July 10, 2008
BF pulled it off: he found a round trip itinerary for which we could redeem his free ticket voucher, so I’m going to Oregon to see my cousin in August!
It’ll be a long weekend for me, but unfortunately something came up at work and she has to go in, after all. Boooo. Perhaps I can bring her lunch at work. š
We’ll probably go out on the town one night, and I hope we’ll go hiking on Saturday. Because I’m flying United, I’m already trying to mentally maximize my carry-on luggage and minimize the amount of stuff I’ll have to bring.
I’ll be staying at her house, and she has more toiletries and make-up than I’d know what to do with, so I don’t have to waste room on those things. Just the basics, really, two pairs of jeans and three tops. Appropriate shoes.
So excited!!
June 1, 2008
My lovely friends, the original two wheels to my third, stole me away for a beach trip yesterday.
The male half was meant to have brunch with me in the late morning, but stood me up to play tennis for two hours. To make up for it, we semi-planned to have coffee but that fell through as well. He rang me up about an hour later to invite me to join them at the beach instead. Uh …. uh …. ok!
I just don’t do spontaneous, so I was at a loss for how to prepare for a beach trip with only 30 minutes to get myself together. It’s not that I get ready at a snail’s pace, I’m just an inveterate planner, and things like that throw me for a loop. Anyway, I dug out my bathing suit and a couple beach towels, a book and my phone, and was set. Well, I was set only because my friend had already gone on a Summer Shopping Spree and picked up a new cooler, beach umbrella, snacks and drinks. He would have gotten us magazines too, but his girlfriend wasn’t with him and he refused to buy Cosmo without her. Just as well, I was already set with my reading material.
We got there late in the afternoon, and paid for a couple hours of parking ($3). The breeze was awfully chilly but the skies were clear for miles, and the sun was still going strong. I pried myself off the blanket where, huddled, I was not getting any warmer and took myself for a long run/walk/sprint session all the way down the shoreline and back. By the time I returned, I was sweating and ready to jump in the ocean. They were playing chess on a 10 game set they’d found for $9.97; justifiably proud of their dollar/game bargain.
Despite my hesitance to abuse my hands, we threw a football and Frisbee around in a game that quickly devolved into throwing as best we could, or throwing as best we could to get it around, past, or over the head of the catcher. I lost count of the number of tosses that went WAY over my head that I still went for and I’ll still be tweezing sand out of my scraped knees tomorrow!
Another hour ($1.50) was spent winding down and half-napping until it was just too cold to lay out any longer, and we went off to the Cheesecake Factory. To be honest, I developed an aversion to CF a long time ago, but was apparently too tired to put up any resistance, so iPhone Googlemapped some restaurants for us, and we found ourselves waiting outside the restaurant with our little pager within the hour.
My garlic spaghettini with chicken was delicious, as was the slice of original cheesecake we shared three ways. Friend only let me get the tip ($5). If he hadn’t just run short of cash, he wouldn’t have even let me get that much, halfsies was out of the question.
Home at nine, glad that the money spent came out of the reimbursement cash for the collect calls because I wouldn’t have even had any cash on me at all, and happy to have spent such a nice day with friends. My calves are less thrilled, though. Beach running is rough on the feet.
May 22, 2008
As part of my All-About-Me day earlier this week, I took myself to see Iron Man! (Is that very strange sentence construction? I felt like I took myself on a date, so that’s how I’m phrasing it.) I’m usually very skeptical of comic movies because I’m convinced that they’re going to ruin the story, but I really enjoyed the movie. Robert Downey, Jr., surprised me, pleasantly, as did the dialogue. Yes, they did take some liberties with his history for the sake of building the storyline, but in the context of the movie, it worked.
Other than driving way too much, I spent very little all day. I ate a light breakfast at home, went to a different mall to find my bag but didn’t, and watched a movie using my cheap AMC pass from months ago.
I spent some time browsing stores at another mall while waiting for my Genius Bar appointment, browsing at Borders, and searching futilely for a Nine West so I could do something about my broken flats. No luck on the Nine West, but I did get my iPhone replaced.
Made another grocery run, picked up oh-so-healthy Jeno’s pizzas, and some fruit for my lunches this week. They also had sharp cheddar cheese and multi-grain bread on sale, plus with peel-off coupons, so I ended up spending $19 on groceries. The Jeno’s pizzas are a complete guilty pleasure, but at 69 cents a pop, I’m not feeling TOO guilty.
