sorted out a work tangle that’s been bothering me for weeks! It was a headache and stressful but I have a good grip on it now so I think it’ll be ok once I smooth out the rough edges.

4. In a burst of motivation, I plotted some organizing for my office. It does involve buying some storage which I’ve been avoiding but I think I have a handle on how to do it without spending a lot. And of course, cashback from Mr. Rebates.

Challenges this week: We nearly lost a very dear family member this week. I’m so glad the doctors were able to save them but it was incredibly scary. Things on the cancer and abusive spouse fronts have also been very bad so it’s been a hell of a lot of support or attempts at support from afar.

:: How was your week? What would make next week better?

June 19, 2020

Good Thing Friday (70)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1,570.70; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. I redeemed $10 in PayPal money from Achievement and $25 from Bing search rewards. Still waiting, Achievement!

2. We reached my increased savings goal of one year of basic expenses for both our home and the rental. Woo! Previously I would have just made myself be patient and let the rental income cover itself but those reserves were more than wiped out during the refresh and with COVID, it just made sense to put up our own cash as a buffer just in case. If we don’t need it later, great, but I’d rather have it to cover the mortgage in case the tenants need assistance than not. I can breathe a little easier financially after I do a final accounting of how much the rental owes me and how much it needs to build up its own buffer.

3. For the first time since this pandemic started, I felt like a halfway decent parent with the energy and the desire to take JB on a little mom-kid adventure on the weekend. Nothing fancy, we just walked to a safe empty space for them to play. But that much has been beyond me for months. The burden has been entirely on PiC to do all the outdoorsing and I had begun to despair that I would ever feel even close to normal again. I know it won’t stick for long but I’m very glad for the moment.

Challenges this week: In a seemingly endless game of “Pandemic Stress vs Diet?”, my joints flared up so badly I couldn’t raise my arms or use my wrist for a couple days. Friend’s cancer diagnosis is on the Very Not Good end of the spectrum.
4. I cooked a tofu and ground turkey scramble that got two thumbs up from everyone. I even got to enjoy it twice before stress appetite shut that down.

5. PiC has had some great luck with picking out tasty fruit on his re-supply adventures. Except for that one mealy peach. Yuck. But mostly we’ve been fortunate to eat lots of fresh fruit.

:: How was your week?

June 12, 2020

Good Thing Friday (69)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1,570.70; Rural libraries, $321.62.


1. While my personal diet has been terrible, stress tummies are a thing, PiC and JB have been eating a whole lot more fruit than before. PiC continues to do all the grocery shopping and is doing a lot more food prep now that our time commitments are balanced differently.

2. I haven’t been able to cook lately for weird appetite reasons, they come in waves, so it was really nice to be able to make a dinner this week. Bonus: JB called it a super special dinner. Double bonus but also a normal one: PiC cleaned the whole kitchen after. He always does clean up whether or not he cooks but it’s just something I appreciate every time.

Challenges this week: We can’t let the protests just fall by the wayside. There is a lot more fighting to do before we have accomplished anything real. A dear friend has cancer and it is advanced enough for us to be SERIOUSLY concerned. I keep overcommitting to causes I care about and then wondering why I feel stretched too thin. Well, duh. It’s mostly fundraising related organizing but it’s more than time to be sensible when there’s a lot to complete on my current commitments. I have resolved for the umpteenth time that I’m not allowed to pick up or start ANY new projects at all until the end of summer. You’d think a planner personality would know when they were taking on too much.

3. Some spreadsheet mistakes rankled but I tracked down most of them and reconciled the final missing $5 out of pocket and considered that a worthwhile trade for not spending the time tracking it down. It’s all for a good cause anyway.

4. A wonderful story about Highlights reminded me how much I loved the magazine growing up and how I would have loved getting a subscription. We can afford it (especially during a sale) so I’m ordering a one year subscription for JB to see if they enjoy it too. If you wanted to order a magazine subscription from them today, use this code for 10% off: Flash10

5. On a day when neither of us knew WTF to make for dinner, we manage to heat up a frozen GF pizza, make GF pasta Alfredo from scratch (the three ingredient kind, not the heavy cream kind) and a summer salad of spinach, strawberries, green apples and toasted walnuts. It was nowhere near low carb but I’m just too tired to be coming up with palatable GF low carb no sugar meals these days. We need to eat something. Turns out brown rice pasta Alfredo pretty much seems like….Mac and cheese. It earned two thumbs up from the Mac and cheese aficionado.

