March 20, 2011
The Goal: Roli Roti Pork Sandwiches
At $8.50 for a modestly-sized Pork Porchetta Sandwich, I silently promised myself that it would be awesome. And anyway, it’s all Friend’s fault. Having emerged once again, as he does once a quarter, or something like that, from the backwoods, he craves the oddest things that mean civilization. This trip, the Sandwich was Civilization.
After queuing in the pelting rain, wandering off to examined the neighboring florist’s purple and red anemones, bulbish strawflowers, and huddling in my hood, we finally pulled up to the actual truck itself where four congenial fellows were ripping apart various pork portions, grinning at the anticipatory patrons.
One of the two check-out folk asked for our order but seemed not to know enough English to do anything with the information, having gotten it. With their severely limited menu, I wasn’t sure where I was going wrong. They only had one sandwich on the menu. Friend and I turned to each other, perplexed, “Sandwiches? Two, please? One with the cress and one with the arugula?” Still blank. One of the sandwich compilers quickly explained they were out of the cress, was the arugula alright? “Well, sure! Two of the only sandwiches you’ve got then, please!” She was still perplexed. Her compatriot took over at the point, asking what we’d like, acting as if we hadn’t just gone two complete rounds with the person two inches away. I suspect this is not an unusual situation. 😉
The sandwich was rather divine. Full of sweet and salty flavor, soft pork melted into the onion with crunchy bits, layered with the harder, more substantial slices of pork. We waited too long to eat the sandwiches so the arugula didn’t stand out against the pork, but it didn’t melt either, so it was fine. It was heaped in the right proportions into a ciabatta roll they get from the bakery inside the Ferry Building. With the harder crust, the bread doesn’t fall apart which is absolutely critical in a sandwich – I absolutely hate sandwiches and burgers where the wrapper collapses.
We took a small side of roasted potatoes as well and the rosemary salting – delicious. The potatoes were more like chunks, huge chunks. Not a problem for this potato lover.
At $20 for a lunch for two, no drinks, it’s a bit steep for lunching more frequently than as a treat but it’s absolutely worth it as a treat. Come visit me so I have an excuse to go again? 😉
February 9, 2011
As I’ve mentioned on Twitter a couple of times, we have a dear friend coming to stay with us soon.
She’s older and can’t
camp out like our usual friends are willing to on the sofa, the fold-out bed, or the air mattress. And, well, she’s accustomed to the finer things in life. As she should be, she’s been comfortably retired for years after quite a successful career in the financial sector. She’s been incredibly good to us for the years of our friendship, too, not just because she’s financially able to but she’s been ever so giving of her time and energy when we needed support.
Thus, PiC’s immediate reaction was: Sell the fold-out couch! Buy a new bed!
I sort of thought he was kidding … but he’s not. We’re now going to have a real guest room with a full size bed and all that.
The sofa’s listed on Craigslist for about $200 less than the store price (it’s still available in stores, it’s in perfect condition since it’d hardly ever been used) and he’s getting all the usual slew of poor written, can’t-follow-instructions, didn’t-read-the-ad responses. Here’s hoping that it sells quickly because he’s now doing his research on a new (also Craigslisted) bed frame and mattress, using Jonathan’s guide to
decoding the Heavenly Bed.
Who knew it’d take panic shopping to send him to PF blogs? 😉
On the matter of mattresses, would you ever buy a used mattress?
December 18, 2010
In any season, I think it’s appropriate to think of others, actually, but this is particularly timely for a few reasons. My good friend and fellow blogger J. Money of BudgetsAreSexy.com has been toiling long and hard on this fantastic project called LoveDrop (defunct, now).
It’s a micro-giving network intended to target people in need, one person or family per month, and surprise them with a bundle of financial gifts and other assistance. This started as very much a grassroots campaign, so although it’s not a not-for-profit organization and your contributions aren’t tax deductible, it’s for a very good cause. The project officially launches on January first, but it’s certainly open for people to purchase a subscription and get involved.