As my head hit the pillow late that night, I found myself thinking, “That was awfully nice … I really need to do that more often.”
March 22, 2008
so late into the night…”
At least not this month, anyway.
Going out to bars, or dancing, or staying up all night is, quite often, the perennial tale of foolish youth gone by, the “good old days” for many of my cohort. Perhaps not for my immediate friends, but for friends of friends, or coworkers, or even the slightly older friends in their 40s or 50s. Most everyone has fond anecdotes of their days in college or after high school when they’d stay out all night, drag in the early morning exhausted, only to shower and head out to face a day of work. Heck, that still describes the habits of many of my industry colleagues during our week-long conferences! I don’t know how they’re still up and about after all that, but I’ve never been able to hang with the cool crowd because I definitely need sleep. Blame it on the arthritis. Then, too, I never really wanted to because I was on the wrong side of the dichotomy: there were the hard-partiers who could be up past 4 am drinking, or my own, must be responsible, type. As a card-carrying member of the second group, I always felt awkward committing to drinks with the partiers, and having to duck out early every time.
Without the pressure to stay out all hours, though, going out sounded like a lot of fun. And with a 26th birthday looming this year, it’s time to shake things up before I completely fossilize. Since my friends who have embraced the social scene are in New York, and those who continue to avoid a social life are in Southern California, I floated the idea to the gals at work. We’ve all been working really hard, so they were game. We planned a night on the town after work last Friday. [This is a great group, not only do we get along well enough to work and play together, we wear about the same sizes and can exchange clothes. Win-win!]
We had it all figured out. Coworker’s friend, our DD, made up our fourth, and arranged for free passes to a Hollywood club. We figured out a relay driving system to share gas and parking costs. It was going to be some good, cheap, fun! Well, it was definitely fun, but the cheap part went awry.
Foolishly, I’d thought getting to work an hour earlier on Friday meant we could leave earlier, get some rest, food, and prettied up for our night out on the town. Stupid deadlines. We couldn’t leave until 7:30! By that time, we starvelings were also punch drunk from sleep deprivation, which boded well for the rest of the night. Also, we found out that our free club was hosting an all-Asian night Friday, and that was much less appealing. Yes, I realize that sounds mean and I’m also Asian, but that doesn’t mean I really want to be in a club full of them. It’s a different crowd and music and energy than what we had in mind. So, change of plans. We decided to start elsewhere, where we could get some proper ’80s music, and that cost us.
As it turns out, Hollywood is quite the expensive town for spur-of-the-moment plans. I’d budgeted $20 total, but only brought $14 in cash because I didn’t have time to run to the bank. Also, credit cards are normally my go-to form of payment anyway.
For dinner, we shared a fine repast of Vietnamese food: $7 each, tip included. Since we had a DD, we gals each had a cocktail while getting dressed at Coworker’s place, but our overall tardiness meant that we had less than ten minutes to get ready if we wanted to make it to the first club in time to use our coupons. We’d managed to scare up $5 off coupons, which would have been perfect had we arrived by 10:30. Alas, leaving work late meant we had dinner late, got ready late, and had to pay in full. Booo. Our DD had to pony up the extra money for us girls who didn’t bring enough cash. What’s with clubs charging $15 cover, and not taking credit cards? Preposterous!
Then it turned out that both clubs required a $20 minimum to use credit cards. I was to drive C2 back to her apartment at the end of the night, so I’d stopped drinking, but the others were, and that means I couldn’t pay back either DD or C1 for paying for dinner or cover by buying their drinks. Also, they paid for our water because they’d opened tabs or had cash. Gr, I hate owing people money!
Don’t worry, though, I didn’t spend the whole night fretting over money. The first club was well worth the cover because they played ’80s favorites nearly the whole time: Prince, Depeche Mode, Billy Joel, Toni Basil, Michael Jackson, and of course, Madonna. There was a blonde guy up front on stage the entire night and he was an absolute SCREAM. I have never seen a man, gay or straight, so seriously rocking out and playing air guitar in my LIFE. They had a huge multi-step stage on which anyone could dance, and of course, C2 insisted on going up there. While I really haven’t got rhythm, I didn’t feel the least bit self-conscious up there because the crowd was so fun! The energy of a crowd out to dance is palpable, and intoxicating.
