By: Revanche

Working through distractions

November 4, 2013

We’ve survived the week of harrowing (which just kept getting worse as we got into it: the LAX shooting was local to us and affected things, there was an attempted suicide situation, there was another death in the family). There’s nothing we can do about any of the big stuff really, we helped where we could and have to keep moving.

We were so busy we basically skipped Halloween and I didn’t even get to post my fun Halloween sign!  So I’m sharing it now.  Humor me, please.

How was everyone’s Halloween, btw? I didn’t see much in the way of plans or costumes this year so do share!

On the bright side, we got a lot done. From that original list, we had to skip seeing friend with new baby and meeting with the photographer; I had two other errands (donations and returns) that we decided to defer as well. Of 12 major things, “only” getting 8  done is not terrible, and I knocked off several other things too: picked up a crafts store GC at a 27% discount; crafted a TON of to do lists and got a good start on filling in most of them; found a lot of photographs to bring back with us; have the next trip back half-planned out.

In case you’re wondering, yes, I’m exhausted.

Spending, spending, spending

~ Wedding costs, extraneous or frivolous ones in my opinion, are starting to add up and I’m retrenching to see where we can save. Friends have offered to help DIY flowers, so we won’t pay for anything more than we use (and not much, at that) and we discovered that friends who are helping with vendor work saves us an additional 60% off their meal cost as vendors are charged at a much lower rate. That’s an unexpected bonus where we were just hoping to include friends and family in a family and friend celebration.

~ PiC’s suit cost about 4 times more than I had anticipated, but it was 50% off so … uh, only 2 times more? And Dad’s suit was right at my mentally budgeted amount so the two of them are very nearly squared away.

~ I’m debating whether to get a discounted GC for Macy’s and buy Dad the really expensive but SUPER nice dress shoes that PiC got for our elopement and has been floating on ever since; Dad insists that he can buy his own shoes but I suspect they’ll be some cheap affair. I don’t want any Sam Vimes Shoe Economy here.  Instead he can wear the fancy ones til he drops and they’ll probably still be in good shape.

~ We’ve also failed miserably at continuing our Wine & Money Wednesdays after the first sitdown so we’re going to have to restart that.  In the meantime, though, our foray into joint banking is getting better and smoother.

Fun and Frivolity

~ I’m really happy that Grimm is back and the ridiculous The Captain + Juliet storyline is over. Also I’m glad that Juliet isn’t being written as the obtuse idiot they had her play earlier.

~ The funnest thing I did in October was the hardest thing: handmaking the beginnings of a costume for Doggle. It’s not done and I have no clue how to make the rest of it but it was weird and entertaining.

~ We’re hosting Thanksgiving for a couple family members this year and I’m extra excited about it. Not just about the 30 lb turkey I want to cook for 4 people, but also about hosting a Thanksgiving in our home for the first time since we’ve lived here. Nervousness about cooking for not just PiC will set in, probably in 2 weeks. Obviously I’m going for making the best cooked and most frugal meal.

Communication and Relationships

~ PiC and I have been enjoying an unusually good period of communication on money, family, wedding planning, Doggle. We don’t normally fight all the time, of course, but we also have had to relearn how to navigate touchy territory since getting married and that makes me more grateful than ever that we’re communicating more effectively these days.  Part of it has simply been articulation: We had been trading planning duties when one of us was super stressed over work stuff; part of it has been being more flexible about things when the other isn’t cooperating. One of the best pieces of advice a colleague gave me on how her business partnership works well: articulate your problem. Ask for help, don’t just assume you need to do it all yourself unless you actually want to!

~ I’m back in contact with childhood cousin companion, thanks to the wedding stuff actually, and age has mellowed us both out. We’re actually chatting like no time has passed at all, but in fact, so much has that we get along better than ever. This is an unexpected nice thing that wouldn’t have happened any time soon had we not planned a celebration.

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