By: Revanche

My kid and notes from Year 1.9

November 16, 2016

My kid in Year 1.9 What’s yours is mine and mine is yours

We’ve entered a phase where JuggerBaby really wants us all to be doing similar things. If I’m not eating, ze doesn’t want to eat. If I AM eating, ze wants to eat too – but ze wants to eat the thing I was about to take a bite of. So we go halfsies on a lot of things. Except yogurt. Ze will eat all of my yogurt if I’m not paying attention.

Ze is really into family time, sitting on the floor mat, and pointing at a spot next to zir very emphatically: SIT HERE. Ze has us pretty well trained and is doing zir darnedest to get Seamus to cooperate. He’s no fool, though, he keeps a safe distance between them. Unless carrots are on offer. Then they’re buddies.

Imitation isn’t exactly flattery

You think the kid’s not paying attention to you until you’re woken up one morning at FinCon by a badge-wearing bundle of energy holding your cell phone to your ear yelling “Yeee-yooo?? YEEAAA-YOOO!!”

I don’t sound like that!¬† How rude.

Self defense from the womb

I don’t know when it happened but JuggerBaby has a brilliant set of self defense skills. Ze is a complete klutz, like zir bemused and vaguely proud mama, but if you come in to pick zir up against zir will, or try to tickle attack, ze goes into a guard position that would make a quarterback and linebacker proud. You’d have to look twice to be sure ze didn’t have the pigskin tucked under the right elbow as ze fended you off with the left hand sweep.

And try, I dare you, TRY to grab zir belly when ze doesn’t want you to. Ze sweep-blocks your hand like ze is a wushu master and follows up with an elbow to the throat. I can almost hear the Mortal Kombat “FINISH HIM” in the background.

I had to train for years to get any kind of feel for this sort of self defense. Apparently I passed it all on through the umbilical cord?

Parenting skills: baby chores

Several months ago, I was pretty sure we had a budding fluff and folder here. Ze would help me take the washed clothes out to put in the dryer, piece by piece, usually licking it before handing it over. That’s apparently become boring, though, so we’ve upgraded zir jobs.

Ze helps PiC unload the dishwasher in the morning, only licking the occasional utensil, and only sometimes dumping all my silverware in a hidden spot. After work, ze is responsible for taking socks and other laundry to the laundry basket or the washing machine, and for throwing away any trash ze might find.

If ze is balky, I can always bribe zir with the offer of letting zir give Seamus treats. Works like a charm. We think it’s important that ze learns to contribute to the household!

Surprising things about parenting

Still licking everything!

Why are we still telling JuggerBaby not to eat the soap, lick the dog, the butter, the floor, our shoes….??

“Ze has licked worse” shouldn’t still be such a regular part of our daily conversation.

Things we are loving

Favorite books

Where the Wild Things are, Maurice Sendak

I’m at least a little wary that this is such a favorite right now. Especially when ze is stuck on the wild rumpus part and still wild rumpusing when we’re 3 pages past. But it’s amazing how many read throughs ze will sit for when you remember that usually you can’t even get through one page before ze chooses the next book. It’s a fun read, though.

Favorite bath toys

Empty Luxury Lane jars: toddler’s top recommendation. These are the best for catching water and dumping it on my head. Ze will occasionally dump it over zir own head too, then fling back zir head in squinty-eyed disgust at being splashed in the face.

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