March 1, 2022
On Money
Income
Our primary income comes from our full time jobs. We have minimal income from investing in index funds and dividend stocks (all reinvested). We earn money on the side to supplement our main incomes. We get a bit of income from Swagbucks, cash back sites (Rakuten, Mr.Rebates) and affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon sometimes pay a micro-commission to keep the blog running. There are ways to support the blog and our charitable giving in the sidebar.
Our long term goal is to replace our day job income with passive income before my health prevents me from working. I know from my Mom’s experience that qualifying for or relying on disability is incredibly tough or near impossible here in CA. Aside from that, I aim to do my best to make the most of what we can do while we can.
***
Dividend income. We received $911.31 in dividends from the stocks portfolio. February is always a big month for dividends and they’re always reinvested. Eventually this nest egg will grow enough to cover more than one month of our expenses, per year.
(more…)
February 8, 2022
Feelings
As I was gently tickling a crying Smol, checking them for anything that was poking them or otherwise making them physically uncomfortable, JB scolded me: Mom, they’re sad. Don’t try to cheer them up if they’re sad!
This came from a conversation we had about how it’s ok for people to be sad and they don’t need to be jollied out of it. They just need to be allowed to have their moment of sadness and to let it pass in their own time. I had to explain that there’s a difference between having sad feelings, which are fine, and being sad because something physically doesn’t feel good that can be fixed. For babies, we’re responsible for figuring out the latter, but as they get older, we’ll be responsible for recognizing the former.
*****
JB was instructed to put away laundry and of course, even with the motivation of opening reserved gifts if they finished the entire chore instead of just the half they were assigned at first (it should go without saying that it should be without whining), they were FULL of dramatics. They don’t specifically whine about the task because they know they can’t get away with that. So instead they dramatically exclaim over and over when they do something asinine like overload one side of the laundry basket and it pitches over. Six. Times. Six freaking times. Six times we hear the basket tip over and a loud exclamation. I can’t say how utterly grating it is to hear them being extra dramatic as an equally irritating alternative to whining. And then we lose it and they lose their incentive and then it’s all tears and grouchiness and arghhhhh. I can see why some parents don’t bother to have their kids take on responsibility. It’s a right pain in the caboose. But we’re not going to give up just because this is like nails on a chalkboard. We endure. In bad moods, but we endure.
Life with Smol Acrobat
We are DONE WITH FORMULA. I have shaken my last bottle of formula for this baby! *Snoopy dance*
I have been so ready to be done with making up formula bottles. The mess, the “finish in one hour after starting” calculations, the waste when Smol decided after a taste that they weren’t hungry after all and refused to be hungry until one hour and five minutes after contaminating that first bottle we can’t use anymore.
We’ve been offering all kinds of solids since they were 6 months and they’re just now making the mental shift of preferring to fill up on solids rather than milk. Some days they still don’t want food, though.
Here’s a weird thing: they like cold food and warm milk. Can’t reverse them. It’s so strange. Feed them a bite of warm bread and they grimace like it’s bitter. Give them a bottle of cold milk and it’s BRAIN FREEZE CITY. But cold food straight from the fridge? Divine. Warm milk? Perfection.
We’re working on it. They’re slowly loosening their grip on these convictions. Our next thing is to convince them that milk IS permitted in non bottle containers. Like sippy cups. Their firm belief is that that sippy cups are only for water. They’re happy with any sippy but it MUST contain water.
Speaking of food progress, I keep forgetting that Smol has Rules. Any new food to be introduced must be the TINIEST of bites. They’re more willing to try new foods now but the first bite must always be nearly microscopic so they can check for poison. Large bites are accepted and then immediately dribbled down their front in the most disgusting possible way to teach this lesson.
Also, some foods must be hand fed, some spoon fed, others fork fed, some self fed and you have to figure out which is which purely by process of food being ejected with varying levels of force.
P.S. You’re going straight to hell if you’re using chopsticks for yourself but not for them.
Mealtimes are Such Fun! 🤯
****
Baby milestones: They have started trying to walk in earnest. It’s very exciting! I’m not ready for a toddler!
We’ve also entered a phase I tend to enjoy for its predictability: the unpacking baby. My babies, maybe most do? I have insufficient data for this, tend to have a period whereby all containers that contain things must stop containing things. Laundry in a basket must become the laundry out of a basket. Diapers in a bag must be diapers strewn across the floor. A nearly packed diaper bag must become a completely empty diaper bag. It’s easy to keep them busy at this stage. I’m never concerned by the sound of their shaking a ziplock bag, I know what they’re up to but they don’t yet have the dexterity to open sealed bags.
