By: Revanche

Everything seems worse when you’re sick

February 29, 2016

Last week’s ode to the Internet was timely.

This weekend was a trial, made slightly less grueling by having some access to the outside world. Last week I dragged along, trying to muster some good energy pockets each day but utterly failed. The best I could manage was being patient with an increasingly grouchy LB when ze was home and becoming one with the sofa when ze wasn’t. By Saturday, it was no use denying it: another round of illness had come a-knocking and we were fool enough to open the door. PiC was on nearly solo parenting duties, I simply couldn’t stay awake. He kept sending me to bed, and intellectually it’s nothing to feel guilty about, but it’s hard to shake the feeling of not pulling your own weight.

And it’s hard to shake the feeling of uselessness when random body parts stop working. Like the left knee doesn’t bear weight so “walking” is really “wobbling”, or three fingers are so swollen you can’t bend them. Or standing up makes your head spin, dip and swim.

Thankfully, I got a little work and household management done online, amid the brain fog, so that restless need to accomplish something more than having bizarre dreams and sustaining life was fulfilled.

Tetchy Toddler

Granted, it has everything to do with being sick but LB was prone to grouchy outbursts not unlike an angry, thwarted hunting velociraptor. Keep feeding the wee beastie, y’all, a sick raptor-baby is naught to mess with.

And can you blame hir? It’s miserable coughing all night. Poor thing wakes up in the middle of the night burning up, crying, because ze doesn’t understand what on earth is going on. I feel like a heel walking away from the piercing “maaa maa maaaaa!” when we’ve done everything I can for hir and ze doesn’t want to be cuddled to sleep. Rough times.

I don’t know how single parents manage, half the time ze was sobbing because ze wanted PiC. Seamus and I were on standby to fetch and carry, slather vapo-rub and administer Motrin, but ze wanted hir dad and only hir dad for comfort.

Moody Muttley

Seamus is off-kilter too. He’s been refusing his antihistamines and vitamins for weeks. He grudgingly takes them under protest.

It’s hard to tell if something is wrong or if he’s just in an extended funk.

Could be he’s worn out being moral support from our weeks of being sick. He always gets up to join us when LB is sick and being tended to.

Dad and delinquent accounts

Dad’s been missing utility payments.

I know because I am still remotely monitoring the accounts, not because he has learned his lesson about telling me the truth.

$100 here, $80 there. $400 for the electricity, another $200 for the water and trash. They pile up month after month as he pays what he can, saying nothing to me about the rest. Add that to the more than $1000 we pay per month for his rent and and it piles up. As does the aggravation.

I’m deep breathing through it lest the frustration eat me alive. Our budget continues to bear the monetary cost, I refuse to let the cost of his silence be my sanity. But it’s a little harder each day that feels like everything is subtly wrong.

One-horse home

We’re still a single car household and the inconvenience far outweighs the savings. On days when LB and PiC are out together, Seamus and I are limited to going only so far as I can hike, and if we have to run errands, well, we can’t. Unfortunately, he’s too popular with random strangers which makes it unsafe to leave him outside while I run in to run errands. He and I only run errands where he’s allowed inside. In case you think I’m being paranoid, someone just tried to steal our neighbor’s equally cute and friendly pup when they’d run into a cafe to pick up an order. 30 seconds is all it takes for someone to walk off with our dogs. What is wrong with people??

Shaking it off

I’m getting some work filed away to make Monday less painful, and by extension, the rest of the week as well. Maybe, just maybe, we can shake this funk before Tuesday.

How was your weekend? How does your week ahead look? 

10 Responses to “Everything seems worse when you’re sick”

  1. Linda says:

    Damn, that’s a rough week and weekend! I hope the extra rest you got this weekend helps and this week starts coming together for you.

    I spent most of the weekend offline. Now that the doc has cleared me to resume all my normal activities, I picked them back up this weekend. I spent four hours volunteering with a local animal rescue charity on Saturday, then spent the evening with neighbors/friends and the BF having drinks and dinner at their home. Sunday was a running around day, but we managed to fit in a breakfast excursion, and scenic driving/walking around the errands.

    Then this morning the week has started in an oppressive way with a message from sister that mom is in the hospital with pneumonia and bunch of work that MUST be completed in two days (so someone says) popping up seemingly out of nowhere. *sigh*

    It’s interesting that you mention your reticence to take Seamus out on errands. One of the things I’ve noted as specifically endearing to me about this little town is that I feel comfortable walking the dog to places and clipping her outside for a few minutes while I handle a quick transaction. I try to leave her in sight (her being able to see me is just as important as me being able to keep an eye on her) and never leave her for longer than five minutes. It’s wonderful to be able to pick up a reserved book, pay the water bill, or buy coffee beans without worrying about someone walking off with my dog. I would never do that in Chicago. The few times I took her on a walk to the store, I had someone along who would stay outside with her.

    • Revanche says:

      Thanks! I noticed you weren’t online much, I was hoping that was by choice and not because of pain. That weekend sounds lovely.

      Pneumonia, oy! I hope she recovers quickly and good luck with that suddenly “urgent” work :/

      I wonder why the difference between our towns. I know people DO clip their dogs outside on occasion, our neighbor obviously being one, but even I had a sneaking suspicion that I was being paranoid. I couldn’t shake the certainty that I’d rather be safe than sorry and then their experience confirmed it. He always gets to go with me to non-food shops though.

  2. Tim came down with an upper respiratory last night. The fourth time he woke me up out of a dead sleep — only one of those being to ask me what we had that would actually work — I went into the guest bedroom and slept. Peacefully.

    He felt bad, even though he can’t help that he’s got a trumpet for a nose even at the best of times and sneezes like it’s a shouting contest.

    I’m going to pick up some Sudafed while I’m out and about. Poor guy.
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    • Revanche says:

      Oh I feel so bad for both of you. It’s tough enough being us without adding a stupid virus. And it’s so hard to lose sleep. I hope the Sudafed helps!

  3. Oh dear. I’m hoping for some sort of sunshine in all of this. Deep breaths for you, virtual hugs from me. Hoping for a funk-less Tuesday!

    • Revanche says:

      Thank you very much! I was probably optimistic shooting for Tuesday recovery, overcompensating for how crappy I felt 🙂 but soon! Maybe Wednesday!

  4. Hannah says:

    I had a case of the Mondays too. Kenny was at home thanks to some stomach flu he caught over the weekend. Rob got hit by it too, and is now lying in our bed moaning.

    Everything is worse when you’re sick, and you’re right, it’s impossible to understand how single parents do it.

    • Revanche says:

      Oh my, it seems like everyone has a case of something terrible in the household! Wishing you protection from the bug, and hoping the guys recover soon.

      I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again: no amount of money can make up for having a partner who’s right there with you for all the middle of the night wakeups.

  5. Sense says:

    I hope you feel better soon. x.

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