By: Revanche

Settling for living on the edge

March 10, 2009

Sometimes, I think I’ll never understand my parents. In some ways, they seem just like kids.

Our lines of parenthood and daughterhood have become blurred, redrawn, fuzzed over, drawn again and scuffed up. That happens with most relationships, I think, over time, so I’m not worried that it’s happened. It’s just a little whelming to try and prepare for the future only to hear my dad tell me that they’ll be fine at this rather subsistence level of living because, “Everyone else does it, and what would we do with luxury anyway?”

Uh, having basic health needs met in a timely manner is a luxury? Having to wait 4-6 months to have your general physician get back to you about rescheduling a follow-up is acceptable? Therefore, long term care insurance is a luxury? Maybe I’ve become spoiled, but my idea of basic health insurance does not mean the same thing as it does to them. They’ve become accustomed to the kind of care available to the indigent, and I don’t want that to be the rest of their lives.

Aside from that, let’s be honest here: the insurance is helpful to me and my sanity. We come as a pair, you don’t want us separated. As I’ve pointed out before, my dad is mom’s primary caretaker. I bring in the income. So if anything happens to dad? This already precarious house of cards come tumblin’ down.

I get that he doesn’t want me to be paying out more money, I get that he doesn’t want me “risking” any more. But I don’t get the logic of “don’t create a cushion for later on by spending a small amount now.” Talk about penny-wise, pound-foolish. Either he’s simply lost all perspective and today’s dollar is worth way more than tomorrow’s ten (and sanity, and breathing space) or he just doesn’t want to quit smoking.

At this point, I just hope it’s the latter.

Related reading links:
Lazy Man and Money’s Helping Parents Cope with Damage to Their Retirement Nest Egg

3 Responses to “Settling for living on the edge”

  1. Miss M says:

    My dad is financially incompetent but he makes a lot of money and will probably work until the day he dies, that keeps him afloat. I don’t understand how anyone could be happy with crappy healthcare, my dogs get better care at the vet than people get down at the low cost clinic. The vet calls to follow up, you get blood test results the next day….

  2. Health care = issue in all countries either due to cost or time.

    I don’t like dealing with it, but at least there’s the option? Right? silver lining? bright side?

    Oh and your dad smoking — huge no no, and so it my writing “no no” as proper English.

    My dad used to smoke, caused me to have asthma attacks so he quit. *shrug* And then he got cancer….. but not of the lungs luckily.

  3. Revanche says:

    Miss M: I know! I’m personally spoiled because I’ve had an HMO through my job for nearly 5 years but their health case is just .. shoddy.

    FB: Yeah, one way or another, it’s a problem.

    Drives me mad that he still smokes, for so many reasons.

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