January 10, 2020
1. Though PiC warped the lid of our Pyrex terribly in the microwave, they honored the warranty and sent us a new lid promptly.
2. I’m really happy that my hands can handle Pyrex now – this time last year, it was not possible. This means our use of plastic wrap has gone down at least 50%, possibly more!
3. We traded drop-off and cooking shifts mid-week. Though it shortened my work day, I liked going to pick up JB and coming home to dinner being served. I don’t mind cooking 90% of the time, it’s what works for us normally, but a break from that job is really nice too!
4. We FINALLY got our replacement waterproof dog beds in! Seamus and Sera both like it very much.
5. We’ve finally committed to meeting with our contractor to see what kind of work we can get done this year. I’m narrowing down my Must Haves and hoping that we can break up our landscaping work into about three stages so that we can at least create one safe space for Seamus to enjoy before he’s too much older. He’s slowing down a lot, and having a safe yard space to roll around in would be so nice for him.
6. Good news: all the major events I was still waiting on dates for this year have been scheduled so now I can get to work on logistics. Bad news: Unfortunately the timing of both are terrible! We will make them work, but gosh they are such bad timing and are going to make for a tough summer.
:: How was your week? Do you have all your major events for 2020 set?
January 3, 2020
1. Talking to friends whose kids are in activities year round, I definitely feel like a slacker parent. The kids are in a year round sport (4 nights a week) plus a seasonal sport every season and they’re only doing all of this because the kids still have so much fun and love it all. They CAN do it because they have good health and a nanny and a whole lot of money between the two of them so I don’t feel guilty for not doing it before but I do feel like I might need to kick myself in gear this year and start taking JB to more than one 30 minute activity per week. That was always the plan but I only managed to add one activity last year on our budget and our time constraints. Maybe I could manage two this year? PiC does equal ferrying to lesson duty for the one activity so it’s not all on me. This is mainly to keep zir active and really I’d love to add another sport thing for PiC, I think he’d be happier with another sport hobby. But it’s all $$$$.
2. This year I’m working on somehow cutting out my intense feelings of worry over a friend’s domestic abuse situation that is only going to escalate from the Intensely Worrying stage to whatever is after that, so I can focus on being supportive without wrecking myself. Wrecking myself doesn’t help anyone. Is this possible? Let’s find out.
December 20, 2019
1. The NOT good thing is I have a huge pain flare up today. It woke me from a rare deep sleep, it was so bad. No idea if it was diet / weather / sleeping wrong related.
So this morning I am deeply grateful for heating options like my fabulous rice bag gift from my dear friend, my hot tea and the means to heat it (which I do not take for granted with the power outages of late), and my heat patches that got me through the first hour from 2 to 3 am when it was all I could do it just keep breathing.
2. I was lucky enough to have booked a massage several weeks ago for this week and though it was nearly impossible to get away on time, I made it to the appointment. My therapist got the pain down from severe to just below moderate. I can just about deal with that while also stressed to the GILLS preparing for the holidays. Now, I just have to kick the dregs of this cold. I can never be so foolish as to say “I’m about to kick this cold” because then it gets stronger and turns on me with a vengeance. The second round of the same cold is twice as evil.
How’s your immune system this week?
3. I always try to be done with the financial books before mid December so if there are any last minute transactions to be made, I can make them in the year. Reminder of that time I tried to do some tax loss harvesting and totally fumbled the ball – selling off the stock so late that the transaction processed in the next year. Whoops!
I’ve updated most of our spreadsheets for our rental property (thank you thank you thank you Past Me who took the time to update that sheet up through October), for our tax preparation including all our itemized deductions and miscellaneous income, and leading into 2020 for our day to day expenses.
Have you tackled your tax documents yet or do you have a good system for this whole mess?
4. JB’s friend lost a parent suddenly and unexpectedly this week. We were so sad to hear it and had to share the news with JB to see if ze wanted to attend the funeral. Ze did, and composed a really solid condolence letter as ze processed the idea that Mr H was dead and not even 100 years old yet: “Dear Xav, I’m sorry your parent died. I love you.”
Our writing lessons are bearing fruit.
5. I’ve always been a milk chocolate eater but I decided that Nicole and Maggie’s recommendation of very omigah dark chocolate (sugar free) is better than no chocolate and I’m adjusting to the bitterness. Each passing day the bitterness seems less so in a couple weeks I should be set with one little non painful treat?
December 12, 2019
1. JB had a play date without us monitoring for the first time! O_O
It was a huge step for me for a lot of reasons but it was with a group of kids we’ve known for a couple of years and parents that we get along with well, so … we gave it a try. It was a much longer visit than we planned. Ze was totally worn out but we had good reports: zir manners were excellent, when ze was upset by a scary bit of a show ze just went and asked an adult to sit with zir instead of emulating the behavior of a cousin that I can’t bear (screaming at the top of their lungs until the scene is over). We spent some time chatting with and laughing over parenting stories with the parents before taking zir home and I think that really made a difference. We like this group of kids enough to offer to set up a date night rotation so we can exchange free babysitting with them.