The group does have to pay taxes so the ratio of your contributions breaks down as follows: 50% to the recipients, 20% to taxes and 30% to organizational overhead.
Score one for transparency, and ten points to these guys for pursuing their passion of changing the world, one ‘drop at a time!
And to add to the mix, just as I completed the last touches on this post, I heard that LoveDrop co-founder and friend J. had been fired. Frankly, given all the projects in his head that need birthing with so few hours in the day, it couldn’t have happened to a better man. So consider supporting the cause and becoming a member because wouldn’t it be fantastic to help one of our own realize a dream of making the world a better place?
November 25, 2010
Having seen PiC off to the airport, my hometown friend D and I are spending a quiet Thanksgiving weekend together in the Bay Area without our families because making our ways back to Southern California just wasn’t in the cards for either of us. His reasons are his own and not mine to share, but mine are, of course, not precisely a secret.
Since moving away, I’ve been a mess of conflict struggling to remain a dutiful daughter from hundreds of miles away; fighting to establish my place in a new job, and adjusting to a new home and shifting relationship dynamics.
For the first time in four years, PiC and I are in the same city all the time. We pick up the phone and schedule a shared commute, shared dinner plans, shared grocery shopping and budget. In most ways, it’s nearly been seamless. In others, we’ve picked up our bones of contention and sparred a few rounds. At the end of the day, it’s all worked out and I’m more grateful than ever that this was the end to my almost year-long stint of unemployment. It was horribly nerve-wracking at the time, and could have been the biggest mistake ever, but so far, it’s been a huge support.
Conversely, however, for the first time in my life, I don’t live steeped entirely and totally in the family stress. And so in a strange turn of dis-inoculation, perhaps call it weakening by means of detoxification, my spirit quails at the thought of venturing back into the fray, each and every time. Every visit has been emotionally fraught, always including fights with the sibling when we run into each other, the heartwrenching sag in my mom’s cheeks, left behind from her stroke-like episodes in 2008 and other small signs of disrepair in my former home and crumbling family foundations.
After several rounds of trying to walk it off, and playing the stiff upper lip game, it was time to admit defeat. I simply couldn’t face it again this weekend, not this holiday weekend when the expectations of family are at a near all-time high. I just didn’t have the strength to pull a shroud around my soul again, and I don’t have the ability to pretend that that is business as usual. Until I have taken steps to get my parents out of their living situation and dealt with my feelings of guilt for “abandoning” them, I need to keep my physical distance for a while longer.
While I wasn’t totally happy with the decision, I haven’t had any nightmares since deciding to stay in town for the weekend. And with a friend to keep me company, I’ll actually cook dinner to eat while reading comics all day. It’s probably the best decision for me right now, and it’s about time I learned how to make those kinds of decisions in addition to taking care of everything and everyone else.
Happy Thanksgiving to all my American readers and a wonderful weekend to everyone else! I hope you’re enjoying peace, quiet, and comfort and remember all the blessings we have in our lives. I hope you’re able to do that every day, regardless of the season.
Thanks to all you faithful friends and readers for being there in the virtual world and in some cases, in real life as well. I’m grateful for everyone’s support, online and off, you’ve made the journey this far so much more positive and even enjoyable than it was when I was just a young pup struggling to make ends meet with my minimum wage job and a checkbook.
<3
October 25, 2010
After a wonderful meal at a Korean tofu house with a friend we hadn’t seen for a few months, she wanted to make plans to meet for dinner again during the week before she left town.
That same day, I received a message from another friend who recently relocated to this coast. She planned to be in town to see family, could we have brunch when she landed Saturday? When I wasn’t available, she asked if we could come out to see her across the way Sunday. Though she didn’t specify it was a full day thing, history shows that’s going to be expected. All previous “come hang out with me” invitations have always turned into a day-long finagle-fest because she always wants to do just one more thing.
Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy her company but it’s really hard to commit full days to hanging out at the last minute like that because I’m usually running like a madwoman during the week to survive and use the weekends to become human again. Which, as you might imagine, is a little complicated after September’s hosting visitors every weekend (and seeral weekdays) but one.