We crossed the Walk of Fame and passed the historic El Capitan Theater on the way to our free club, nicknamed “Asia.” I’ve never done this before. Never enjoyed the sights in Los Angeles, never been out there just to have fun. The night was blustery and nearly frigid, our feet rudely reminded us that we’re not 19 anymore. It was, as C1 said, almost like we were in an actual city, where you could walk wherever you wanted to go. It faintly reminded me of New York. Asia wasn’t 100% Asian as we’d feared so it was a good time there too, but we were pretty wiped out by then and people were much too fond of using their elbows to get through the crowd. There was a flying cocktail glass, at some point, and ice on the dance floor. We finally called it a night at 2 am, and hobbled through the cold night to our car, exhausted and happy. Most of all, happy to be sitting down.
Now I’m both out of cash, and owe C1 ($6) and DD ($10). Total spent: $30. Oh. Hm, doing the math just now, I thought I’d gone over quite a bit more than that. Both my wallet and feet need a little R&R. š
March 10, 2008
As I said yesterday, I gave myself permission to have fun this weekend, and to start developing different habits.
Over the past several years, I’ve been overly responsible and highly critical of myself because I still haven’t resolved any long-term problems. Recognizing and admitting that I have limits was very difficult to do, but having done so, I’ve been working on some ways to incorporate actual living into my life and stop using my obligations as an excuse to hide in the BatCave that is my room. I intend to make these changes healthy habits, a few steps at a time!
A look at my typical week generally reveals that I: work, eat, read and sleep. Stress, work, eat, sleep. Rinse and repeat. When Friday rolls around, I go home, heaving a sigh of relief for Saturday mornings, and hide in my room from human interaction. Saturday mornings mean sleeping in and running errands or household chores most of the day. Again, hide from human interaction in the evening. Sundays might require more errands, perhaps more hiding. There’s not a whole lot of scope for say, fun or pleasure.
To change that, I have to change both why and when I get in my own way of having fun.
First, understand that having fun isn’t a zero-sum game. You can have fun, be frugal, and responsible.
Cost: I’m not sure yet, maybe approximately $20/week?
Second, the weekend is a pretty darn good time to do that, instead of working.
Cost: No OT income, but we’re very limited there right now anyway.
Third, I have a terrible habit of taking on extra responsibilities. Every time someone has a problem, runs short of money, can’t do their job, or is having a bad day, I always run to bail them out. No more. I’m going to wait to see if they really need my help, or if they just needed a shoulder, some advice, or nothing at all and are able to handle it themselves.
I’m not bailing out my brother anymore, and stand firm in my conviction that he needs to work out his problems that he’s created in his life.
My parents need to support themselves more, both for their sanity and dignity, and so I’m going to stop jumping to pay for every single thing, and allow them to carry as much of their own weight as they feel able. While my past actions were justified, ie: putting their credit card debt in my name because they didn’t qualify for 0% BT cards, I rarely looked for a better solution than just doing it myself. There wasn’t always one, but there might have been. I just didn’t look before, so I’m looking now.
I’ve taken the familial responsibilities and limited their effects on my life, and have to accept that they’ll remain very present in my daily life, but I don’t have to feel guilty that I’m not doing more. I’ll just do what I can, while still taking time out for me.
On Saturday, because I don’t want MaDucky driving, I used the morning to run my errands, and added her grocery list to my to-do list. Also, since PaDucky has started working some very long hours, I dropped off his lunch so that she wouldn’t have to. After that, the day was mine.
It’s been about 8 weeks since my last haircut, so it was more than time to get groomed. I made plans to spend two hours at the hair school (responsible), a bit of time with a friend in the area (fun), a couple hours at a free art gallery opening reception also in the area (fun), and plans to go out dancing with my friends and coworkers (more fun!).
Cost: $20, gas
$14, haircut
$0, art gallery
$5, parking in Chinatown
Coworker’s friend unexpectedly jumped to order and pay for our drinks as soon as we got to the bar, and we also chose a place with no cover charge, so I didn’t even spend the $20 that I budgeted.
Fourth, a couple hours of dancing was great exercise, and a pointed reminder that I’m woefully out of shape. We’ve made plans to go out next weekend because another coworker wanted to join us, and we’ll observe the same criteria: no cover, carpool if possible to avoid excessive parking fees, just one or two drinks.
