December 16, 2019
I’m still working at preparing for a disaster and creating coherent and complete kits. We’ve been working at this for years and we’re still not done because it takes time to fit these expenses in the budget. I’m not willing to just buy one of those big kits because I’m looking for long-lasting value which means spending a bit more for quality.
Background
I shared my friend’s expertise on hurricane insurance in 2013. I summarized what we had on hand and what I was thinking for 2017. Things we already have:
Hydration:
- Two water filtration systems purchased almost a decade ago for cooking and drinking if we have no potable water
- 3 days of water packets
- I wonder if a lifestraw would be good to have as well.
Food:
Light:
Energy:
- An outdoor only generator that could keep our refrigerator (and maybe internet assuming those towers are still up) running plus two extension cords to keep it far away from the house. We need some extra gas for the generator and a safe place to store it not in the house.
- I picked up a massive power bank for the household to share and to have a back up to our smaller more portable power bank that I use regularly. This can be used to (very slowly) charge my computer when we just have a power outage, too.
Heat/warmth:
- Sleeping bivvies in case we have to sleep outdoors.
Health:
- A tourniquet for major bleeding,
- Swiss army knife,
- Bandaids,
- Gauze and medical tape.
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October 16, 2017
I’ve written about being prepared for pet problems, considering a wide range of What Ifs and preparing for them, and financial preparedness in my In Case of Emergency series focused on getting a household in order for the worst possible scenarios. I started this post for a few reasons, but the disastrous wildfires in Santa Rosa no more than a couple hours away from us has made this even more compelling. One of our community members, DadsDollarsDebts was directly affected by the fire and had to escape with only minutes to get out, so I’m sharing this post earlier to join the Chain in hopes that we’ll motivate more people to get prepared, sooner.
This was a full to the brim month with oh, moving, and closing on our old place, and settling into the new place, and figuring out how to work everything.
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July 26, 2010
I was going to answer all the comments on this post, but my response is long enough to be a post of its own.
I’m not jumping into any fires. I might have moved in but I haven’t completely lost my mind. We’re not sharing money at this point, but we’re sharing some expenses and combining our money philosophies to create something we can both be happy with.
Most importantly – you wouldn’t realize this because you don’t know him so it’s only fair to point it out – he wouldn’t ask me to take on any more, and especially not his mortgage in truth.
He was joking about that and I understood that. I only parsed out what I could shoulder to illustrate how he needs to be prepared if he were to quit his job. And he may well be, but he wouldn’t foolishly up and walk out either.
CaitlinO pointed out that if I’m not splitting all the bills down the middle, he’s subsidizing my lifestyle/savings/family responsibilities. True. And I’m not thrilled with that but the truth is, what I bring to the table is a lot of financial knowledge and a willingness to dig in to any financial situation and improve it. He points out time and again that what I bring to the table is every bit as valuable as the mortgage he pays because I’ll take care of our long term financial health.
I love that my blog friends are so smart, y’all see some part of the truth of what I was sharing:
Frugal Zeitgeist is absolutely right: “the best thing you could possibly do for both of you is be his work cheerleader and number one fan while working together to figure out a backup plan that doesn’t involve bankrupting you. With your good sense as a guide, it sounds like between the two of you, you’ll find a way.”
That’s exactly what I was doing. Using myself as an example, I was sharing with him the economic breakdown of what we’d need to be able to do in a dire situation.
SingleMa understood exactly the spirit of my comment: “It wasn’t a commitment I chose to take on but our relationship is and this is part of the game.”
That made me smile. 🙂 I hope everything works out with your SO’s situation.
Thank you, SingleMa, for seeing the spirit of my post.
Sense made me laugh: also, does he have an e-fund of his own to fall back on? that might make the situation easier to handle, knowing that you’re combining your Forces. You know, ‘Power of The E-Funds Unite!’ and you could get shiny rings and place them together whenever you needed to draw on your new improved dual powers. 🙂
I love this. We totally need Power Fund Rings. He doesn’t have what I consider a good e-fund for his obligations but this situation has enlightened him more to the need. Slowly but surely, I’m turning a spender into less of a spender?
Crystal pointed out the very thing I don’t want to face, what could happen if I didn’t share with him my accountanty brain: Life works out most of the time, but I hope PiC doesn’t quit until he finds something better. Toxic sucks, but so will the fights that start when you start feeling used…or at least, that’s what happened to us.