Segue to another thing they enjoy:
They’ve spent months trying to steal Sera’s kibble out of her bowl, never succeeding because we’d always pull them away in time. Sera, it must be noted, would probably let them take the food out of their bowl while she ate. Her only reaction to a baby sneaking up on her food bowl is to move over to make space.
Unbeknownst to me, Smol had discovered the jackpot of an unsealed dog food bag and went to town. I’d dismissively handwaved their location: they’re fine, they’re just playing with Sera’s food bag.
PiC, attentive father that he is, went to check anyway and discovered them with two hands, and a mouth, full of kibble. “Oh. They’re just eating dog food.”
Oh. Oh indeed.
Pupdate
Sera continues to demonstrate hitherto unthought of levels of patience for Smol’s overenthusiastic love pats. They really like petting Sera, but they also pet Sera like a heavy metal drummer.
They do pet all of us that way, but Sera should be the most confused about it. She will walk away if she’s not in the mood, which I am most grateful for, but she’s usually just very patient about it.
Precious Moments
JB: What do you call 2 bananas?
PiC: A pear of bananas?
JB: no! Two slippers!
Us: What? I don’t get it.
JB: It’s just a joke!
*****
The (would-be) traveler’s lament
JB: I wish travel was easier.
Me: Me too.
JB: Why can’t we teleport?
Me: Boy I wish I had the answer to that question.
*****
Are they, though? (Possessiveness)
Me to Smol: Hello, my potato.
JB: Hah, you’re calling them your potato when they’re actually my potato?
Also…
JB to Smol: You’re so cute, you’re so cute, I love you, my dinosaur!
February 1, 2022
On Money
Income
Our primary income comes from our full time jobs. We have minimal income from investing in index funds and dividend stocks (all reinvested). We earn money on the side to supplement our main incomes. We get a bit of income from Swagbucks, cash back sites (Rakuten, Mr.Rebates) and affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon sometimes pay a micro-commission to keep the blog running. There are ways to support the blog and our charitable giving in the sidebar.
Our long term goal is to replace our day job income with passive income before my health prevents me from working. I know from my Mom’s experience that qualifying for or relying on disability is incredibly tough or near impossible here in CA. Aside from that, I aim to do my best to make the most of what we can do while we can.
***
Dividend income. We received $188 in dividends from the stocks portfolio.
***
I cancelled my Chase Sapphire Reserve and got the Chase Freedom Unlimited instead. There was a $200 Bonus on $500 spend, no annual fee, 3% Cashback on drugstores/dining and 1.5% Cashback on anything else. I knocked out that $500 spend 10 minutes after activating the card: we had insurance, water, internet and cell phone bills to pay!
I haven’t done a credit card churn in probably four years, I might do two more cards this year to generate some extra income. We could use a bit of padding against the time we (*knock wood*) start paying childcare and/car payments.
(more…)
January 11, 2022
Honestly that “happy” feels really strange to say right now. As hard as 2020 was between COVID and the stress of The US Presidential election campaign (and all the Congressional races), this year was worse for us.
We lost Seamus this year and 8 more loved ones throughout the year. We continued to work full time and parent full time without more than a little bit of physical help (lots of moral support and virtual support but no one here to hand off the baby to for a few minutes).
After umpteen months of coping during a pandemic, there was big upheaval at work and the fallout from that is still swinging a wrecking ball through my life. That by itself would have been bad enough but piled atop the grief and pain and stress of my personal life, it was just too much.
That was the theme of this year. IT WAS JUST TOO MUCH.
2021 Highlights in Health
Without Seamus, I rise to the top of the Complicated Health list again.
- I continued brain therapy all year and fit in a couple massage therapy appointments. Physically, my pain improved significantly. I was living in a constant state of excruciating pain and it’s come down to an ebb and flow of moderate to severe pain in some unknowable cycle.
- It became obvious that my fatigue was less related to the pain than I previously assumed. My pain had improved but I still felt like I woke in a body weighted down by steel every morning and went to bed with double and triple weights every night. It turns out I check almost every box for ME/CFS.
- It took me half the year to physically recover from pregnancy and childbirth. I’m not totally back yet but the midwife who took care of me at Smol’s birth was amazing and my healing from actual childbirth was so much less painful.