Fifth, my friend, a massage therapist, has begun to come down once a week on Sundays to work on MaDucky and me. I opted to allocate a LOT of money for my FSA this year, and I wanted to make sure that I was getting use from that fund throughout the year, rather than waiting until the last second and buying 300 bottles of Tylenol. We’ll do weekly sessions for about two months, and taper off to twice a month, probably. Because she operates independently and she’s a good friend, she only charges us $80 for two 1-hour sessions. MaDucky is already starting to feel the benefits after one and a half sessions, and it’s great help in my quest to stop carrying all my stress in my neck and shoulders. That also means that my sleep will become much more restful. Win win win!
Cost: Paid for by FSA.
Sixth, my memory is starting to rejoin the cast of Mind, Body and Spirit here, and that means I’m slowly remembering my kung fu forms. I’m making it a point to work through them at least a few times a week.
Cost: Free!
April 25, 2007
My Obsessions Five just doesn’t quite ring the same.
Moom tagged me a few days ago. There’s an odd voyeuristic sort of fun to this particular meme because it’s fun reading about everyone’s obsessions, but am I really obsessed? Only time will tell. (And deprivation.)
There’s the obvious one: finances. I all too clearly enjoy the time I spend with my finances: nurturing, lecturing, egging them on. It’s probably borderline OCD because I get panicky if I’ve missed tending to them for more than a couple days. Almost nothing gets me as juiced up as talking, reading or discussing financials and ways to make, save and save’n’save money. And it’s so difficult not to go all evangelical whenever I see or hear my hapless audience going all squinty-eyed, even over the phone I can hear them do it, I swear, as I gabble on about how finances Can Be Fun.
Reading: Everything. Books, short stories, newspapers, magazines, blogs, comics, webcomics, commentary on webcomics, emails ….. everything. These days I have to move away from just reading quantity and selecting more quality but back in the day I always had my nose buried in a book no matter what I was doing. Even when we were reading a class-assigned book, I’d be reading my own book simultaneously. Yeah, that made the teacher really happy. I always wondered if I could be paid to read when I grew up. I should have specified that I wanted to be paid to read what I wanted to read, but …. well, I wasn’t so much a details kind of kid.
This practically deserves its own category but it’s still reading: I love comics. When I have disposable income, my drug of choice is primarily trade paperbacks, or graphic novels, now but that’s more of a practicality based on saving money on buying a single book collecting the monthly issues once every six months, and my patience factor of zero. I’m old, I can’t bear the anticipation of reading 15 pages of comic a month and then sit back to wait another month for my next installment. Then too, there’s the highly inefficient storage system I’ve got going on now, which is a short box under my bed and another one next to it, trades on the bookshelf. I admit it, I can’t wait to have my own house so that I have a real library and a wall dedicated to my comics and trades. San Diego Comic Con = Mecca.
Organizing/Planning: Office Birthday Monkey, Friends’ Birthday Alarm, Shindig Instigator. That’s me! And it’s automatically a surprise. It just is. And never happier am I than when obsessing over something, be it money, what I’m going to be when I grow up, when I’m going to grow up, or how I’m going to accomplish my goals that I previously obsessed over setting. You get the picture. I still haven’t reached conclusions for many of the those things but the act of obsessing is oddly filling.
Food: Food and I, we have an understanding. Except mushy/funny texture foods like ripe bananas, beans, mushrooms, etc. Approximately 60% of our office conversations revolve around food: what we’re craving, recipe exchanges, what’s for lunch, what’s for lunch tomorrow, desserts, food pictures, and the like.
Cleaning: By nature I’m a packrat, but only cyclically. The frugal part of me always stashes everything from ribbons on presents to half eaten energy bars because you never know when you might need that particular color of ribbon, and you certainly can’t throw food away! You can eat it later. But then, I’ve assisted in many a home-moving expedition and the idea of putting a bunch of stuff in a box, hauling said crap to another location, and having unpack that box eighteen months later is utterly revolting. If I don’t need it now, tomorrow, next week or next season, I don’t need it. Junk gets rounded up and donated, sold or chucked on a semi-regular basis. This brings enormous satisfaction.
And: Wanda, Tired of Being Broke, Golbguru, I tag you!