2. PiC was razzing me about always wanting to try the local Peruvian cuisine. There are two ingredients that feature heavily in Peruvian cuisine that he doesn’t care for, so he always focuses on them. But I have vision! At least when it comes to food. Peruvian is so much more than cooked tomatoes and plantains! There’s not much in the way of affordable Peruvian, it’s mainly the fancy places here, but I found a small hole in the wall sort of place to try and I sold him on their fresh chips and salsa. Once there, we were floored by the new to use dishes that were amazing: Sopa Siete (no carbs, no sugar, perfect for me!) and Tallerines Saltado Carne. This was a huge treat. As was PiC’s mea culpa for doubting me. š
3. It feels like it’s been a full year of intentional effort in building on our local relationships, particularly with each socializing encounter eating up a lot of my limited energy, but I am being hopeful that it will be worth the investment. PiC and I want to keep investing time and effort in our people and relationships, and I’m glad we’re on the same page.
In the past two weeks, we have had more spontaneous socializing than I’ve had in the entire several years before this: we ran into a friend at daycare and asked them over for dinner. We had a friend ask to drop by with a gift for JB and they stayed to lunch, no big deal. I’m not at the point where I can host like Angela does but I do like that within reason (I’m still a massive introvert after all). Say, one or two weekends a month sounds good.
4. I commented that I didn’t have time to do the laundry over the weekend as an offhand reminder to myself to do it during the week after I cleaned out the washer drum of fur. Because he was up early and rested, PiC remembered what I said and did all the laundry on Monday morning before I got up. BONUS: I was able to change into fresh from the dryer warm clothes! Best. Partner. Ever.
5. I love this from Terry Pratchett’s Dodger (bold mine): “Money makes people rich; it is a fallacy to think it makes them better, or even that it makes them worse. People are what they do, and what they leave behind.”
6. I feel CRUNCHED for time this week and next. We have a lot to prepare for various holiday cards and gifts for a lot of loved ones. Even keeping it relatively minimal (cards for most, photos as keepsakes to remember our time spent together), there’s still a whole lot left to do: putting notes in for some people, sorting out the 115 photo prints I ordered to gift to some folks, stamping them and addressing them. I know PiC would help but he and I have VERY different ideas of when these things should be done and it’s less annoying to me to do it than to rush him. I’d rather have him do other things that I don’t like and where the timeline doesn’t bother me. He’ll do all the food and car packing up when we travel, for example, or scrub the sink (hate), the toilets (hate), and maintain the cars.
:: How was your week? Are you ready for the holidays?
December 6, 2019
1. JB was treated to a movie at the theater, and we ran into quite a few of zir classmates (boys and girls alike, boy is that movie popular) which was bonus excitement for zir. I hardly remember the first movie but Frozen 2 was really quite entertaining.
2. With some help, I made a few jars of my “liquid gold” to give away to friends who I never know what to give in return for their food gifts. This is the only thing they’ve ever requested and I make this soup stock once a year, if that.
3. We hosted a mini Friendsgiving the day after Thanksgiving. A couple of friends who didn’t make a turkey came over and dined on our set aside turkey. It was perfect and then we wound up the night talking about emergency preparedness and what we still need. I broke out our water filter for the first time in 8 years, and we figured out how to put it together. We also may do disaster preparedness practice runs together – Emergency Food Fridays, anyone? I have been pushing PiC to do this because I want us to be totally prepared for emergencies and disasters. *Totally prepared = where it’s muscle memory and not us fumbling around trying to figure out how to arrange the basics: lights, clean water, heating up food safely indoors, staying warm, etc.
4. I deeply appreciate my warm sweatpants that fit. I could live in these. I have to fight the urge to go buy five more as an overreaction to many years of ill fitting clothes. Is this just me? Anytime I find something I like, I want one more in case I can’t find it again but I also wear things until their doom (usually at least 5 years, more like 8-10) by which point it’s possible my taste or standards may have changed so why not let it go and find a new thing?
This may be a deeply ingrained reflex from my pre-tailoring things to fit and pre-Petite sizes era. Back then, nothing ever really fit and if it did I wasn’t likely to get lucky again in that clothing group. I was always going about in oversized and poor fitting clothes.
5. While I tackled a page long To Do list on Sunday, with JB’s help at times, PiC cleaned the sink, vacuumed, did all the laundry, changed the sheets for our guest room to prepare for our next house guest and cooked dinner. I was so focused on all the things I needed to get done that I didn’t quite realize what he was doing the whole time. Naturally, I appreciate him like you wouldn’t believe.
6. I was in charge of ordering a ton of alcohol gifts for the family. I started my order over the weekend and happened across two stackable promotions to get 2 bottles of whisky plus a mini, 12 bottles of wine, and a whole case of beer for $187. Note to self, plan ahead. Next year’s supply of alcohol to serve guests and for gifts – buy on Cyber Monday!
