August 21, 2014
Funny about Money, that is. I swear VH does more in a day than I do in some weeks but every so often, I find myself channeling her.
This was my version, recently….
1. Wake late for the second time. Having gone to sleep around 2-3 am after working too late, fail to appreciate Seamus’s charming morning check-in around 6:30 or 7 wherein he confirms I’m here and alive. I notice this is a thing that’s never concerned Doggle. PiC thankfully does their morning routine and I get a lick more sleep.
2. Rouse to give dogs their morning meds.
3. Swipe myself into some semblence of order and hygiene. Set down to work.
4. Check all the emails, clear out the FYI stuff that I cannot unsubscribe from but rarely read. Can’t filter because some subject lines are too similar.
5. Start a load of laundry.
6. Answer newbie questions.
7. Load the dishwasher. Ponder as my technique, not having grown up running a dishwasher, is still evolving. Recently had a long conversation with Anne of Unique Gifter about her technique and fabulous dishwasher. We haven’t had a successful, totally clean load for a few rounds now and I’m questioning everything: is the detergent crapped out? Is it my loading? Is it the washer? (I still think it’s me..)
8. Review the pile of stuff I have to check and approve.
9. Remember I haven’t eaten breakfast. It’s noon. Throw together something like a quesadilla; wave at Doggle who, whenever he’s saved part of his breakfast, will eat with me.
10. Cram food in my mouth as I clear more emails.
11. Start second load of wash.
12. Frantically run to a doctor’s appointment, find out it’ll take no less than an hour. Goody.
13. Get home and dive back into work, juggling Swagbucks on the side.
14. Remember that I haven’t finished booking parts of our upcoming trip and take a break to get that done.
15. Synapses connect and realize that the first load of wash was super heavy because it was still too wet, not because I was weak with hunger. Drag it back out and toss it in for an extra spin. Thankful we have an extra spin option and that I didn’t start the dryer while I let that puzzle simmer.
16. Seamus still needs a sitter for a while and we’ve struck out with half a dozen possibilities and another half a dozen options never answered. Not impressed with DogVacay at this point but neither am I thrilled about (or even mildly happy with) kennel options.
17. Start to stress out big time. Have a vent on Twitter to a couple friends for ten minutes to blow off steam, then buckle back down.
18. Read all the fine print of booking train tickets. Way too much silliness to do with times and delivery options. Everyone should let us print at home or view the email on phone screen as standard options that don’t cost extra!!
19. Post-booking, comb through TripIt itinerary to delete the last bits of my last mistake: booked a hotel near a train station but wrong train station. And then wrong date. Luckily hotel reservations are the easiest thing to cancel or rebook as long as you remember to actually do it.
20. Start to breathe, stop again as I dive back answering newbie emails and my own projects.
21. Resurface briefly to throw dinner ingredients in the oven. Thank whatever that while I joke that PiC has to eat what I make, he’s actually quite happy to. He supplements my baked chicken breasts topped with sliced onions, tomatoes and lemon with a garlic onion green bean concoction. Was that with butter? I can’t tell. It was great but a touch salty, mine was good but a touch dry. I could really go for a steak right now. Baked potato on the side. Cooked by someone not me.
22. Back to work.
23. Oh but stop and translate a menu. As a favor to PiC whose hands were already full with related organizing, I took over arranging a dinner for a horde of people. But the menu required translation first and in doing so, I culled most of it, making an executive decision we’d have a set menu with few choices and those would be whatever I could translate. Kick the whole multi-course list to PiC for approval and mentally plan to make up a survey to collect orders tomorrow.
24. Back to work and Swagbucks. This is all meant to fund some ongoing expenses we have and alleviate the pinch on our cash flow. Since I’m in front of the computer anyway, most days I can eke out some points without too much distraction. Other days I let it distract me from buckling down which isn’t good.
25. Drag all the dry laundry out and shake it out on the guest bed. PiC will be a good soul and actually make up the bed later.
26. Fold and store the dog towels, hang the guest towels. Things are coming together.
27. More work. Fight with Amazon for an hour for being stupid and stealing my gift card money weeks before shipping my subscribe and save items. What’s up with that?? Hugely annoyed.
28. Write up some more guidelines for people who’ll need them. Realize I could work straight through the next morning but then I’d be all discombobulated for Seamus’s vet appointment.
I keep thinking that if I power through just one or two more days, it’ll all come together but that’s starting to sound like a load of hooey. Serves me right bringing home Seamus! Among other things…
June 6, 2014
“You don’t have to eat in the dark,” calls out PiC, sounding vaguely concerned that I’d finally lost my frugal mind and refused to use electricity for just one person. He doesn’t have to say it, I know he’s thinking it.