Funny About Money: If he’s that unhappy with the job, I hope he’s looking elsewhere. It’s a lot easier to get a job when you’ve got a job.
If he’s not at risk of being fired, it might be good for him to consider what my tax lawyer once said when I wanted nothing more than to get away from the Great Desert University: “A sh*tty job is better than no job.”
Not at risk, no, but there’s absolutely every reason for him to find a better place before he becomes so unhappy there IS a risk.
July 19, 2010
“Can you pay the mortgage for a while?”
If you hear that high-pitched squealing, it’s either my tires peeling out of the garage, or the whistle of my brain on overdrive.
PiC wasn’t totally serious when he asked, it was really just out of frustration. He’s been going through a rough patch at the job and it’s at a point where I think it’s toxic. Having been there, I know from toxic and I know it’s insidious. You develop defense mechanisms that are hard to break and stop trusting people. He needs a major change or at the very least, the comfort of knowing that if he wanted or needed to jump ship, he’s financially able to. You know, the e-fund!
As much as I practice financial responsibility here, I don’t preach it everywhere and especially not to someone who is meant to be a partner. We have our differences and discuss them rationally to find a compromise. That said, of course there’s a corner of my brain that goes “poof” like a small atomic bomb. “Why?!?!” it screeches.
Not “why would you lean on me?” and not “why would you even think about quitting?” I know the answers to those questions and I’m fine with it. It’s a very simple “why did you wait until nooowwww to think about this??”
Ok. That’s my vent. Onward we go.
I did a quick verbal calculation for him: worst case scenario, I could support the both of us, and my family, for about 9 months using the cash I have on hand. That would completely drain my cash holdings without accounting for the incoming paychecks. (That is not, as we all know from the unemployment rolls, a very long time.)
At some point in the near future, very near, we’ll have to discuss a more realistic plan than burning bridges or stewing in a bad work environment for the sake of a paycheck, chained down by a mortgage. It wasn’t a commitment I chose to take on but our relationship is and this is part of the game.
If there’s a bright side to this situation, we’ll be talking much more frankly and proactively about money than ever before. And that’s a good thing in my book.
Click here to see the follow-up post, comments and further explanation.
October 20, 2008
A chunk at a time, (sometimes literally), the material possessions in my life are being reduced, digitized and eliminated, or picked over. I found myself choosing NOT to sign up for free samples just because they were free, a holdover habit from my uber-Fatwalleting days, knowing that I have a packet of said samples that have yet to be used. I’m passing up Walgreens FAR items that I won’t immediately use, or won’t be able to find a home for. CVS ExtraBucks items are carefully considered and not purchased solely for the sake of generating EBucks. Not that I ever really got into that last, but was gearing up to. There’s very judicious stockpiling of essentials only.
I like this trend, and that the only remaining accumulation is in my savings accounts. My fellow LA-area bloggers, Well-Heeled and Stacking Pennies, are doing remarkably well with their emergency/Freedom Funds and asked how much would make you feel safe or comfortable?
I feel a bit like Chicken Little when I think “just add a few more months’ worth to the e-fund,” but then I read comments like this one on Boston Gal’s post, Keep debt low and cash high:
Puddle Jump Photo said:
My husband has been laid off twice in the past 18 months and all of emergency money is gone…so right now…it’s just trying to stay afloat!
and I remember that my own family’s troubles over the last seven or eight years, for numerous reasons, and it suddenly doesn’t seem unreasonable to want just a few thousand more banked away.
That’s not to say that I’m entirely fatalistic, I certainly can’t be with the progress made over the last few years. I’m just feeling more and more cautious and less willing to take risks with my money or my career. That’s probably not the worst thing right now.
June 19, 2008
No sooner do I mostly clear up the bloggy debacle, I get an email from my cell phone company saying that access has temporarily been blocked from online access because someone repeatedly, unsuccessfully, tried to log onto my account.
What???
I called, and apparently at 12:28, today, someone was trying to access my accounts.
Either someone really has it in their head that they need to snoop, or Yodlee was trying to log on. I can’t tell which, but I’ve changed all my passwords again. *aigh*
Let this be a lesson to you, folks, protect your passwords and make them nonsensical to anyone but yourselves!