My kid and Tasting Life: Notes from Month 9
November 16, 2015
2:15 am.
I’m a fool. Was offered the opportunity to go back to sleep somewhat peacefully and I squandered it. LB got up at 1:30, upset about something, nursed hir back to sleep. Ze was nestled peacefully against my arm so it seemed like the perfect time to put hir in the crib.
Ze protested, but it seemed like a token protest. I covered hir up with a light blanket so it wouldn’t feel like a shock going from my body heat to a cold crib and crawled back into bed. No sooner did I settle: *squawwwwwwwk*
I ignored it.
*squaaaaaakkkkk squaawwwwk*
Still not listening.
*SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEE* for ten minutes.
Ok ok ok geez.
Ze was unbelievably pleased to be grumpily bundled back up into bed with me, even after a half recumbent diaper change because who would appreciate their infant to stay STILL when being changed in the dark? No one, says LB, so to show my appreciation I shall writhe and wriggle as hard as I possibly can which is pretty hard since you feed me so well, and it’ll therefore be impossible to fasten that diaper with fewer than five hands and an elbow.
Ze didn’t try to play when we got back to bed, thank everything, but hir idea of “settling down” was a series of flopping from back to front to back to front to back, burying hir face in the comforter I’d piled at the foot of the bed to prevent another Great FaceFirst Launch Off the Bed, squeaking and doing a Baby Gregorian chant. If I didn’t know better, and I don’t, ze could have been summoning the Greater Gods of Baby-induced Sleep Deprivation. I’m tired.
After about an hour of this, LB was content to mostly stay still with one foot propped on my ribs, the other on my chin, hands reached up over hir head in an attempt to create a tiny human bridge between me and hir father, still doing that odd Gregorian chant / kitten yowl every 20 seconds in case I might fall asleep. Cute. But when ze was evicted from this womb I’m pretty sure there was a clause in there about not kicking me in the ribs anymore. Ze is in clear violation of hir parole.
Two hours later. I realize that ze has finally stopped emitting any sounds and movements have slowed to nearly a standstill. Oh blessed sleep.
***
Related: The baby food lie: blast from Nicole & Maggie’s archives still holds true. I vaguely remembered the information in this post if not the post itself and with full endorsement from our pediatrician (which was nice but not strictly necessary), proceeded with not very reckless abandon.
We are working on food and not food categories. Food goes into the mouth and is eventually swallowed. Not food includes: any part of Seamus. Confidential documents. Electronics. Remote controls. Any of my comic books. My toes – dear god why would you chew on my toes?? Head bands. Shoes. The dishwasher. Power cables. Furniture. Seamus’s leash. Seamus’s collar. Seamus’s toys. Seamus has made a bid that anything associated with him should be off limits to being eaten. I agree.
Things that still aren’t food but I can’t be bothered if ze chews on them: Legos. My arm. Tags. Bedding. Pillows. Blankets. The drying rack.
It’s a steep learning curve here.
***
Mimicry has suddenly started happening here. We always echo back at LB when ze vocalizes because it’s funny, ze has started echoing back at us when we do it to hir. Everything is just funnier when you’re an infant.
Actions, too. If we do a thing, ze tries to, sometimes. Right now ze is in an ET phone home phase: holding hir index finger out to touch PiC’s when he holds up his hand. Ze won’t do it with me, though. I guess it’s just a daddy-kiddo thing.
***
Word babbles are happening. Ze suddenly added about 5 more consonants to hir 2 vowels. Conversations are still not deep but they’re entertaining. Except when it’s “I’m putting your legs in your pants. KEEP THEM THERE” or “STOP worming away when I’m diapering you!” Then I vaguely wish for five months ago when ze could barely flip. But I guess that’s less language and more Infant With Shit To Do.
***
Ze thinks it’s funny to elicit a reaction out of us by licking inappropriate things. I just figured out ze was just playing me when ze leaned over to the wall, glanced at me, waited til I looked, then licked the wall. Then chuckled at my expression.
***
Teeth are starting to happen. Ze was remarkably pleasant when they started breaking through. Then two days later, it all went to hell. Ze was clingy, upset, every little thing was the end of the world. Dosed hir with Tylenol while we waited for the teething tablets to arrive and we were back to normal. Getting new teeth is a tough business.
Best part: ze is genuinely curious about this “teeth” thing and occasionally pries open PiC’s mouth to investigate what’s going on in there. That’s also just a daddy-kiddo thing, ze has no interest in my teeth. I think it’s for the best.
Things we love
LB most preferred to chew on my arms when hir gums were uncomfortable but when those teeth finally poked through, that was a no-go. A combination of frozen teething rings, hard teething toys, and teething tablets saved us all. The tablets were miraculous for those middle of the night wake ups when ze couldn’t stay asleep.
We introduced sippy cups a while ago, but while ze is willing to drink water, ze hasn’t quite got the hang of the whole thing.
Earlier…
Month 8: Exploration
Month 7: Ambulation
Month 6: Becoming human
Month 5: Toes
Month 4: Velociraptor Claws
Month 3: Growth Spurts
Month 2: Hates sleep
Month 1: Banshee
Awwwwwwwwwww!
nicoleandmaggie recently posted…Savings, sacrifice, and the “why” question
Man, suddenly I feel a lot less envious of parents. But I’m glad to hear ze is progressing so well and… animatedly? And don’t worry, I’m sure ze will be fascinated by your body parts again soon enough. Preferably not the toes.
Abigail @ipickuppennies recently posted…Wherein our progress is better than expected
Glad to serve as a PSA? 🙂 It’s got its ups and downs, and thankfully there’s that biological imperative to forgive the kid because ze is so damn cute.
I think I’m ok with hir not being into my body parts, especially now that teeth are part of the picture!
1. TEETH!!!!
Mine still loves grabbing my face, and just SHOVING his fingers in there to pry my mouth open to check my teeth
Does it to Daddy too.
2. They’re just playing you
I remember those days.. of squealing and squeeing like a banshee when you thought EVERYTHING WAS FINE… *sigh* Nope.
Mine can’t sleep solidly without flopping around and screaming to save his life. Flop, squeal, flop, crawl, squeal… *NIGHTMARE*
3. Wait until they start TRULY mimicking you, like trying to talk on the phone or ‘help’… it’s really adorable.
sherry @ save. spend. splurge. recently posted…Style Shopper: Dressing Room Reviews of Mango from Autumn 2015
Does yours have nightmares and sleep-cry too? Because sometimes LB starts to cry, my heart stops like NO YOU HAVE ONLY BEEN ASLEEP HALF AN HOUR, and it’s just sleep-crying. Weird.
I really really love these updates. I can just picture hir and the wall lick!
SP recently posted…What kind of manager do you prefer?
And I can guarantee that you’d still be able to see it in person 🙂
Aw, the memories!
Ours loved to play “dentist” – and those little fingers were surprisingly strong! They were also used to Daddy and most of our male friends having beards, and were a little confused when they met men who did not. They would pat the clean-shaven cheeks softly, looking at the gentleman in question with a quizzical look like, “Just what kind of person are you, with a male voice but no hair on your face?” So cute.
SherryH recently posted…Busybusybusy
I am shocked by how strong tiny fingers can be!
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