7. I tried adding a half cup of baking soda to the wash drum + vinegar in the fabric softener dish for JB’s funny smelling sheets, and PiC’s workout clothes, and they don’t smell terrible anymore! Huzzah!
8. How is it Thursday already?? (Right now as I type this.) JB and I both went to the dentist and got our teeth cleaned and is there anything more dentally satisfying than a professional cleaning?? I love how clean our teeth are and I’m loaded up on advice for how to take better care of our teeth and gums. I have some gum recession šš and I’m more afraid of dental recession than a financial one these days. So, brushing and flossing diligently, as we’ve been doing, but I have to wear my night guard every night now.
:: How was your week?
November 29, 2019
1. More catalog removals: still trying to get ourselves removed from American Girl. How did I ever get on their mailing list? I have never liked or been interested in their products. Their site is also supremely annoying. The opt out is so dysfunctional it took 7 tries. They require a birth date to enter this part of the site, then it kept freezing, then suggesting there were errors in the address that I entered (there weren’t), and then freezing again. After 7 failed attempts, I had to just email them.
2. We managed to sign up for another month of swim lessons despite leaving it til the last minute. I’m assuming it was still open because of the holidays. Nevertheless, woots!
3. Happened to spot that a Twitter / blogger friend needed a helping hand late at night, and I’m glad to have spotted it because we were able to help. It’s nice when things come together.
4. We had a really rough Sunday so I’m extra grateful that my favorite relative being here for moral support and actual physical support with walking the dogs and cooking and all the things that make up our days. I hate that the thing happened at all, but if it had to, I suppose it’s helpful that it happened when we have some support.
5. I’ve had senioritis all week because we have a short week. That seems counterintuitive. But the short work week also means more stress because there’s no real way to pause my work so I’ll have to work a bit over the weekend.
6. Tiny dogs make good lapwarmers.
7. A visit from my favorite relative means JB has been in good spirits all week long. Cheeky, definitely, but generally very little grumpiness.
8. We pulled together another big round for our Lakota families and that was amazing. Update is forthcoming.
PONDERING 1: Should we keep my once-beloved SPG AMEX which has now become the Marriott Bonvoy? Our free night benefit isn’t so easy for us to use given our current constraints and the annual reward is usually how I justify keeping an annual fee card. I can still transfer points to miles if I wanted to go that route but that doesn’t address the annual fee. Thinking on this one.
PONDERING 2: I finally separated the cash from the rental property into its own savings account several months ago and it earns a small amount in interest every month. Like $5. I currently funnel all interest from our emergency savings account into our “Director” fund (the account from which I make all our savings and investing contributions and the occasional spending disbursement as necessary). We pay taxes on all the interest now, whether or not I keep it separated, but should I continue to keep it separate on a matter of principle? Seems like I should. Thoughts welcome!
November 22, 2019
1. We had a dear friend come stay with us for the weekend. We haven’t spent time with them in months and this was a very nice visit. I got curious to see how much use our guest room gets annually, this year was a low occupancy year, so I checked our calendar. We’ve hosted 6 separate individuals or family groups for a total of 39 days. We normally would have closer to about 50 days in a year, but fewer separate individuals/groups. We use that room as a laundry room in between visits so that I’m not cluttering up our sofa with to be folded clothes, so it gets good use year-round.
2. We had another unplanned visit from PiC’s friends and he had a good time catching up with them. JB was over the moon because those friends brought over their infant and ze loves wee babies. The wee baby really liked zir, too. Luckily I like these friends.
3. I’m pretty happy with my change to our spending/saving spreadsheet style over to a checkbook register style than a single calendar view. Again, it’s imperfect because I have many needs and desires for tracking our money but I am quite happy with this current iteration. It lets me get more granular than my calendar vies did before and I can much more easily keep an eye on when expenses get really lumpy and our checking account runs low. This is good. FOR NOW. š
4. I tried using an Oxi-Clean paste to scrub our bathroom grout and it worked really well! My hands hurt like the dickens because there is such a thing as overenthusiastic scrubbing but boy is that grout clean.
5. Did you know that Target does price matching? I don’t know why I keep forgetting that but it solved my mini-dilemma about a gift that would have been cheaper on Amazon. The CSR on chat was able to get that done in a minute.
6. We’re slowly making the last of our charitable contributions for the year.
Just thinking: I’ve been pondering things I want to add to our lives but we can’t yet accommodate in our regular budget. For JB, self defense lessons, $100/month. For me, Pilates classes specifically geared towards seniors and people with disabilities, $200/month (but also, time, who has it??). For Sera, one training consultation, $300/each (holy moly. This is the one training group that comes recommended by a rescue group we have history with, I can’t even get other trainers to return my call). For all of us, $$$$$ for home maintenance projects we need to complete. I also need orthodontia work and have made some initial inquiries into Invisalign but I really don’t feel ready to face it yet.
:: If you have grout and tile cleaning secrets, please share! I really need a more energy efficient way than “spend an hour on each 3×3 scrubbing til my hands hurt”.