October 27, 2009
There are some days when it feels like the big bad news is torrential, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. Usually you can’t. But there’s almost always something you can try to make it better: use your words.
vs. State of California
I called EDD five times a day since reading that letter, caught in the mill of bureaucracy. I kicked myself, over and over, for scheduling my trip for the exact day that they wanted a phone interview. “But,” I thought, “nothing I can do but keep on calling.” Until I really listened to the voice prompts, and realized one day that they change slightly. They mentioned Saturday service during which most services would not be offered but that representatives would be available to help log online requests. You’d better believe I was all over that website again, searching for that elusive online option. I found a series of drop down menus that would suffice, and I wrote a thorough explanation for why a phone interview wasn’t necessary. They provided a list of some 20-odd questions I had to be prepared to answer: I answered all of them in that form. At the end of it, I clicked “send” with a prayer.
Result: Win.
vs. county of San Diego
Immediately after receiving those fines, I fired off letters disputing the Toll Evasion Accusations. In detail, I pointed out all the problems with paying a toll for which the amount was unstated. I stopped short of making any nasty comments and offered to pay the original toll fee.
Result: 80% Win. They want me to pay the original toll, plus $10 (vs. the original $50 fee) to cover their collection and processing. To justify this, they’re calling the judgment “we’re right, but we’ll reduce the fee this one time for you. Just pay our costs.” Uh huh. Jerks.
$39 cost to me, with a $120 discount.
vs. online class instructor
On a short quiz of only 10 questions, with a forced completion time, the percentage point loss when two of the questions are poorly worded is substantial. I ran the possible equations, closed my eyes and picked a set of answers to submit – and lost the 50/50 gamble. I sent the instructor an email letting him know the questions were ambiguous, and that I had run the numbers correctly supposing one of two interpretations. I didn’t ask for my points back since he had to first acknowledge that my interpretations were valid.
Result: Win. The HTML had incorrectly rendered his text, and the question was posted incorrectly. Points were returned to me.
Have you argued or negotiated your way to victory lately? Will you, now? Do share! I’ve got a few more pots on the stove bubbling away, I’ll fill you in on those when the incubation period is over.
December 7, 2008
Am worn out from trying to make up my day. Arrived home at 5 pm, had a short whirlwind of activity: did two loads of laundry, ate a little bit, showered, cleaned the tub, boiled eggs for tomorrow. Now, exhausted, so am giving up on job apps, organizing photographs, writing cards. Was rousted out of bed this morning to go to BF’s house to check on his dog. His sister was alone, distraught as their 15+ year old dog’s somewhat neurological behaviors and unsteadiness increased, so I went to keep her company and tender what advice I could.
Precious little advice it was, too. He’s had a good long life, and we’ve been blessed to have him this long after last year’s tragedies, but it was clearly his time to go. Finally, he had such rough bout of difficulty breathing after a bit of activity that I was about to recommend that they call the vet and let him go more peacefully when he passed on his own.
I was able to make a few calls and make arrangements since I used to work at the local vet’s, so that spared the family some little bit of stress.
I’m glad I could be there to help in BF’s place, but I fervently wish that after losing their father, their cousin and now their beloved family pet, we can be spared the need to hold vigil, please, for at least another couple of years. I know life’s not fair, but this is getting to be a bit much.
December 5, 2008
An official announcement hasn’t been made, but the word is that our entire staff is likely to be laid off in a few months. You might know that SOP for layoffs is denial until the moment of truth, no matter how wrong I think that is.
Call it naivete, but I certainly did not expect to run a gamut of emotions when my prediction months ago was confirmed. Keeping in mind the huge numbers of people being laid off, at best, I expected frustration, a little tiny bit of vindication that I was right, and a readiness to move on. It turns out I’m not that simple. And that I play devil’s advocate with myself even when I’m upset. Read on ….
Exasperation
There are about ten thousand ways that this could have been prevented. Really. This is not a poor-economy related issue, this was a bad management issue, and it’s no surprise.
Anger
Unsurprised or not, it ticks me off, royally, that management wouldn’t change their ways even when we were in a poor negotiating position. They continued to act as though they had the power to make demands, break promises and generally acted the fools. That led directly to the current situation.