It’a not untrue that I was choosing not to turn on the light because it was just me and my croissant at the table, but that wasn’t the whole of it. I could see well enough in the near dark, but sometimes it’s just kind of nice to sit in the quiet night, with a snack, maybe poking through a blog. You’d think I get enough alone time, working mostly away from people everyday and seeing only PiC most days of the week. It’s a darn good thing I married a man whose company I actually enjoy in spades!It’s been a lot of long weeks, slogging through work day after work night after work day, in the midst of a fairly intense episode of fatigue, pain and more fatigue. But it’s also been a lot of exciting stuff going on too, taking up all my energy and brain space. I can see light at the end of the tunnel and even if I need more recovery time than ever to struggle up to the surface, it’s still pretty cool that I’ve pulled this off. I can share some of it in a month or two, probably, once the loose ends are tied up.
In the meantime, introspection in the dark is just what the doctor would order, I think, if I actually found a good therapist who’d recommend that which was soothing to my soul.
I feel like Mal at the end of the first episode of Firefly: my best effort today was only 2/3 good enough, I worked til 1 am the day before so was dragging from sleep deprivation, PiC had to pick up my slack from this week and run to the vet for Doggle’s ridiculously expensive medication and do the grocery run for me, arriving home exhausted, late and grumpy. I’d managed to make a soup but it wasn’t enough to serve as a meal for a normal human that expends energy so even my “sorry I couldn’t run the errands but have a nice dinner” gesture was… Well, inadequate. In an attempt to thank me for trying to make the day end nicely, he knocked a glass over and spilled water all over my pants, in a move that is so typically ME (confession: I forgot how to work a glass two days ago and spilled water all down my front); it was just so absurd we had to laugh.
But at the end of the day, we’re still flying.
Little as that may seem, it’s enough.
(By the by, I did figure out the old family recipe and made it twice without disaster, so I’m calling that a win.)
May 26, 2014
Even though it’s a two and a half hour drive away, I think my favorite present (aside from delicious food since we haven’t actually really done birthday presents in years) has been our family membership to the Monterey Bay Aquarium.
As gifts go, considering we don’t manage to use the membership very often, it’s really a luxury.
But I do so love presents that both give me what I love (OTTERS) and support a good cause (Marine life exhibition care and education; conservation and science programs). They spend 64% of their money on those very things, so probably they could do a bit better but I really love the site, I love how kid and adult friendly it is (if you haven’t played with a kid in their play area, you really should!) and it’s just … peaceful and lovely.
We recently met some volunteers who’d been working there for more than 20 years, which I think is rather incredible, and speaks to the dedication of the community to some degree.
Memberships are tax-deductible (a PF blogger favorite) and include free admission for one year, express entry and discounts.
What’s your favorite birthday gift?
March 6, 2014
Yes, we’re American but stag & hen is just easier to say. 🙂
I was just being grateful that at my age, most of my friends have gone past needing some ridiculous pre-wedding party, with a few exceptions (notably, a recent invitation that I declined that was composed of an overnight stay, bookended by multiple expensive activities).
But no, I was wrong. Gone are the days of having a group of friends get together for a relatively inexpensive spa day, or night off drinks and dancing or whatever it is we did back in the day as broke college grads. Now we’re seeing people ask their friends to fly across country, or meet up at a destination city, there to party it up for a full weekend. Between gifts, time-off, lodgings, travel arrangements, most of these seem to be $1000 minimum.
My physical therapist was just telling me about the great deal her boyfriend got, going to Mexico for “just $1000” for his friend’s stag party! *blink*
“All inclusive” is nice but $1000 for a weekend party with the boys (or girls) is a deal? When did that become the norm?
It almost feels like I woke up one day and our friends all became “wealthy” without us. To be fair, PiC’s friends are actually truly well-off, so it’s really not terribly surprising that a few thousand here and there isn’t cause for pause for them.
I don’t have any philosophical issues with destination weddings: that’s where the couple wants to go? Fine. And invitees are free to go, or not go, according to their time and budget constraints.
But stag and hen parties? They feel a little more like hostage negotiation when you’re part of the wedding party and the relevant betrothed is asking: so, what do you think of going to [insert international destination, during high season]? Y’all, when you need a passport for the pre-wedding party, I have objections.
We’ll have honest conversations with the friends, of course, because we’re simply not lining up to spend a few thousand dollars between the stag party, gifts and travel to the wedding; it’s not their fault but let’s face it, every wedding we attend requires travel these days.
There just aren’t that many people that we can spend that kind of money on, especially not with a friend getting married every year or two and oh, living our lives?
I’ve organized my fair share of these, there was the memorable year I ‘maided for 4 brides in 1 summer, but this remains too rich for my blood. Neither PiC or I got either stag/hen parties and I didn’t get a bridal shower, and our budget’s pretty happy about that.