- I was really lonely this year with much of my support network out of touch or out of reach.
PiC needed a lot more outdoor time than he got this year. He really needed more exercise to feel mentally and emotionally good. We are working on this.
JB, Sera and Smol Acrobat are all (with all our gratitude in the world) healthy.
The wild card: COVID. We got our vaccines as soon as we could get appointments and spent most of the year anxiously awaiting news on the kid vaccines. JB is now fully vaccinated and we’re anxious for the under-5 data.
Given my health and Smol’s vulnerabilities (a new baby who can’t mask and a still-developing immune system), we continued to stay relatively isolated and still stuck to most of the same rules even after we were vaccinated and in the case of the adults, boosted: Always masked, mostly outdoors. Global vaccine inequity haunts me. We needed to be much better people than we were, as a society, in 2020 and 2021, and it just didn’t happen. It makes me despair for the future that collectively we could not deal with this whole mess in a way that cared more about people than money.
2021 Highlights in Life
We celebrated our ten year wedding anniversary. We’re still happy with each other, rely on each other, and respect each other. There’s no one else we’d rather be in this whole thing with and that’s something I appreciate every day, no matter how hard the days are. Of course we have our moments, who doesn’t?, but they’re the exception, not the rule.
I marked 15 years of blogging. I’m glad to be here with y’all. I appreciate y’all being here with me, reading and commenting or still lurking (I see you now, C!!)
Last year I said: “Our personal lives will likely shift dramatically with an infant and no childcare.” YUP. But, while I hate the constant juggle, I love that I’ve had all this time with my baby.
JB was in school in person this year. I was highly anxious going into the fall but with their own excellent masking and the many precautions the school did end up taking, our anxiety has been overshadowed by their joy at attending and making new friends. I still hate their principal who we’ve met with a few times. She solidified the foundation for my dislike by lying to us about the communication protocols for COVID.
2021 Highlights in Money
- I ended 2021 with almost the same amount of cash in our checking account as we started. I like that weird feeling of stability or consistency that gives me.
- Our net worth went up 22% from last year. I think our savings rate worked out to approximately 50% but I’m not totally sure if that’s accurate. My spreadsheet turned into a bit of an octopus and well, tentacles everywhere. The data is good enough though, I don’t need it to be exact down to the penny for this summary.
- I stuck with our weekly investing plan all year, starting in June! This is a big accomplishment for me. This is related to the next point:
- On reflection, I realize that my reaction to the pandemic in 2020, though logical at the time because we had more risk exposure than I was comfortable with in the face of a pandemic, really emphasized that I need to stick with regular investing. We had enough cash in hindsight but that real uncertainty with the rental and lack of good tenants scared me into pulling back on all investing so I could have cash in hand to take care of a second mortgage without getting in over our heads. I really wish I’d had more faith that things would be ok if I carried on investing but that’s not how I work! So I am reminding myself to go into 2022 with my plan and stick to it.
- I went many many many rounds with the IRS working out amendments for my last three tax returns when I discovered an error in our accounting. Resulted mostly in refunds needed but also much teeth gnashing and hair rending.
- I added iBonds to our portfolio which I hope not to regret as I am still fighting with Treasury Direct for access to my old account.
- I quit our HSA / HDHP plan for 2022. In CA, we don’t get most of the tax benefits and the stress of tracking the costs we incurred through the year had driven me to avoiding seeking care as needed. I suspect that’s the design and frankly it’s not worth the rather minimal savings.
- Collectively, we did an amazing job with our Lakota families project. We fulfilled 18.5 requests for aid (the 0.5 is a box I haven’t been able to send because I’m in a fight with USPS over my account but I will get that done in 2022!). We started the year with a big load of kids’ supplies to the Allen Youth Center (part of the reservation meant to help the kids of course), and ended the year with a big load of gifts for kids. In between we helped 49 individuals in total, ranging from newborns to elders in their 70s and all the folks in between.
We continued to be fortunate in continuing to work full time and safely at home all year. PiC’s company went through some layoffs and reorgs, which was cause for some anxiety, but we have a solid money plan and we’ll stick to it. If we get hit later on with a change, we’ll deal with it as it comes. (I say through clenched teeth and deep breaths.)