Anxiety
I’m not ready for this! I associate unemployment with (immediate) brokeness. Even though I know approximately how many months I would last without a drop of income, there’s still a visceral reaction that a major emergency will eat up all that money and I’ll immediately go into debt trying to survive without a steady paycheck. That’s silly. I’ve taken a few months off between jobs, without having a job, having less in the bank before. Yes, that was four years ago when the outlook wasn’t terrible and I wasn’t paying all household expenses. But I’ve got the budget, the e-fund, the cushion. And it’s not like I haven’t supported other friends while they downsized and job-hunted and become re-employed in the last six months. This is survivable.
Shame
Even though I brought my A-game every single day, regardless of the politics and turmoil, I’m actually a little ashamed that I didn’t manage to save us. And is there stigma attached to being laid off? Even in this environment? There shouldn’t be, and I can confidently state that it’s through no fault of my own. My performance and abilities are respected, even if it feels like management’s failures reflect on me.
Helplessness/Depression
This wasn’t advertised except to a select few but I’ve been preparing and job-hunting during the last few months. My tolerance for the BS was about to crack spectacularly so I took steps to prevent going postal. The resume was perfected in August, and I’ve been quietly applying to new jobs while working insane hours and trying to keep up with everything else. Nothing has resulted so far, and even though I know, intellectually, that the job search while holding a full time job combined with a downturn in the economy means that it’s going to take longer, I still can’t help but mentally wring my hands for a minute. Or file this under frustration.
Confusion
How are the people who DO know the intimate details managing to pretend everything is status quo?
Loss
There’s a sense of regret that a huge part of my life is going away. Why on earth would I feel like I’m losing something leaving this job? It’s been a major source of frustration and negativity for months. Yet, there it is.
De-motivation
I’m not at all inspired to work, work hard, and work well today. Considering I work through natural disasters, this is a little different. Because of the combination of the above emotions, I just don’t care today. It doesn’t matter whether or not I perform well today, as I did yesterday or the day before that. I’m still going to be out of a job. Except that’s not true. I still have my pride and self-respect, and at the end of the day, that’s what I’ll be taking home with me. Among other things I’ll be taking home with me: my work laptop, that lovely new spindle of CD-RWs, and a lifetime supply of pens and toilet paper. Nick at Punny Money says it’s ok.
I’m kidding!!!
So the other side of all this? Barring the part where I’m not making any money because that’s not good no matter how you spin it, this is motivation to search even more diligently for a new job while I still have one.
Opportunity
This is a chance to start fresh, and that’s not such a bad thing. Sure, being the bottom of the employment totem pole is not where I want to be, but there’s nothing saying that that’s the only place I’ll get hired. I’m not entry-level, I’ve got great skills, I work damn hard, and have an excellent reputation. Now I have to learn to sell whatever doesn’t shine through in a cover letter and resume.
At the end of the day, Pandora’s Box still had one important thing to give, and that’s what I’ll hold on to: Hope. Hope that better things are still to come, hope that I’m resilient enough to handle this change, hope that this isn’t the straw that breaks this camel’s back after all the nonsense that’s gone before. (Hope that this time next year I won’t be reporting that I’m completely broke, in debt and at the end of my rope……!)
Faith
Despite all the negativity and doubt, deep down, I still have faith that there are ways to get past this rather ugly situation. There are, I just have to find and implement them.
Relief
In my frustration after my farce of a review early this year, I decided that I wanted to be ready to pick up my purse and saunter out without a moment’s regret. That’s how ticked I’ve been with the poor team building, blatant double standards and favoritism-based policies. I cleared out my desk then, and have only kept food here since. Not having to “stick it out” under this sort of stress because it’s practical is kind of a huge weight off. Or I’m trading for a different weight. 🙂
Determination
Did I say I was de-motivated? That’s only in terms of this job right now, not the next one. I’m absolutely charged with the energy to find the next place where I can give my time and dedication to a good cause. (And receive a good check, in return, of course!!)