That’s the crux of it, isn’t it? I quite enjoy seeing friends, of course, but the last minute requests and those that sometimes grow well beyond moderation are rather difficult to accommodate. Or even to want to accommodate; it requires a sanity check to make sure we’re not just constantly running to everyone’s beck and call because they’ve dropped in and didn’t we want to see them?
Sure, but I think it becomes taken for granted that we’ll always be available on their schedule and doesn’t call for much advance notice. That drives me, an inveterate planner, at least a little up the wall. I understand that not all trips are planned as far ahead as I would like but these texts and emails are increasingly and frequently coming with very little notice.
Aside from the limited time factor, I worry about the money we’re spending hand over fist with this stream of visitors. When we host, I can cook and feed them relatively (not very) frugal basis. But many times, we end up eating out because they’re in the city, we’re not, and it’s inconvenient for them to come to us and then trek back to the city.
While PiC and I have agreed on a rule of thumb on eating out, my personal budgeting rules have always stated that “entertaining” comes out of the same eating out allowance lest we end up using the personal 2x/week allowance, and entertain two or three times on top of that. Before you know it, we’ve spent most of the week eating out. My personal budgeting rules have been repeatedly smashed under the weight of the last minute traveler.
We can’t control the travel habits of our friends, and we certainly never want them to feel unwelcome or unloved, but it’s time to gently nudge them toward better notification habits. And we need to learn to set boundaries we’re comfortable with rather than self-guilting ourselves into doing far more for them than is necessary.
Do you have any trouble managing drop-ins or do you have a good standing policy that works well for you and yours?
August 3, 2010
aka The Poor Hostess.
We had friends over the other weekend. By “we” I mean, PiC said they could come stay for the weekend and then took off on a previously planned trip. I kid, we both agreed it’d be great to see them but he had plans he couldn’t change on the same weekend so that left me with them. And I was fine with that, they’re great fun. But I realized that I’m not only a less than social creature, I’m not a great hostess.
I have this personal definition or image of a good host: you always have fresh linens on the bed, you have all kinds of goodies in the fridge, cook every meal and clear up afterwards letting your guests be entertained at their leisure. Kind of like the best dinner party slash sleepover ever, right?
But realistically, how on earth does a single person DO all that?
I definitely presided over the cooking/kitchen, there were certainly clean linens for the air mattress, fresh towels in a newly cleaned bathroom and I set it up for them but they helped me with the dishes, used their own towels, and fought with me over every bill.
2 to 1, I was bound to lose some of those fights. And let’s be honest, I’m not really comfortable with the predominantly Asian contact sport known as Give-Me-The-Bill-Or-I’ll-Throw-An-Elbow on a number of levels.
Looking at it from the other side, my cousins, for example, have hosted me (I’m nearly the youngest in that grouping) and they paid for everything, took care of everything, and chased me away from the dishes in the long ago past. That’s where I imprinted the idea of good hosting. Then again, when I’ve stayed with friends, I’ve done their dishes (and their roommates’), cleared up any messes, and chipped in for meals and household supplies that I used.
So is this a generational thing? Or am I taking advantage of free labor?
What do you consider good hosting habits?
July 28, 2010
I’m barely mentally unpacked from San Diego Comic Con, and I’m looking up another itinerary to go back down to SoCal. I haven’t been *home* since May but this is another quick round trip. Possibly even a same day trip.
In a couple months, we’ll be memorializing the passing of my dear friend’s beloved father. We lost him exactly midway between my birthday and his – we were four days apart and he always joked that I was four days older than him. Growing up, I hated my birthdays because they were always strangely lonely, now I don’t know how to feel about it.
Every year that passes and takes with it another loved one makes every memory and tradition that much more poignant.
I’m considering using my Southwest award tickets for this trip. Between the recent vacation spending, the purchase of tickets for next year’s vacation, the upcoming dental expenses for both my parents, it behooves me to stop bleeding cash.