6. I figured out that I don’t need to set up a meal train for friends dealing with radiation and chemo, I can just order food for them from us and call it a day. We’re testing out Goldbelly which is more of a splurgey type site but it gives us access to a lot more options than I’ve been able to find in single meal format rather than a commitment to multiple deliveries weekly. I’ve sent these friends plenty of meals in the past for convalescence and it was always a lot of work coordinating with those healthy food delivery places. Healthy options are harder to find here but it’s the happier medium between delicious food they’ll have to cook (Zingermans) and delivery services that may be overwhelming with frequency and coordination requirements. I had to know when they’d be home three times a week for several weeks last time. Not as easy as you’d think.

June 5, 2020

Good Thing Friday (68)

If you’d like to join me in helping Lakota families and/or rural libraries this year, please read this post. Over 6 weeks in 2019, we raised $2669.94 for the Lakota families, touching 27 lives. What can we do in 2020?

Current total: Lakota, $1,570.70; Rural libraries, $321.62.


Challenges this week: The world is on fire, quite literally, and here I thought that COVID would be our biggest issue for the next several months. The racism in our country, and the systemic refusal to change, is breathtaking, devastating, heartbreaking.

Protests and riots were inevitable given how little this country has done to move away from murdering black people and then blaming them for their own deaths. I will never understand why our government prefers to arrest thousands and murder more people instead of arresting the police officers who murdered a man in cold blood. Never. My heart keeps getting heavier for our friends and family who are hurting and living through traumas we should not be putting them through.

It feels wrong to even be thinking of utterly mundane, petty, good things when this is happening to our fellow citizens, to our friends, to our neighbors. When my dearest friends and mentors know they can’t even be safe in their own beds, in their own homes.

But as I was thinking when Ursula Vernon said something similar – we also need good too. We can’t stay steeped in the anger continuously, indefinitely. We need to act and support people who are being hurt but we also need to recharge. I hate it, though.

More people need to listen to Jane Elliott and think on why they are so quick to find ways to excuse how Jane Elliot: “If you, as a White person, would be happy to receive the same treatment that our Black citizens do in this society, please stand.”we treat our Black citizens: “That says very plainly that you know what’s happening, you know you don’t want it for you, I want to know why you’re so willing to accept it or allow it to happen for others.” Another interview about her exercise with her brown eyed and blue eyed third grade students where she found that bigotry is a learned behavior.

The mundane challenges: PiC’s job changes started a couple weeks ago and as predicted, have been increasingly difficult to manage with no childcare. We will figure it out, we’re working on it, but time is tighter, tempers are a bit more fragile, and we’re all even more tired.

The mundane good things

1. I’ve been hoarding quite a few gift cards for pricey stores that we don’t frequent for years. I finally pulled them out to solve some of my problems around the house: I need a really heavy duty knife for cutting through bones (my catfish has to be cut into steaks) – time for a cleaver! We could also really some placemats but

2. AH HA. I don’t love buying from Houzz but PiC picked out a couple things he needed for a house project several weeks ago. By the time I got around to ordering them, the prices had gone up. But I noticed that there was a sale in another department entirely so my suspicion was that they had increased the prices elsewhere to make up for their sale in case they had people there for the sale and also picking up other things at more than full price. I backburnered the order until that sale was over and voila! The prices came back down the day after that sale ended.

3. I’ve been fighting with my phone that keeps making files available offline FOREVER. I would turn off “available offline” and then they would pop up with the dratted notification the “5 files are available offline” again! It was maddening! I finally found the solution. I only actively use the Sheets app, so forgot all about the other apps that I never use. I went through the Docs app and the Drive app to turn off all the files available offline there too, and I think … that has solved the problem. *Spoke too soon? Another file started coming up as available online even though I didn’t have it marked to be. Sigh. Restarting the phone helped. I might have to cave and update the phone system.

:: How are you doing?

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