Alternate plan
If I don’t land anything before the layoff? I’ll take my severance, and my unemployment, and go nanny my best friend’s newborn for a couple months while I continue to job hunt. The timing’s about right. They’ll “pay” me room and board, and I’ll pay for COBRA. And thank PF-blogging for a good emergency fund. But what to do with my parents …..
Edit: I forgot to link to this great article guest posted by Jacques Sprenger at The Digerati Life: Are you in Financial Trouble? Money Tips to Cope with Hard Times.
November 23, 2008
I’ve been MIA for a bit; life has been a blend of all kinds of hectic, stress, and demotivation.
My doctor hunted me down, or his nurse assistant did, and made me come in for an appointment on Friday. This is how you know we’re grown up now: I may avoid the doc, but I’ll still take a day off, and go in knowing that I’m going to get poked with a needle. Back in the day, you couldn’t even get me in the car if I thought a doctor’s visit was in the offing! So yes, I’m all mature now. And I’ve got a quarter sized bruise where the phlebotomist more interested in gossiping with her fellow labbies jabbed me for several tubes of blood, and my left arm is still sore from the flu shot. They’re covered by my insurance, but I didn’t know that until this year because I avoid unnecessary shots like the plague. I still have to see the optometrist and the dentist.
On the way home, I dropped in on a girlfriend who has a brand new baby: only 6 weeks old! She was tiny. And very cute. I meant to spend an hour with her and go get some work done but she invited me to her girls-only lunch, so we sushied until one pm. [$18.50] My share should have been less as the other girls got $2 drinks each and I drank water, but s’ok. I haven’t seen them in many moons, and the opportunity to play with an itsy-bitsy baby was worth the detour.
Since I’m never in town on a weekday, I stopped into my salon to have my unkempt eyebrows groomed, my lady says that business is down about 50%! For folks who rent their station in these salons, that has got to hurt. [$12]
Last stop was for 4 hours of Scan-a-thon. Whoever “they” are, they’re right, by the way: no one works harder than a lazy person to avoid work. As this may be the last major batch of scanning, and the files have all been transferred to my laptop, and organized to boot, that was the most diligent effort I’ve ever made to justify not doing my actual work. But, I can now shred another huge sack of paper.
I was determined to make the most of Saturday: take the truck in for appraisals, get a haircut, get my work started/done, and finish a load of laundry all before a semi-formal dinner event that night. Then I changed my mind: just get all the work done at home (work and laundry) and work on the truck on Sunday. The change of plans did me in. We had an unannounced power outage “for maintenance” starting at 8:30 and scheduled to end in the evening. This meant no laundry, no computer to work on (my laptop can’t sustain life on battery for more than a minute) sooo ….. change of plans again. Running errands earned me $4 for dropping off a big bag of stuff at my friend’s garage sale, I got a very little work done, dropped off a ton of books for a friend. That was about all I could manage before getting ready to go to the dinner.
Dinner was good fun, lots of good food, friends, and a five month old baby needing babysitting. Let me tell ya, I needed that tequila on the rocks after toting him around for nearly an hour. Terribly cute, but he got awfully heavy.
Today? Wasted most of it resting, and am so very overwhelmed by all the things remaining to be done, much like FB was feeling. Just can’t seem to muster the motivation to get started on the thousand things that need to get done. Even though I purged another 30-40 books, there’s still have a long way to emptying the bookshelf, tons of containers under my bed and desk to clear out, the closet is still not pared down enough, I have work to do for the upcoming Monday that’s still not getting done, my tax records need updating and organizing, there’s a friend and movie I’ve rescheduled once already this weekend and would feel flaky doing it again, but there are still job related problems to address and resolve. Escape Brooklyn and the NYTimes are freaking me out with talk of a Depression, news of the continuing economic hardships, woes of public transportion.
It’s not just me, one good friend is going through similar work and family related stresses so I need to support him, another friend is pregnant and requires attention there, another friend is recovering from medical problems and is stressed about her schooling future and career.
