By: Revanche

Removing grit from your life

March 9, 2021

*Wow I started this about a year ago. Now we have ANOTHER tiny human squawking frequently.

Not the perseverance kind of grit, we want to keep that in our lives.

The other kind that’s annoying and makes you feel itchy and irritable, like minor unnecessary arguments. I started the new year with a whole load of grumpiness. I was way behind in work, even though I’d worked all the holidays, because we also had a truckload of personal stuff to do (financial, family time, wanting to write for the blog after not feeling the urge to write for weeks, eating dinner every single night what is that why can we not just eat once a week??)

Solitary Diner talked about changing some things to make taking call less stressful. She can’t make call itself less stressful. But by figuring out that it’s the uncertainty of call, and how that uncertainty derails her, she was able to find a decent solution. By choosing not make a lot of plans on call days, she was able to appreciate it when call went her way instead of being upset when it didn’t go her way.

I had to make similar changes.

As parents: In our first year as parents, we had a tiny human squawking frequently. That derailment of my plans was doubly difficult when I’d had my heart set on getting some things done and getting some sleep that night. I tried to get everything done as things came up: caring for JB, answering emails, troubleshooting, admin work, walking the dog. But as my agent of change and chaos, while JB was the biggest variable, they weren’t the only one. As a result, I felt pulled in thirty six directions at once and I was always cranky. I finally tried compartmentalizing. When JB was awake, the only thing I did was handle JB and JB-adjacent tasks: laundry, clearing up, cooking, eating, organizing, packing lunch. All tasks during which JB could hang out with me and splitting my attention was no problem. There was no gourmet cooking happening, nothing on the stove ever needed my constant attention. When JB was asleep, the only thing I did was work.

Sectioning my day like that meant that while I still had to work a third shift, I was just tired, not tired, cranky, and frazzled.

I have to do something similar now that the pandemic is eating my brain and we’ve had JB home constantly. When I get tetchy, I have to do JB-adjacent things that don’t require my full attention.

Household 1: We recently just got my Roomba that I’ve been saving for. It’s been a 5 year dream in the saving! PiC pointed out that the dogs and their inability to drink without slopping half the bowl of water across the entire floor was going to be a problem. Roombas are not water bots. We’ve long been annoyed by the need to constantly mop up after our beloved pups who wanted to double as spraying hoses every time they drink but we’ve not considered what to ever actually done anything about it until now. I finally realized there was an area in the house I could move the food and water bowls to reduce the sloppage significantly, so I made the experimental shift. Mopping is down about 80%.

Household 2: I saved for years for this one. The Roomba itself is another way we’re gently removing some frustration. I want the floors to be vacuumed more frequently but I don’t have the energy or time to do it myself. The Roomba is a useful tool to help us out. Thanks to Wall-E, I imagine Ronnie has a personality as it scales minor obstacles, or gets stuck. I’m vastly enjoying being able to set Ronnie on the move and know my house is being cleaned while I work.

Household 3: We’ve stopped hand-washing all our dishes and instead run the dishwasher 2-4 times a week. If you told me ten years ago that PiC would relent on this chore, I’d have laughed my butt off. But here we are!

Work: I reconfigured software to give me quick access to my frequently used tools. Then I redesigned some templates that I were both clunky and didn’t work great. Now they are aesthetically pleasing and I get the job done faster! There has yet to be software to stop me from accidentally hitting “cancel” instead of “save” or closing a tab I didn’t mean to close, though.

All of this makes me think of that West Wing scene when Bruno tells the President that he would be a fool to ignore any tactic that won’t hurt them and can reduce drag on the campaign. I agree with the sentiment and really need to practice this more.

:: What things bother you? Can any of them be fixed with a small adjustment?

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