How do you feel about these things? Fun and worth doing as a “once in a lifetime”? Or does it make you want to call for a simpler life? Or somewhere in between?
February 7, 2014
There’s nothing that chaps my ass as much as stupid mistakes, unless it’s stupid decisions that cost me money. Unless it’s stupid, aka shortsighted, decisions that costs me a lot of money.
Part of our auto insurance just spiked by more than 50% because my dad got two tickets in the last two years, and made the foolish decision to pay the fine in court ($100) instead of going to traffic school ($250). Not only did he make this decision on his own without discussing it with me, he never mentioned the tickets at all.
He meant well but clearly he wasn’t thinking of the long term effects. I had to explain to him that his $150 savings will now actually cost me over $1000 in the next two and three years in raised insurance premiums.
He’s now paying for his daily expenses (food, gas, utilities) and stupid crap like tickets, but not for housing or insurance yet. I’m not pushing the issue because I’m keeping an eye on the regularity of the utility payments and have had to make a couple supplemental payments in December as he’s not keeping up with them regularly, he’s still learning how to budget on an irregular budget.
As I suspected when we agreed that he was going to start taking on the regular monthly stuff like utilities, there’s not been a word from him about getting behind in payments. It seems he’ll simply won’t learn or change on that front, so my instinct not to trust him to talk to me instead of finding himself slowly being boiled in (debt) water that’s been heating up over time was right.
It’s not going to break us but our carefully constructed budget is going to take a hit unless I can find a way to cut back somewhere else to compensate. Which, again, chaps my ass.
*deep yoga breathing*
I managed to talk to him about the consequences of his short term decisions, without losing my temper, but it was tough keeping a lid on it. The damage is done, so there’s no use hollering about it.
This is NOT what I meant when I said I wanted Stupid Money.
I’m not alone, am I? (Misery does love company, sometimes.)
December 9, 2013
Our favorite guesting ritual is cooking a meal for our hosts.
There’s always a bit of shuffling figuring out what to make and cooking in an unfamiliar kitchen but cooking a nice meal for hardworking (often parent) friends and cleaning up for them’s a nice way to give them a bit of a break and thank them at the same time.
For our new parent friends especially, going out is not so much the fun and easy time that it used to be. Depending on the age of the kids, and the parenting style, they’re generally on the hook for crying, projectile food, running, screaming… all ingredients for a good time, right? Â It’s just easier to eat at home and weird as it is, PiC and I always enjoy a good ramble through the grocery stores wherever we travel.
Grocery shopping in Hawaii was one hell of an eye-opener.
The ingredients for a basic taco night for four adults and 1 child, which probably would have cost about $30 even here in the Bay Area, was a shocking $60. Granted, I wasn’t buying on sale cycles like normal, and didn’t have any coupons either but still, I’m certain we could manage turkey tacos for less than that on the mainland.
That included: 2 lbs of ground turkey, taco seasoning, hard taco shells, tortillas, onions, 5 avocados for guacamole, 2 limes, 1 bag of chips, a few tomatos, and shredded cheese.
I walked the rest of the produce section and aisles to get a feel for the rest of the store and it was equally scary.
Milk is consistently expensive, running between $9-10 per gallon; kale cost 3x more than I would normally pay (between $1-2 per bundle on the mainland; $5 on the island); bananas that are usually between 29-79 cents per pound were $2.49/lb. Â Apples were nearly $4/lb; and cereal ran $7-9/box.
We often joke that we can’t afford to feed another mouth around here, PiC snacks enough for three and meals that would serve 4-6 don’t last past the first sitdown, so paradisiacal as Hawaii is, we couldn’t even afford to feed ourselves there!
We’re so spoiled by how reasonable food prices are, even in the Bay Area, and especially in Southern California.
December 4, 2013
The question is pretty simple, really: should I get (do I really need) a wedding band?
PiC is in favor.
I am opposed.
My argument:
1. I already have a perfectly lovely engagement ring that he spent a fair amount of money on a few years ago. It does the job just fine and we’ve got to get about ten years of continuous wear out of it before I stop trying to calculate the amortized cost.
2. It does double duty: gem facing up = engagement! gem facing my palm = wedding! I just turn the ring around when I want to see just a band and I’m all set.
3. I don’t even get to wear this ring (or anything) all the time because I have Sausage Fingers Days where I risk the ring cutting off all circulation to my phalanges. What’s the point in getting a second ring that I can’t wear much either?
4. If I were to buy a band, there’s this sense that it has to match this ring. And it’d be nice to like that. That costs … more than I want to spend. A case of champagne taste for a (non craft) beer budget.
PiC’s argument:
Because I said so.
Obviously, I’m just trawling the Internet for support of my cheapy ways but seeing as how Twitter folk have turned on me and supported PiC more than once, it’s not a sure bet. Come on guys, say I’m right!