And it’s Thankgiving weekend next week. I planned to be done with so much more by now! Or imagined that I’d be much further along. *sigh*
Sorry for the laundry list and venting, I know it’s not helping me get anything done when it seems like I have just over a month to go and more tasks than hours to do them in. And the grocery shopping needs to be done. Gah. Better get cracking. At least I slept off most of the pain in my arms, wrists and hands from stressing them beyond their usual limits while babysitting. Not crippled for a day or two: major plus!
Also a plus: despite all the crazed feeling, at the very least, my financial life is currently holding steady. Might not last too much longer depending on the economy, but for now, it’s ok.
April 4, 2008
Good News: Friend looked at my car yesterday, as did his dad, and both agreed that the damage has not compromised the structure of the undercarriage. Lots of scrapes, more in some places than others, and half the bumper’s gone, but it’s just the cosmetic bits. She’s safe to drive without repairs for now. At some point I’ll replace the bumper but I’ll do that myself (er, by that I mean, Friend will teach me now), as well as repairing or replacing the scraped up frame rail.
Bad News: Drama, drama, drama-rama at work. Little Boss has been very sensitive, and feels like the staff doesn’t defer to him enough.
Unfortunately, this is a sticky situation because he started off trying to be everyone’s friend when they were hired and didn’t establish a rapport of authority like I did (I’m boss first, friend second), he has a double standard when it comes to the females (get away with everything) and males (don’t get credit for anything), and hasn’t been doing his job as a manager because he’s stuck catering to Big Boss.
The list goes on, but he also shares many of the traits that it appears SingleMa’s former boss possesses. He’s instigated a “quarterly discussion and review” in which he spent most of one person’s review commenting on other employees. Surprise!
And it’s my turn today! Can’t wait to hear what he’s interpreted as my failure to support him, when in fact, I’m doing the managing that he doesn’t have time for.
Good News: I’ve been getting random free stuff 🙂
Bad News: Bosses offered us a free, floater vacation day because we had to work a holiday two months ago without extra compensation, and then tried to take it away from C1, the only one who’s had opportunity to take it, yesterday. “Forgot”? HMPH! Don’t even go there!
Good News: I’m meeting a lot of new visitors here lately, and it’s great to have my loyal readers contributing to the conversation regularly.
Bad News: My personal life is still a major jumble. I’m definitely taking some time to let things settle out, but it’s taking way too long for my taste. It’s probably not good that I keep thinking I want to quit my job and home, and take off at the end of the year to who-knows-what-‘n’-where, though.
Good News: I have great couple friends who are easy and fun to third-wheel with. That’s usually a weird position to be in, but they’re great, and are perfectly willing to rescue me from my house randomly.
Bad News: My parents still need a LOT of training. They keep doing things I specifically ask them not to do.
Good News: It’s Friday!!
March 7, 2008
Apparently, the bad day wasn’t going to end with the overdraft fees.
Coworker 3 got really sick yesterday and didn’t have a ride home, so I left the office at the same time to give him a lift from the train station.
An hour after I’d dropped him off at home and my dad off at work, I headed to Wamu to deposit some checks that I’d just gotten. And I was using the additional ATM around a dark corner of the bank building, which is creepy enough, when some guy came and stood directly behind me where I couldn’t see him, instead of standing in line where you’re supposed to around the corner. And the Wamu card in my wallet was expired. I took that, and the creepy guy behind me, as a sign to just get out of there.
Only to discover that my mom had gotten another flat tire driving my car. This is the second one in two weeks, the SIXTH one in two years.
Had to go home, pick up the right card, and head back out to other Wamu in town.
And at the less creepy drive-up ATM, the first of my three checks were deposited, and the other two were rejected because I’d “reached my daily limit.” ???? There’s a limit on how many deposits I can make??? I got really hot, but it was almost 8 pm by then, and there was nothing I could do except yell at the machine. So I did. At least I’d deposited the checks in order from greatest to smallest amounts, so it covered the overdrafted amounts and then some.
Finally, upon getting home, I discovered that my old puppy is just failing. He’s not eating anymore, and I’m going to have to make the appointment to take him in to the vet. For you know what. Just thinking it is breaking my heart.
I know I’m not defeated, but it sure feels like it.
At least today’s another day.