Our spending stayed high this year. We had our internet covered for the year because of PiC’s working from home long term but that was a drop in the bucket compared to our spending. We spent a lot on direct aid, my therapy, insulation for the house, take out a few times a week when we were basically laid out on the floor with fatigue. We also spent a lot on groceries: some convenience foods, some decent ingredients for me to cook bigger batches of meals.
Financial Checklist for 2022
- Confirm that all our accounts have the right beneficiaries.
- Roll over the HSA from our employer-sponsored company to Fidelity (no fees!)
- Figure out our savings / investing schedule so that we don’t ever overdraw the checking account
Thoughts for 2022
Our family doctor said: “I don’t want to be a downer but I just don’t know about 2022.” Though that was very vague, I feel the same way. There’s so much that’s up in the air: Funerals, weddings, will Comic Con happen and can we go?, when do we get vaccines for the under-5 group?, the world is both metaphorically and at times literally (I do live in CA after all) on fire, Republican politics and politicians make me sick to my stomach. It’s so inhumane and the Democratic party continually caving the Republican pressure makes me want to scream.
My financial goals are the same: save more, invest more (weekly), give more. Aim for an FI number that’s not impossibly high but not too optimistically low.
Our expenses are going up. We will likely be paying for childcare and maybe a new car sometime this year (chip shortage dependent!). Both are still a little up in the air for various reasons but if and when they happen, they will be big wallops to our wallets. If interest rates stay the same, I’ll take a loan instead of paying in cash since the cash in the market is making more than interest is costing. This is a very weird choice for me in that I hate loans but I much prefer that to overspending.
We know to expect a minor increase in PiC’s salary. That will be going towards defraying the increased expenses, but it definitely won’t cover all of them.
COVID remains our wild card going into 2022 as we closed out the year with omicron sweeping the nation. CAN we get vaccines for our under-5s already? PLEASE.
:: I hope that 2022 is kinder to all of us. How was your 2021?
January 4, 2022
On Money
Income
Our primary income comes from our full time jobs. We have minimal income from investing in index funds and dividend stocks (all reinvested). We earn money on the side to supplement our main incomes. We get a bit of income from Swagbucks and cash back sites (Rakuten, Mr.Rebates). Some posts have affiliate links that pay a micro-commission to keep the blog running and there are ways to support the blog and our charitable giving in the sidebar to the right.
Our long term goal is to replace our day job income with passive income before my health prevents me from working. I know from my Mom’s experience that qualifying for or relying on disability is incredibly tough or near impossible here in CA. Aside from that, I aim to do my best to make the most of what we can do while we can.
***
Dividend income. This was a very unusual month. We received $894.81 in dividends from the stocks portfolio. Our YTD monthly average is $400. This is definitely not going to cover all the bills!
(more…)
December 7, 2021
On Money
Income
Our primary income comes from our full time jobs. We have minimal income from investing in index funds and dividend stocks (all reinvested). We earn money on the side to supplement our main incomes. We get a bit of income from Swagbucks and cash back sites (Rakuten, Mr.Rebates). Some posts have affiliate links that pay a micro-commission to keep the blog running and there are ways to support the blog and our charitable giving in the sidebar to the right.
Our long term goal is to replace our day job income with passive income before my health prevents me from working. I know from my Mom’s experience that qualifying for or relying on disability is incredibly tough or near impossible here in CA. Aside from that, I aim to do my best to make the most of what we can do while we can.
***
Dividend income. This was a very unusual month. We received $894.81 in dividends from the stocks portfolio. Our YTD monthly average is $400.
(more…)
November 2, 2021
On Money
Income
Our primary income comes from our full time jobs. We have minimal income from investing in index funds and dividend stocks (all reinvested). We earn money on the side to supplement our main incomes. We get a bit of income from Swagbucks, cash back sites (Rakuten, Mr.Rebates), and affiliate links to Bookshop and Amazon sometimes pay a micro-commission to keep the blog running. There are ways to support the blog and our charitable giving in the sidebar.
Our long term goal is to replace our day job income with passive income before my health prevents me from working. I know from my Mom’s experience that qualifying for or relying on disability is incredibly tough or near impossible here in CA. Aside from that, I aim to do my best to make the most of what we can do while we can.
***
Bing rewards. I’ve earned another $25 Target gift card. It’ll go to good use whether for our Lakota families or more diapers.
It’s almost laughable that I squeak together extra cash, maybe ten cents at a time sometimes, so I can justify giving with a freer hand and completely ignore the fact that I give in much larger increments than I earn on the side. I’m ok with that, it’s just funny.
(more…)